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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards

slipped up, back on subs

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dittybopmonster

Bluelighter
Joined
Sep 14, 2011
Messages
66
ive been stabilized on 4mg of subs twice a day for about a month now. this morn i slipped up and went to buy a few bundles. when i went to take money out, i saw that my check was not deposited this morn (guessing bc of the holiday), so being a complete moron, took out what i had left in my account to buy 7 bags. After doing a bag, I did not feel anything because so much sub has been built up in my system for so long now. Only two hours later, I decided to just stash the bags for future endeavors and to do a 4mg sub. Knowing about and having gone thru precip WD, I was feeling confident that my morning dose was blocked and id be ok to dose. When I took the dose - i was right, i was completely fine despite doing a bag only 2 hours prior. It seems that if u have subs built in ur system, and ur more dependent on subs - u can do a bag or so, then do the sub after with no fear of precip WD. Weird shit.

/End Blahg

P.S. I do miss gettin high on dope, but almost prefer being on subs then being high on dope and always worrying bout my next fix. These past 3 weeks of only subbing have been crucial for me as i have excelled in both work and school under the aegis of subutex.
 
the subs will keep you out of the high risk lifestyle of scoring and running around town with dope. it even felt ok for a little while, for me, then about a year into it it didnt feel shiny and nice any more. I quit after 18 months of it and the w/d's were NOT fun . Stay out of jail, man. Thats not fun, either . ESPECIALLY if you have to w/d IN JAIL. Thats the worst of all .
 
I have discovered basically the same with my concurrent sub/dope use... If for some reason I feel the need to take sub a few hours after doing dope it IS possible, but usually I wait longer than you do since I'm terrified of precipitated withdrawals as well... And you are right, they are not a blast :/ I have completely abandoned opioids with long half lives for the time being though, and right now I'm only using Oxycodone and, sadly, heroin too sometimes.
 
righteous responses the both of u. life on subs is going well. unfortunately not my first rodeo. been on and off subs for years. they really do help me get in line after sometimes months of excessive dope use. and btw, when i was using dope excessively, i would have days where i didnt have the necessary funds to score. that left me taking a sub after days of using. even after waiting 18 hours, i would take a sub to quickly then experience debilitating precipitated withdrawals. for those that are not familiar with precip wd first hand...it is hell on earth. nothing short. it is a black hole of terror, pain, dysphoria, and anguish. u will beg for a bullet in your head. ive to this day never experienced something so egregious and agonizing. its pure evil. i know junkies wanna dose now, but if ur reading thise, and you are loking to switch from dope/oxy/opana/morphine etc to buprenorphne...use extreme caution. id put precip wd's up against benzo wd for the terror aspect of both experiences, despite the slight edge benzo wd has in shittyness with it being fatal and all. anyways, safe dosing friends!!!

monster
 
in my eyes, you did not slip up as nearly everyone who tries to go clean relapses; it is a normal part of the process. as long as you keep up your sobriety, than you should be to complete recovery. however keeping your sobriety will be a constant battle. keep truckin, it's hard but definitely doable
 
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