Random Acts of kindness.

[placebonaut]

My main thing is to give people I know my unconditional time, it's always on their terms and there if they want it rather than forced on them, but I let people know I'm there should they need me. It manifests itself in a lot of different ways:- emotional support, agony aunt, life coach, professional development, mentoring, physical labor.

I never expect anything back in return, but take great pleasure and joy in watching people blossom or deal with problem or get better as a result.

People don't appreciate just how much this is a big investment for me, it takes a lot of time to do, and time is the most expensive thing in the world, it means I have to work longer hours as a result, and I need to do that in a way that doesn't reduce family time - at times it's mentally very hard on me as well, especially when helping people with mental issue or emotional turmoil (I feel their pain!).

I'm a working class person, but I'm lucky enough to be in a well paid job, however I've worked in the service industry, so my other big thing is treating all service and retail staff as humans, talking to them about real things, not being that dick customer. Just asking how their day is going and offering up an open bit of insight on my own day/life is a great ice breaker, helping them clear the table, opening a door for them when their hands are full, it's a little something that helps make what is a very tough job just a tiny bit easier.

As I get older, I also find myself comfy calling people out for being dicks, that's an act of kindness for other people who are around at the time and having to put up with their BS!

 

[KurtAurelius]

Hi lovely people

I hope you don’t mind me sharing a interaction I had today while litter picking, it was one of those life awakening almost transcendental experiences.

I’m just doing my thing and a guy comes up to me, and he compliments me for the litter picking, and I thank him. I don’t know how or why but we chat, and I must of chatted with him for 30 minutes. I have adhd and can’t stay still most of the time but I was almost transfixed.

I am too direct and too honest, very quickly I explain I’m litter pickling to deal with my mental health, and the guy tells about how he went for a cancer check and was gutted it wasn’t postive, explaining that it’d save all the repercussions of suicide.

He then shows me his 7 foot iguana (holy fuck right?) and he demonstrates such love and care for the animal. He says he used to work before being signed off, and that at his age (he was middle aged) he kind of feels angry about how little he has for how hard he works.

I felt so much towards him, but not only that did the interaction lift to me to such an unbelievable human experience. I may sound cooky and I am, Ive cold turkeyed stimulants, and I am overdoing it with chain smoking ganja etc so I’m all over the shop. But I’ve felt postive and hopeful, even through the expose writing I’ve been doing about how bad this world is, I have been the least suicidal and willing to do what I can for a long time.

There is enough of us to do something. Every moment is an opportunity to heal ourselves and spread energy. As cooky as that it is it seems real. I am so grateful I got to talk to this guy and the effect it had on me. I intend to keep going outside and holding my head high to talk if it comes. Everytime I’ve gotten something so valuable.

 

[aokorn]

I felt so much towards him, but not only that did the interaction lift to me to such an unbelievable human experience. I may sound cooky and I am, Ive cold turkeyed stimulants, and I am overdoing it with chain smoking ganja etc so I’m all over the shop. But I’ve felt postive and hopeful, even through the expose writing I’ve been doing about how bad this world is, I have been the least suicidal and willing to do what I can for a long time.

I think it's great that some of us receive validation. I also feel validated in my actions sometimes. Perhaps some people receive validation more often than others, and some perhaps never. I feel sorry for the latter. I think everyone has remarkable characteristics and qualities within them.

Perhaps it is time that all of us (myself included) who know ourselves and know that we are good believe in ourselves so much that we do not need external validation. That is the right kind of validation. The one that comes from within. External validation is good, but internal validation is better. External validation is too rare and unreliable.

I am already practicing diligently, and I can tell you that I have already achieved some success in this direction.

Follow my example—but don't overdo it..

 

[notsmokeymcpot42088]

I have randomly spared some people who I shoulda messed up. That counts right.

Pay it forward - actually dont. Them ppl woulda been better off with the asskicking --- cant teach everyone though
(And I say that as someone who has learned valuable lessons from an asswhooping)

Last time I was at walmart I helped an old lady reach and pull down cat litter from the top shelf (Brilliant placement!). Wasnt really random though she was old and needed help and I was there....well kinda random.

