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Sexless Relationships.

Tell him no more porn or jacking off.

That is certainly the source of his problems in bed.

Without jacking off he will have to have sex.

He certainly is not asexual.
I assume it's heterosexual porn he consumes?

How about when he wants to j off he lays on his back, looks at his porn, while you stroke his cock with your vagina, he can pretend its his hand instead then.

Oh and get him onto Viagra too.

I don't think his problem is as permanent or as mysterious as he would like you to think.


If he can come in the hand he can come in the vaginal canal, unless, he's gay or otherwise not attracted, or already sated, by hand.


Men generally only orgasm once per session.
 
Sadly everything you guys have said I told him to do or at least try... He can't do jack shit, not stop porn nor jacking off, he ends up just doing and not caring or just lying and I find out ( its obvious ). He just thinks it won't work so why try it? :( I guess our relationship is just going to end up ending soon I don't think I can do a sexless relationship. :'(
 
-Kitten said:
Sadly everything you guys have said I told him to do or at least try... He can't do jack shit, not stop porn nor jacking off, he ends up just doing and not caring or just lying and I find out ( its obvious ). He just thinks it won't work so why try it? :( I guess our relationship is just going to end up ending soon I don't think I can do a sexless relationship. :'(
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I thought you had of tried all that, generally asking strangers is the last thing one does when needing help.

Have you told him you can't continue the relationship, as it stands.

Anyway good luck to you.
 
He sounds straight up addicted to porn, he was jerking off to it and trying to hide it from you, that is not normal behavior. Also, if he is jerking off right before sex then no wonder he can't get it up and cum. If I jerk off even in the morning and then have sex at night I have trouble cumming unless I go at it for a crazy amount of time. Has he ever been to therapy for this? I am talking about consistent long term appointments with someone that specializes in sexual issues. I realize this is probably a difficult and embarrassing issue for him but I can tell you right now he needs to get this worked out, you are going to go absolutely crazy. Eventually it's going to wear you down.
 
So he can't get it up.. or he can but loses it and can't cum cause his erection has gone away? Also does he watch porn to jack-off or do you mean he jacks off to you? How old is he?

1. It could work as long as some type of sexual stuff was happening...
2. Like someone else said.. It may last forever because you guys may be more intimate from not having sex.. as long as there is some type of sexual activity.
3. Like I said,,, Wait has he tried medication for his problem? anyway like I said as long as there is some type of sexual activity and you can deal with whatever type of sexual activity it is... Have yall thought about an open relationship... Let him satisfy you with his fingers, tongue, toys, toes(lol) j/k, But seriously I have been in a relationship with little sex and it frustrated me alot, but it wasn't the reason we broke up.. that was for her making the wrong decision to try to be single... lol But when I get in another relationship and I am totally in love with that person... I would do anything for them.. especially if something was wrong with them where they couldn't have sex.. but there would have to be some other arrangements. so Thats my answer and questions.. I hope you answer my questions.. I may seriously be able to help! Thanks!
 
-Kitten said:
Meh, I for one never thought I would even consider such thing. Anywho just three questions....:

1. What do you think about it? - I think if it's not what you want - it's bad news...break it off.
2. Can it last?! - hell naw - it's doomed as you will get frustrated about the no-sex...
3. How the hell do you survive being with someone you are insanely attracted too but have no sex or very little sex?
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-you could masturbate A LOT and hope it gets bettr, by just being what he needs...

...chances are it won't work out though - how long has this carried on?? How long have you been together?

EDIT: he's a bit of a porn addict? agree with blueman then, get him out of his mood by joining in and reminding him that sex with you is much better than going solo. Honestly he just sounds depressed.
 
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Wait.. I didnt' know he was addicted to watchin porn.. so, my advice is talk to him about what kind of porn he likes then either act out the porn if you don't mind.. even if it is crazy porn.. you might like it yourself! Or watch porn with him and start stroking his cock or let him start then you get involved somehow and that should lead to sex... and enough of that and he should be able to get it up anytime.. because the thing is, is if he is sneaking around watching porn, he isn't planning on stopping anytime soon.. I am sure he is addicted to his hand.. if thats the case then get a camera and record him without him knowing and find out what he likes and how he does it... then you try that on him... I wish you luck! There is no reason he can't have sex with you... I am sure you could rock his world if he would just let you!
 
I can't just do what they do in the porno. All his pron I mean all of it is threesomes. Two chicks. like at least 99.9 percent..
 
that's not too bad. What we meant though is that when he's watching some porn, start getting all sexual with him...then you can fuck him while you're BOTH watching the porn.

You could even bring a female you found (someone you wouldn't have to see again, but you find attractive, and reckon he would too) to join in the fun, if you're not totally against the idea - how long you been with him?

