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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

Random MSN Gibberings LXXV: This subforum can be so entertaining (allegedly)

Mailmonkey said:
Stag weekend? The best man will have ensured there will be someone tagging along with a supply for everyone to chip in for surely?
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Maybe - bit of a mixed crowd though I think. I'll be youngest there by a few years and I'm well into my dotage (33). The stag said there should be some coke on offer but don't want to risk it. I need a stim at the end of a long day's drinking!
 
I need sex/romance bad. I've never been great at "pulling", although my longest relationship (15 years) was a girl I stared at, like a psycho, in a student's union. The others were my mate's ex and a friend of a friend I was set up with.

I run out patience fast with girls who don't respond. If you are looking at someone else while I'm talking, fuck you, if you can't be arsed I can't be arsed. This strategy does not seem to work well but that's how I am.

I shy away from adult friend finder type sites. Call me prejudiced but I don't want to go to bed with skanks. I'm probably prejudiced.

Any ideas? I could do with kissing and cuddling TONIGHT. It's been about a year I think. My post history provides a personal description. PM me your phone number and a pic if you're within 20 miles of Edinburgh. I'll come and get you.
 
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I never found it easy either to be honest Knockando... Got lucky in that a girl I'd been friends with for years and never really thought about that way fell in love with me at the precise time I fell in love with her...

How old are you? Rather than going on those seedy websites try joining some non-drug related group activities. When I lived in Abu Dhabi I joined an Am-Dram group and at my first audition pulled this incredibly attractive Filipina. Got the part as well...

EDIT: Oh hang on - you want sex? Then ignore all the above...
 
I'm 38. Yeah I like cycling and thought about joining a cycling club. But I want it tonight!


Arnold, I would, but your politics are all wrong!

Come on Sam, I know you've got something for me.
 
I could go to a club. But I can't be arsed. It means getting dressed up and dealing with morons. I'd rather sort it out in the queue before going in and just go straight back to mine, or preferably hers so I don't have to hoover.

Also I'm on my own, I've been to clubs alone before but it can be a bit nerve wracking and stressful.

Prostitutes are a serious option but I'd rather it was a mutual thing rather than buyer/seller.
 
I feel like what you are asking for is beyond what a few idiots hanging about on a drug forum on a friday night are able to offer...

My advice at this stage is to have a quick, bitter wank over some porn. That should temporarily alleviate the craving...

(it works for me)
 
The dial a girlfriend shit doesn't exist dude, you go to whine and dine then make loads of compliments before the bitch will allow you to spunk on her tits.
 
JedTheHumanoid said:
I feel like what you are asking for is beyond what a few idiots hanging about on a drug forum on a friday night are able to offer...

My advice at this stage is to have a quick, bitter wank over some porn. That should temporarily alleviate the craving...

(it works for me)
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A quick wank is a possibility. I'm going to check what clubs are on in my town tonight, thing is I usually go to clubs for music not for the meat market aspect, so it would involve paying to listen to music I detest and dressing up in a way totally at odds with my normal style. Also the clubs here aren't the best....
 
Get a minicab and go to a proper place, The local numpty market won't have much to offer.
 
Arnold said:
Get a minicab and go to a proper place, The local numpty market won't have much to offer.
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Thing is the local numpty market does seem to have loads of pretty girls! I've been a couple of times and nearly pulled but I think I came on a bit strong (within five minutes: "Fuck this, let's go back to mine, I've got loads of drugs and good music.")
 
Good luck Knockando. Just a bit worried you might end up spending a fortune and having a shit night. Might be best to have an early night and plan something properly for tomorrow...

If the local club has attractive girls though then you may as well give it a spin. I'd come back to yours for a load of drugs... Not sure I'm what you are after though; my hairy back might be off-putting for you.
 
JedTheHumanoid said:
Good luck Knockando. Just a bit worried you might end up spending a fortune and having a shit night. Might be best to have an early night and plan something properly for tomorrow...
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Supposed to be visiting a pal tomorrow night. He lives in the middle of nowhere, there is one pub in the village but you'd think it was just someone's house if you didn't know. Many houses have Red Hand of Ulster flags. In any case he refuses to leave his house.

It pisses me off, I've made a serious attempt to convince my long term on-off girlfriend to make it ON but she thinks she's going through a mid-life crisis and can't decide. I thought it was men who had these crises. Plus whenever I see her the painters are in.

I've got to the stage where I'm considering female relatives but there is no-one close to my age, because I was born when my parents were quite old. My eldest avaialble younger second-cousin-twice-removed is 17 years younger than me and the youngest older relative is 20 years older. My brother's wife is an option, I like her a lot, but my brother is still alive.

Think I might just go out for a wander in the back streets.
 
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If ya still going to a local club...the following contains nuts.. but read on........

A good ploy would be to first check the place you're going to out on facebook, Check every profile of a spunkable bird out,there is always one who will have set all her privacy settings to public allowing you to sift through and memorize it then go to the club and see if you recognise anyone with your new found nutty facebook stalking obsession.You've now got loads of material to break the ice and keep the bint interested!
Success guaranteed :)
You might run the risk of being put down as a bit of a fruitcake but hey that's the risk you have to be willing to take if you don't wan to go down the route of one in the hand....
 
Arnold said:
If ya still going to a local club...the following contains nuts.. but read on........

A good ploy would be to first check the place you're going to out on facebook, Check every profile of a spunkable bird out,there is always one who will have set all her privacy settings to public allowing you to sift through and memorize it then go to the club and see if you recognise anyone with your new found nutty facebook stalking obsession.You've now got loads of material to break the ice and keep the bint interested!
Success guaranteed :)
You might run the risk of being put down as a bit of a fruitcake but hey that's the risk you have to be willing to take if you don't wan to go down the route of one in the hand....
Click to expand...


Interesting. It sounds like a strategy! If I can find a local club which has a facebook page I'll be surprised as the internet is fairly new here but I'll have a look!
 
Ha this threads got a bit creepy, somehow without sam, just grab yaself a prossie, minimal work and everybody wins except your wallet

Bawls i spent all my rent money on rum, im starting to think quitting opis has turned me into a budding alcy :p
 
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