 

[Zopiclone bandit]

I must also say that the driver drove very carefully, with commitment, skill, and attentiveness, and we arrived on time. This is not necessarily the case with local drivers.

Some of the stuff the old Priest has told me from most of his life in India is insane, he laughed so hard when I moaned about UK drivers.
Indian drivers DON'T blast their horn in anger like we do in the UK, USA & Europe, they blast it to let the person in front know they are about to be overtaken by someone.
It's equal to someone in the West shouting out the window "Watch out I'm coming up really fast on your ass & don't pull out for a moment as it'll kill me, thank you for hearing my horn"

 

[Zopiclone bandit]

I held the door open for a woman the other day coming out of the dispensary & she seemed genuinely shocked that anybody would do that.

I was perplexed & just told her "yeah I grew up in the South (USA) & it's just normal manners to hold the door open for some one behind you".
I always hold the door open for people, it ain't even a hard thing to do. Especially if it's a woman.

I do the same 100% of the time & I also get the same reaction most of the time, people seem shocked when you do this.
I was raised Old School Black Country which is very close to what you are getting at about being raised in The South, it's basic manners, not being an idiot or making life harder for others.

I keep this in mind as much as possible "Life is hard enough as it is, why add extra burdens to someone?"

A few days ago I was walking back & a woman's dog was on a loose lead, one of those extending leads

The dog came running upto me & the woman was screaming the dogs name & it took no notice of her, it jumped up all over me & wanted to play, the woman was so worried & pissed off at the dog. I just looked at her as she said "sorry" for the 4th time & laughed, I looked her DIRECT in the eye & said "Relax, that's what dogs do, it wants to say hello & play" I made a fuss of it & she broke out into a smile & we both laughed, she walked off with a smile on her face.

People seem to have a default setting of everything is bad, if a dog goes upto a stranger & wants to play that person will be MAD as hell etc, I do admit many years on Smack hasn't made me look like I am a very approachable human but it's not good to judge a person on their looks

 

[Zopiclone bandit]

challenging work that could lead to compassion fatigue

So many things are going through my head that I could post in reply to this but I am sure all of them would get me banned from here.

 

[notsmokeymcpot42088]

I do the same 100% of the time & I also get the same reaction most of the time, people seem shocked when you do this.
I was raised Old School Black Country which is very close to what you are getting at about being raised in The South, it's basic manners, not being an idiot or making life harder for others.

I keep this in mind as much as possible "Life is hard enough as it is, why add extra burdens to someone?"

A few days ago I was walking back & a woman's dog was on a loose lead, one of those extending leads

The dog came running upto me & the woman was screaming the dogs name & it took no notice of her, it jumped up all over me & wanted to play, the woman was so worried & pissed off at the dog. I just looked at her as she said "sorry" for the 4th time & laughed, I looked her DIRECT in the eye & said "Relax, that's what dogs do, it wants to say hello & play" I made a fuss of it & she broke out into a smile & we both laughed, she walked off with a smile on her face.

People seem to have a default setting of everything is bad, if a dog goes upto a stranger & wants to play that person will be MAD as hell etc, I do admit many years on Smack hasn't made me look like I am a very approachable human but it's not good to judge a person on their looks

Shoot when the weather is nice I sit outside of the dispensary on the bench and open the door for ppl coming in -- I have had to tell ppl I dont work there ya can't tip me. Well I coulda just took the money but ya know -- I could lose my bench sitting privelages lol

 

[Zopiclone bandit]

The people next door have cut down all the old Brambles (Rubus fruticosus) which are a True Nightmare to deal with when they have been growing for a few years, they all had a stem just like this!!!!!!

