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Sexy Job

"Guys like this" would be someone that expresses a clear and absolute desire to treat someone/you in this case as a sex object/fuck doll/etc.
There's a level of dominance/ownership over the person that's being objectified. That level, the degree to which the extreme needs to be pushed may be at a exceptable level to begin with. But typically in a relationship of this kind, there's a need on the part of the dominant/aggressor to push things further. If things aren't pushed to a more extreme place then the situation can become stale for them and the object/submissive can become boring or lose their luster to the dominant.
So, my concern would be that even if the level of submission/objectification is acceptable to you to begin with, it may not be long before the requests or demands become more extreme, more invasive, and/or more unpleasant.
And that even if you're able to adjust to those new demands it may not be long before new, more extreme requests are demanded.
Or not. I don't know for sure that this is the case with this guy and I'm not some kind of self professed expert by any means. This is just what's coming out of my mind in trying to explain what I meant.
I hope it's exactly what you want it to be. Just in reading your original explanation, combined with some of my own experiences, there's some aspects that concern me.

Would he be willing to let you speak or correspond in some form with his last secretary before making your final decision?
 
If I was your husband I would kick you to the curb and make you fight tooth a nail for access to your child when I found out. And he will eventually, contract or not, people you work with will know what's going on.

Sound harsh? Perhaps, but can you honestly say your husband wouldn't feel the same? If you are doing nothing wrong then surely you have nothing to fear telling your husband.
 
I remember when a BL-er poster up that she was an escort. She allowed everyone to ask her questions and took everything in stride. It was...educational and eye-opening. Few of us see into that world.

This, on the other hand, I feel is just opening you up to criticism. You appear very open in SL&R. Your first post was not to ask for advice (especially seeing as this position is somewhat specialized), nor was it to give advice. Honestly, it was blog material. It has since moved onto a Q&A format, but it will, in typical SL&R format derail and degrade from there.

You have just recently entered into the "life long" contract of marriage with a man I'll assume you knew well (but didn't have sex with until after being married), and sought no legal advice. Yet, going into a paid sex worker position, you are looking for legal help.

You are already considering the legal ramifications of this job.
You are already considering the psychological ramifications of this job

You are already considering the ramifications of this job on your daughter.


This is completely disregarding the fact that you would be having an affair within the first year of matrimony and be paid for it.

That's my SL&R response.


My TL response: are you fucking srs?! get your head on straight for you and your daughter. oh, and the new guy- your husband.
 
Yea this it totally fucked up to your husband. You must not particularly like him if you are willing to do this to him. Why don't you divorce him, you obviously have a job. You are also going to have this blow up in your face. Have you talked to the previous secretary to see how this guy is after the initial rush of fucking someone new? Eventually something will happen...
 
If she was single or even in an open relationship this job would probably work. Huge potential for a head fuck but doable non the less. Most people who get paid are usually the dominant one in the transaction. The fact that you will be the submissive means it is essentially a form of paid slavery. The feminist in me thinks you owe the rest of the worlds females a huge apology if you go through with this.
 
If I was married to a woman and she did that to me I would be pissed. I think he would know because you pussy might get looser. I would be able to tell.

I don't know how I would react but it wouldn't be positive. Seeing how you made a family with this guy, its pretty fucked up.

Some guys might kill over this. I would probably seek full custody and sue that CEO for alienation of affection. The I would most likely want to castrate him. But if I was in his shoes and found out. I would get full custody and sue both you and your boss. That is betrayal on so many levels.

I really think that is fucked up. Since you are even considering it. I think its safe to say your marriage is in poor shape or will be soon.

Honestly that shit makes me sick. I don't mean to be rude, I am being honest.
 
My husband would never know.
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Sexual demands include 8am model and fuck, mid-morning bj or other, and afternoon as well. Call at 9pm to ask Daddy what he wants me to wear the next day.
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Re:
So, let me get this straight, your husband would never know that you were cheating on him? I mean, obviously cheaters don't want their partner to know. I find this ridiculous for someone in a serious, committed, monogamous relationship
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Siggh, there is black and white, good and bad; there is no grey... your can try to justify this as much as you want -- even turn to a selective group of people who will validate your own acts. BUT, seriously? WTF.

Be ashamed for even asking this. Anyone who will do this is just a piece of trash and deserves the worst. If my wife lied to me like this, I would kick her out immediately.

Actually, maybe I think you should do it... a person even considering doing this to her husband, deserves nothing worse than such a humiliating job. Your marriage will probably blow over very soon if you have this little respect for your husband.
 
I find nothing wrong with the sex industry to begin with. That sounds like a decent job if you're not in a monogamous relationship, if you're single, whatever. But when you have a husband and you have agreed on monogamous terms, I really think this is a bad idea.
 
Hiding something that big from your husband, that's a big deal. I don't hide the fact that I do amateur porn do my bf and he's okay with it. I do NOT have sex with other guys though. (Although he's pretty open minded and would be okay with it under certain circumstances.)