If you really love him, just use your imagination, and turn him on!! Then he will fuck you, and can get out of the habit of touching himself to porn all the time - that's him hiding in his mancave...you can enter into the cave if you give him sexual treats, and he will be more likely to be enticed out if they're out of the norm from what you guys have had before.
 
I like do all that.
1. he watches his porn in private i always find out after then it causes a big fight bc he never trys shti with me.
2. sometimes if i et in the mood ill ask him if he wants us to watch a porno. EPIC fail his response.... * i want you not a porno alia* <-- samereaction for a threesome.
 
The only way I see this changing is if he stops watching porn and jacking off before you guys have sex.

It seems to me he has a serious addiction to porn. Like he honestly can't control himself. So I don't know maybe therapy will help or something.

Honestly though if stopped jerking off for like a day or two and you guys fucked it would be a done deal.
 
Wait, -Kitten, I'm confused. You had another thread going a while ago that you caught your BF cheating. Is this a new guy?
 
The problem is quite obviously him, he is jacking off and watching porn, if he stopped doing that, then his problems would go away. If he is unwilling to stop his behaviour that's causing negative consequences for you, then he is being selfish, and I think you should move on.
If he was jacking off, but was still capable of giving you the intimacy you require, then the masturbation would be acceptable, but the moment his masturbation, his pleasure, takes total precedence over your needs, affecting you negatively, that's pure selfishness.
All he need do is stop masturbating.
If he is lying about it, then I don't think he wants to stop, not ever will.

You can have much better, in my opinion without knowing the FULL FACTS, I would say dump his sorry ass, for not looking after your needs, even occasionally.
 
Antecessor said:
The problem is quite obviously him, he is jacking off and watching porn, if he stopped doing that, then his problems would go away. If he is unwilling to stop his behaviour that's causing negative consequences for you, then he is being selfish, and I think you should move on.
If he was jacking off, but was still capable of giving you the intimacy you require, then the masturbation would be acceptable, but the moment his masturbation, his pleasure, takes total precedence over your needs, affecting you negatively, that's pure selfishness.
All he need do is stop masturbating.
If he is lying about it, then I don't think he wants to stop, not ever will.

You can have much better, in my opinion without knowing the FULL FACTS, I would say dump his sorry ass, for not looking after your needs, even occasionally.
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This pretty much sums up my thoughts.
 
-kitten, I am slightly confused with this whole thread because in a thread that's a few down from this one entitled "asexual," you make a statement that says something like "I think I am asexual. I have zero desire for sex." If you have zero desire for sex, then why are you worried about why your boyfriend isn't fucking you?
 
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Lysis said:
Wait, -Kitten, I'm confused. You had another thread going a while ago that you caught your BF cheating. Is this a new guy?
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Same guy. I keep giving more chances.... -_- pathetic i know

Antecessor said:
The problem is quite obviously him, he is jacking off and watching porn, if he stopped doing that, then his problems would go away. If he is unwilling to stop his behaviour that's causing negative consequences for you, then he is being selfish, and I think you should move on.
If he was jacking off, but was still capable of giving you the intimacy you require, then the masturbation would be acceptable, but the moment his masturbation, his pleasure, takes total precedence over your needs, affecting you negatively, that's pure selfishness.
All he need do is stop masturbating.
If he is lying about it, then I don't think he wants to stop, not ever will.

You can have much better, in my opinion without knowing the FULL FACTS, I would say dump his sorry ass, for not looking after your needs, even occasionally.
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I know. THIS is what i've been saying to him and thinking all along... but he doesnt quit. im fully considering leaving him but that would make me the third woman to leave him for the same issue. just yesterday when i was fully honest and said if he cant do effort then im out the door he hand a nervouse break down....so idk what to do


littlepenguin said:
-kitten, I am slightly confused with this whole thread because in a thread that's a few down from this one entitled "asexual," you make a statement that says something like "I think I am asexual. I have zero desire for sex." If you have zero desire for sex, then why are you worried about why your boyfriend isn't fucking you?
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Meh. I said " I think i might be asexual " and mayne i am. I dont have the attraction or desire to people. but i have desire for love and passion when i have sex with him its the only time i can get it truely... he really shows it. i have the desire for that connectuion and special feeling. tbh i dont get much pleasure its all mental... other than that i dont care. if i didnt love him i wouldnt fuck him or anyone really. so idk.
 
He cheated on you and now he is choosing porn over you. He needs to go. End of story.

That is all.
 
i really think you need to get out of this relationship. you're considering giving up a huge part of life just so you won't be the third girl who left him because he prefers porn to sex? AND he cheated on you? there's way too much life out there for you to sell yours short for such a small payoff.

you might feel bad for a couple weeks after the breakup, but honestly i think you'd find more relief than remorse.
 
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