I wish I knew what I want from you. You're so independent and self-contained, you make me laugh and you treat me well but you keep your cards very close to your chest, so I do too. You never compliment me or make me feel like I mean a lot to you, but you text me almost every day and we see each other at least once a week and we have dinner and a good chat and we fuck. You are almost shy around me every time we meet, we're like mates when we hang out but then you cuddle me all night when we go to sleep together. You try to figure out what music I like so you can play it, and you ask what I look for in a man, if I want to see you more often, what I like to do in bed. At the same time you keep reminding me we're not dating and you don't introduce me to some of your friends; I know we met at a sex party but so what? My job is more respectful than yours; no one will ever guess. But then there's me: I didn't invite you to my birthday meal with my friends, I avoid every serious question you ask me which might lead to a "where is this going" discussion. I enjoy being around you, but seeing you too often confuses me. Maybe we're both just too fucked up to allow ourselves to be together... or maybe we're just not in love.
she has no idea what kind of womanizer and monster you are, and I hope she doesn't suffer. Thank god I dumped you douche bag!