Also 6 of the Fence Panels on my side of the garden were totally rotten & were falling apart, the guy had saved some from a job he had earlier on in the day where the people had tossed out loads that were fine, they were tossing them out because they simply didn't need them anymore, to save them going to waste or going up in flames he brought them back & dropped them in place for me too. When you take into account a SINGLE 6ft by 3ft panel costs £32.60 (U.S. $43.89) that would be a total of £195.60 (U.S.263.45)

The Garden looks so much better now with it all being cut back, as he chopped back the Brambles I did some more work & it now looks like a Garden & not a lost part of The Amazon Jungle or some part of the Jungle in Cambodia.

 

[Zopiclone bandit]

Well I coulda just took the money but ya know -- I could lose my bench sitting privelages lol

You have earned those bench sitting privelages & you'll be mad to give 'em up just for a few George Washington's.


For some reason as I typed a reply to you Matt Dillon came to mind in the movie Drugstore Cowboy & that's how I kinda picture you.

 

[Zopiclone bandit]

Shoot when the weather is nice I sit outside of the dispensary on the bench

 

[notsmokeymcpot42088]

^Shoot I can't get away with a ciggy or a vape. (Yes I could I just don't make any effort to conceal).

Dream life hanging out on the dispensary bench with a fat bag of dope -- hell I'll valet and do security. (Gotta pay for that dope)

 

[streaM Freak]

^Shoot I can't get away with a ciggy or a vape. (Yes I could I just don't make any effort to conceal).

Dream life hanging out on the dispensary bench with a fat bag of dope -- hell I'll valet and do security. (Gotta pay for that dope)

I ended up dropping out because too much testosterone surrounded me, but I was pledging a frat and the best dutie was being a driver. All night id just smoke weed out of this upperclassman nice car and pick up chicks from dorms, drop them off, smoke more weed on the way to the next place, drive to the strip club, pick up some homies, smoke more weed, was the life. That was my favorite part of pledging.

Same with drumline in high school. I was the section leader when we won our first winter championship - what was our secret? Smoking fatties after each competition then getting sour patch kids and shitting around in the stands watching the other performances.

 

[notsmokeymcpot42088]

Haha congratulations!! In a similar experience when I was playing hockey the league kept track of how many goals you had -- I kept track of when I smoked pot. Statistically I got twice as many goals when I smoked before the game.
This was quite the opposite in baseball however!

That sounds like a pretty sweet life alright -- frat guys aren't my favorite ppl but they do be tossing money around and getting into interesting situations. College was a great experience, too bad I didnt learn much! (Not true)

I will totally take being pictured as matt dillon in drugstore cowboys as a compliment. (Morality issues aside) -- Grazi!

actually you aren't far off I can't count the amount of times "The white van" showed up carrying loads and loads of w/e dispensary products and I was feelin a bit like dillon in drugstore cowboys each time

 

[streaM Freak]

Haha congratulations!! In a similar experience when I was playing hockey the league kept track of how many goals you had -- I kept track of when I smoked pot. Statistically I got twice as many goals when I smoked before the game.
This was quite the opposite in baseball however!

That sounds like a pretty sweet life alright -- frat guys aren't my favorite ppl but they do be tossing money around and getting into interesting situations. College was a great experience, too bad I didnt learn much! (Not true)

I could see baseball being hard. At least batting and defense. Pitching might be fun.

Yeah some guys swore by getting high before playing lacrosse. I can't function well when I smoke I use it more as an exploratory time for my feelings and perspective

 

[notsmokeymcpot42088]

Batting it was actually alright for --- I played (most) of the sports and generally speaking my discovery was if the sport was something that completely sucked my brain into it (I.E hockey, your mind wanders you suffer physical pain quickly) than pot seemed to be a big help.

Baseball, especially fielding --- Most of the time you are doing nothing. Most plays dont involve you at all ---- so I found my brain wandering or just a bit of boredom setting in -- and that is the second the ball finally shows up!

