Dosing Smoking two ounces+ a week lately

[moonyham]

So things have gotten out of hand for me a tad. I have smoked daily for about 15 years with minimal breaks. In the last 5 years especially I have gone harder, only when going on holiday have I really had multiple days of no smoking - until I find a dealer that is, which is usually days or a week at most.


I'm in my 30's and no health problems, but I do cough more than I'd like when smoking weed(although not every time). Lately I have been smoking 2 ounces every 5-7 days. I do this in the form of spliffs. A 20 pack of cigarettes will last me about 2 ounces in terms of tobacco to weed ratio. so 20g~ tobacco to 60g~ of weed or there abouts.


Unfortunately for me, I don't have ordinary barriers like most people do to prevent this situation. I can afford all the weed I'd ever want, I don't work/am retired and the 'me' without weed is a hazard to myself and society. I become confrontational and my already high risk taking self goes into overdrive. Cars get crashed, fights break out, friends become foes. I just am incredibly irate, unable to focus, and generally unsettled without weed. I know I have some kind of ADHD stuff going on and I'm definitely autistic. In saying all this - I become a superman version of myself when I haven't smoked weed for a few days/week if I can lock in(big if) I can achieve things in hours that would normally take days or weeks. I can see amazing opportunity, I can see so much more 'clearly' in every way and act on it in a meaningful way- but at the cost of being emotionally unstable and easily distracted and basically a volatile hazard to everyone around them including myself.

So, I take the easier road to deal with. I smoke shit loads of weed. Its less productive - I don't have great business ideas that I act on, I don't really make any 'progress' in life as most would think of it. I become anti social and don't bother with friends and family. I stagnate but I'm no longer a 'risk'. However.. 2 ounces a week(well, I run out before the week is up) is just too much smoking. I am waking up feeling very tired - I don't really have energy at any point of the day. My mental clarity peaks at about midnight to 3am. Anything I need to organize/plan/do in my life that requires real thinking is done in these hours. Also, I don't think I even feel weed at this point. The first spliff of the day would always hit me and I'd really feel it - now its just to get me out of the agitated state I wake up in.

I really need help. This is not sustainable. I don't really know what to do. I feel like I legit need a professional and to be put on some kind of less fucked up/disruptive drug, something more 'in between' these two states of mine. However I also worry about ever divulging this to someone in that regard - even though medical weed is legal here I basically got cut off by my weed doctor and they only prescribe me one ounce a month now. I feel like a psychiatrist would just think I'm a druggie wanting more drugs.

 

[foodcrisis]

i smoke about an ounce and a half every two weeks at this point. i won't be able to forever, i just have the opportunity to because it's cheap and i live with my parents.. i have to say, it doesn't really feel sustainable for the lungs to keep up smoking that much weed. i think that is something to think about. if i didn't know i was gonna have to cut down when i move, i wouldn't be indulging like i am.

if you are having problems dealing with out weed and can't use in moderation and want to seek medication from a psychiatrist, i would say the psychiatrist would be a huge jerk not to take the description of your health seriously, but i hear all sorts of stories about dick quack docs on the internet that don't help people correctly... you might want to wait and get some more responses with people with more experience when trying to figure out how to deal with a doctor. i really don't know what you should say, but i would say some doctor out there would take your description very seriously and want to help you with your addiction. it sounds like you are having a rough time.

wishing you luck and hoping you get some more detailed responses from other posters.

 

[moonyham]

i smoke about an ounce and a half every two weeks at this point. i won't be able to forever, i just have the opportunity to because it's cheap and i live with my parents.. i have to say, it doesn't really feel sustainable for the lungs to keep up smoking that much weed. i think that is something to think about. if i didn't know i was gonna have to cut down when i move, i wouldn't be indulging like i am.

if you are having problems dealing with out weed and can't use in moderation and want to seek medication from a psychiatrist, i would say the psychiatrist would be a huge jerk not to take the description of your health seriously, but i hear all sorts of stories about dick quack docs on the internet that don't help people correctly... you might want to wait and get some more responses with people with more experience when trying to figure out how to deal with a doctor. i really don't know what you should say, but i would say some doctor out there would take your description very seriously and want to help you with your addiction. it sounds like you are having a rough time.

wishing you luck and hoping you get some more detailed responses from other posters.

Thank you for your words. I guess that is kinda what I'm asking here - how do I navigate this. I have the absolutely worst luck with doctors and still have not figured out how to navigate around them. One of my biggest weaknesses is communicating/working with people where there is an imbalance of power. I like to be on equal ground. The only boss I've ever been able to get along with is myself. Doctors in my experience have crazy egos and dislike independent thought.

Example: I recently have been having bad bowel movements since coming back from south america. Had worms appear in the toilet, took OTC antiparasitic but am quite sure I have other parasites in me from extensive travelling in not so clean countries around the world. Cannot get proper antiparasitic drugs that would deal with ones I got in other countries OTC...and despite literally being in dozens of countries in the last couple of years - many with zero health standards and known issues with parasites - despite literally shitting out worms - they would not prescribe me anything and I have to give them a sample of my shit? Like fuck sakes man... even if I didn't have other parasites, its not going to hurt to just do a round regardless out of caution given where I have been.

And I feel like I'm being fucked with because its so hard for me to remember to shit in that sample thing, its been 2 weeks. I feel like he knew I'd struggle with this and its an easy way to reduce load on our medical system...

Anyway sorry for being gross its just recent and on my mind. You are right though, this is not sustainable on my lungs. I am 'fit and healthy' looking but my stamina is terrible and tobacco isnt great to be smoking unfiltered especially in any amount...