If your husband isn't satisfying you sexually, that's another thing you have to deal with.
 
I don't think what the OP is contemplating would be wrong if she was not married.

But the fact that she is putting a double standard on the her marriage like that is wrong. Her partner in life deserves some input.

Relationships are about communication. If you don't communicate it goes south. I think her husband will pick up on the alienation a bit. He may not know what is causing it at first, but its wrong. Unless the OP runs it by him and gives him a pass to shag someone else, this is going to weigh on him and even then it may weigh on him regardless.

The OP is walking down a dark path of betrayal and she should know it. I think maybe the whole thing seems exciting or its a way out of the relationship in terms of financial independence. But if she plans on her marriage surviving this, I think she is deluding herself.

Also if her husband were to hire a private detective, he would have proof very easily.
 
Because as bad as this is to say, this has a little bit more class to it.

She's not fucking 7 weird ass old men at once. Different men. Every day.

HIV AIDS HPV to name a few?

It's a multimillionaire that is paying for her wardrobe, house & the food on the table for her kid. And obviously because he's the boss he will have a natural alpha male personality which biologically women like.

And she's getting paid to fuck on the job isn't that the dream?

Fuck I'd wear a skirt and fuck a millionaire if the price was right. And I'm a man.

But I'm not married.

I'll ask: Why the fuck is the husband in India? Why aren't you with him or why isn't he with you?
 
Cohesion said:
Yes I am exploring whether this is good or bad. Potential risks anyone can think of?
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Interesting, how you phrase this: good or bad for you? Are you sure what is good for the Self is also the Good as such?

You seem to have a very narrow moral perspective. What if your husband finds out after a year. Becomes horribily depressed? Eventually suicidal. Kills himself.

Where in your post here have you taken into account his point of view to reflect about the good and bad?

===

It is called sex work. It's a profession with a valid history.
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So, what's your point? Slavery is also a human practice with a valid history, does that justify it or make any less innocent?

Well, maybe I am to harsh on you on this last one. You can choose whatever you do with your own body. However, you cannot do whatever you want when other people are involved and you can cause them a lot of emotional pain.
 
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Dave82 said:
I have to disagree. I would have more respect for a prostitute.
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For her, personally, living without the husband but with the kid, he may be earning fuck all in India (I don't hear that place vomiting money and having clean health care) so in THIS respect of NOT walking the block and become a human cumdumpster to every tom dick and harry in Las Vegas, this is where it is better.

Morally, this thread brings up a lot of shit memories like my ex cheating on me with my best friend. Debilitating trust issues have plagued me ever since, and reading shit like this only dampens my hope for the future.
 
If your marriage is open and you don't mind surrendering so much control, do it. I'd just make sure I had a contract that clearly stated what he can and can't do. Negotiate for at-will employment so you can quit if you don't like it, get bored, etc.

If your marriage isn't open, this is a bad idea. I don't understand why you'd stay with someone who doesn't satisfy you sexually, but that's a whole 'nother thread.
 
Cohesion said:
@Not Again
Please tell me one by one what is wrong with this. It is called sex work. It's a profession with a valid history.

.
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1. whores don't get the most pleasurable experience, they're not men.
2. You have to be of such scummy, low character to be one.
3. The rightful stigma for being a prostitute, and wait for it...
4. Disease.

You will lose your dignity, you are constantly looked down upon, the guys often are desperate and have no respect for girls who hire sex work ( now refereed as a prostitute from here on) so it is not as pleasurable as thought. its also a career where its on looks alone, creating a very negative view on whats important. It creates problems for the future when they(you) want a normal relationship. Don't forget STDs (possible)as well. Girls often also go onto drugs and other things once they lay down their morals.

Before you even get into it, realize that it’s not that easy to have sex with a stranger(s) what's to say he doesn't ask you to join with another girl or guy friend? i. When you’re having sex, you’re at your most vulnerable. This guy will also get tired of you. I don't care what any one says. It's just a matter of time before he tosses you to the side. By then you will have prolly be attached and used to him "Controlling "you and you won't have any idea what to do. Possibly making you turn to more drugs , alcohol and what ever.

You don't know this guy. Did you run a background at least? At the very least run a background check and hire a Private eye and find out what his life is really about. What if you get caught up in some big time mob shit, or something like that?

Oh did I also mention that your married...
 
Goddamn, the more I think about it, I more I've realized this is probably the most fucked up thing you could possibly do to your husband. Seriously, shooting him is less fucked up. When he finds out (not if) you will kill him on the inside.

Please, if you're going to do this, which you probably are, please divorce him. Did you guys just get married for your daughters sake?
 
Tude said:
If your marriage is open and you don't mind surrendering so much control, do it. I'd just make sure I had a contract that clearly stated what he can and can't do. Negotiate for at-will employment so you can quit if you don't like it, get bored, etc.

If your marriage isn't open, this is a bad idea. I don't understand why you'd stay with someone who doesn't satisfy you sexually, but that's a whole 'nother thread.
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If it's an open marriage, there would be nothing to hide.
 
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