I had a snoo today. one of epic proportions. one of the two major problems bothering me for a couple of years has kinda been lifted a bit. was a financial one, and one I couldn't influence or change. I'm great a dealing with problems generally ... I'm a tenacious mofo, and if it's solvable and down to my own behaviour or whatever, then I'll solve it. If I can't influence a situation, therefore I can't solve it, then I normally back away and withdraw from the situation and take it out of my life if possible (for reasons of maintaining ones sanity, a self preservation device). But there are occasionally situations that you're subjected to that you can't influence or can't change but that are really unpleasant and cause you lots of stress. Not very often but occasionally. So you generally have to rationalise them and accept them and work around them, and you can feel a little better for doing that, and then continue soldiering on.
... which is fine, if it's behaviourally related and about other people, because people are ace, and it's hard to dislike people in your life that you have no control over (even if your relationship with them causes you stress). But if it's financial, it's a totally different thing, and hard to rationalise. Especially if it's not your fault, and it's THEIR fault .. the financial theirs. Anyhow, today I feel liberated from a great depressive weight that's been unbelievably crippling over the last 1-2 years. Tears, appreciation and smiles this evening. And a liberating weight lift.
This makes me very happy, mainly because I can now (almost) make a start on adopting a furry critter. I miss furry critters so much. I'm easily pleased as a human, and know myself incredibly well. I don't need £ or things that cost £, I can live on very little, I don't need much to be genuinely happy. But I've been incredibly sad recently without a four legged buddy, and I'd stopped myself from adopting one on the basis that I wouldn't buy one until I'd sorted out some key life problems I'd been having (in hope that it would inspire and motivate me to sort those problems out more quickly).
Anyway, no more rambling. Today was a good day though
