Rain Dance- Please critique

[PoetessAurora]

A solidary leaf flicked and fluttered across the pavement under the halo of a street lamp. It glistened, wet from the heavy rain moments earlier. No other source of movement could be found in the parking lot. There was only this single leaf, waltzing around in the chilly air. The leaf was free as a kite in the sky, bouncing and spiralling.

Then the rain began to drizzle again, but the leaf took no notice. It continued to dance mindlessly amist the falling droplets of water. Slowly the rain became heavier, dampening the leaf. With all it's might, the leaf tried to remain in the air but the rain was much too strong. At last the leaf lay down on the smooth pavement and let the rain beat against it, bitter and alone. The leaf had become exhausted.

Looking up, the sky was black without a star or moon to shed light on the scene. There was only a canvas of emptiness staring back. The leaf closed it's eyes, hoping to sleep forever. Or at least until the rain ended.

 

[Rollingrrl]

don't know if i interpreted this as you meant for when you wrote it but i took it as a symbolic piece. and as I was reading it, I felt kinship with the leaf and I was like, yeah that's like life. The rain being bad times and all of that, beating us down and all. I liked the imagery a lot! good job!

~Shelly~

*does exotic belly dance*

 

[PoetessAurora]

Thanks.