Lacrosse is alot like hockey so I am going to guess this is very anectdotal and person by person

 

[streaM Freak]

Ah i see. Yeah, outfield makes total sense reminds me of some movie scenes, or even modern-day MLB

 

[notsmokeymcpot42088]

Haha I was at second base or pitching -- pitching it was alright with cuz you kinda gotta lock in as the pitcher and I found the pyschological game fun. Never got developed as a pitcher seriously though as that was the coaches kids spot almost always.

Second base gets way too much action to be asleep at the wheel! I feel like I coulda got away with it in the outfield honestly.... Don't have the arm though. They wanted me on shortstop but i get reinnods(Sp) when its cold my fingers go numb / lose circulation -- gripping and throwing a ball becomes rather impossible..... LOL I could underhand it in from second if i REALLY HAD TO usually.... Not much talent here; I was on the 'all star' tournament team -- and quit cuz it was a coaches kid club.

I should not have been good at baseball, rarely hit the ball past the infield. Got hit with more pitches than anyone else on the team consistently (For a couple reasons) -- Walked prolly over half the time at bat. Was the teams best "Bunter" and had a unique confidence (KNOWLEDGE) that if I put the ball in play AT ALL there was a good chance of an error and me making it to first!

reallly my main thing as a pitcher was "Throw the ball over the plate" -- most ppl couldnt seem to do that for the life of em. (Again low talent area -- we got SQUASHED regionally lol)

Slow runner -- still stole more bases than most people -- same concept. "Im going and I don't believe the catcher can throw to second without an error" -- I play second, I catch alot of those balls from the catcher (Or watch them fly over my head about half the time)

 

[Ki3ly]

​

@Zopiclone bandit on a ' good ' day !!!

​

It's all witchcraft to me. Just Kidding.
I Bruv u Loh. Bou Yad.

 

[DeathIndustrial88]

I do the same 100% of the time & I also get the same reaction most of the time, people seem shocked when you do this.
I was raised Old School Black Country which is very close to what you are getting at about being raised in The South, it's basic manners, not being an idiot or making life harder for others.

I keep this in mind as much as possible "Life is hard enough as it is, why add extra burdens to someone?"

A few days ago I was walking back & a woman's dog was on a loose lead, one of those extending leads

The dog came running upto me & the woman was screaming the dogs name & it took no notice of her, it jumped up all over me & wanted to play, the woman was so worried & pissed off at the dog. I just looked at her as she said "sorry" for the 4th time & laughed, I looked her DIRECT in the eye & said "Relax, that's what dogs do, it wants to say hello & play" I made a fuss of it & she broke out into a smile & we both laughed, she walked off with a smile on her face.

People seem to have a default setting of everything is bad, if a dog goes upto a stranger & wants to play that person will be MAD as hell etc, I do admit many years on Smack hasn't made me look like I am a very approachable human but it's not good to judge a person on their looks

Exactly! It's just basic manners. No need to make life harder for anyone else when you already know what it's like.
I do have exceptions though. Like there's been a few times where I live, where this black woman will see me & my partner carry in grocery & instead of holding the security door open as she comes out, she just let's it shut behind her every single time. So then we have to get our key with bags of groceries on our arms to unlock the damn door. So I've stopped holding the door open for that woman. lol

I actually had kind of an opposite experience recently. Some lesbian chicks living here owned this big ass black dog. Always yelling at it & treating it like shit. Three different times that fricken dog got loose from their grip & ran over & jumped all over me. Even scratchs some of my clothes, which pissed me off. But I wasn't mad at the dog. I was mad at it's owners for being so pathetic. Like, if you can't hang on to your dog because he's that big & you aren't strong enough, then maybe you shouldn't have a big ass dog that you can't control. The dog also looked like it wanted to get away from this lady honestly. lol I felt kinda bad for it cause when I went to put my arm up to unlock the security door, it cowered back like it was afraid I was gonna hit it. Which tells me this chicks probably abuse the shit out of that dog & it's probably trying to get away from their asses.

I try to do nice things for people, but I do get into moods where I just get tired of everyone & want nothing to do with the world around me if it involves other humans. People can be just awful, selfish, self-centered, arrogant, etc....So you gotta have a balance.