Dissociatives Promise on the mountain: My breakup with dissociatives

[Ballz_Trippington]

I was scared to make this post, knowing the dirty looks I would get from people for getting rid of all that MXE...

I'm proud that you made such a post!!!
To be perfectly honest, I have a nice supply of pre-ban MXE that I will very likely never use.
It seems that MXE just DOES lose its magic after you have a lovely honeymoon period with it.
Since 2020 every time I've taken my usual dose of MXE (which is less than once a month by far) I just feel uncomfortably disassociated and unable to verbally talk without sounding completely retarded for a good 8 hours.
Now, O-PCE still puts me in a hole 100% of the time and I'm back to baseline in a several hours so in my opinion O-PCE is the Holy Grail of disso's.
Even mixing MXE and O-PCE has no synergy....somehow MXE just makes me feel lost,dysphoric and stupid.
And this is the exact same batch from back in the day that was purely magickal!!!!
Stored in a cold storage facility in amber glass vial so I know it has not degraded.
Just very strange but I have no more love for MXE ND have also considered disposing of what I have left though a large part of me feels like thst would be utter blasphemy....the other part of me thinks it's probably the best thing to do.

 

[emkee_reinvented]

I'm proud that you made such a post!!!
To be perfectly honest, I have a nice supply of pre-ban MXE that I will very likely never use.
It seems that MXE just DOES lose its magic after you have a lovely honeymoon period with it.
Since 2020 every time I've taken my usual dose of MXE (which is less than once a month by far) I just feel uncomfortably disassociated and unable to verbally talk without sounding completely retarded for a good 8 hours.
Now, O-PCE still puts me in a hole 100% of the time and I'm back to baseline in a several hours so in my opinion O-PCE is the Holy Grail of disso's.
Even mixing MXE and O-PCE has no synergy....somehow MXE just makes me feel lost,dysphoric and stupid.
And this is the exact same batch from back in the day that was purely magickal!!!!
Stored in a cold storage facility in amber glass vial so I know it has not degraded.
Just very strange but I have no more love for MXE ND have also considered disposing of what I have left though a large part of me feels like thst would be utter blasphemy....the other part of me thinks it's probably the best thing to do.

My personal use as a allrounder. it was a stim an a disso and very good antidepressant. Easili to aim for sub hole doses especially when some tolerance started up.

The stress i was under att was immense. It helped me through, I will go as far to say it saved my live, may times. The bad times!

 

[Listening]

There are a ton of details that I didn't mention in my story. Once MXE lost its magic (which was very early for me), I too found other dissociatives to have much better effects for my needs. I loved O-PCE, but I would end up with pretty extreme lingering side-effects for many days after using it, so I didn't touch it after a while. Towards the end I mostly used 3-meo-pcp.

 

[Ballz_Trippington]

My personal use as a allrounder. it was a stim an a disso and very good antidepressant. Easili to aim for sub hole doses especially when some tolerance

My personal use as a allrounder. it was a stim an a disso and very good antidepressant. Easili to aim for sub hole doses especially when some tolerance started up.

The stress i was under att was immense. It helped me through, I will go as far to say it saved my live, may times. The bad times!

I am extremely disciplined and responsible with my drug use and mostly kept my disso use to once per month....but in December 2020 my cat that I had for 18 years got very sick and passed away on Dec 27th of that year.
I knew that he wasn't going to make it and my disassociate use went up to every weekend that month and I absolutely needed it to get through thst period of my life.
But I remember being absolutely high as fuck on mxe and o-pce the day after he passed on the 28th and I just realized that I was just done with dissociative. They served their purpose and no longer serve a positive purpose in my life.
Honestly, except for weed which I have a legit prescription for I haven't touched any drugs since new years eve and haven't had the slightest desire too.
I definitely still think fondly my memories of coming up on o-pce to Tibetan chanting and having a glorious hole but I'm happy living with just the memories and can't see myself ever dipping back into the dissociative sauce.

 

[Ballz_Trippington]

There are a ton of details that I didn't mention in my story. Once MXE lost its magic (which was very early for me), I too found other dissociatives to have much better effects for my needs. I loved O-PCE, but I would end up with pretty extreme lingering side-effects for many days after using it, so I didn't touch it after a while. Towards the end I mostly used 3-meo-pcp.

I found o-pce to be the perfect disso actually becsuse of the lack of lingering effects....I found thst as long I only dose once and hole but don't redose then the effects only last a couple hours and you hole very shortly after dosing (rectally) and the are back in reality after about 45 mins of the initial dose and back to baseline after about 4-6 hours with nobody even noticing that you took anything.
However, if I redose o-pce fir a 2nd hole after the first one I will be groggy and feel fucked up well into the next day...but it was just perfect for me at a single rectal dose of 40mg.
It's lovely and absolutely cosmic material but that entire class of drugs is just not for me anymore either.
I have too many responsibilities and too little free time and really just want to focus on making my life less stressful and less complicated... not being fucked up regularly has made my life quest much easier to navigate towards.

 

[ecstacylover]

I always wonder if I should give O-PCE another chance, given how much people seem to like it, as I didn't really push the doses when I had it and also had a high tolerance back when I tried it. But then I think maybe not, I tried multiple batches when it first came out and it always left me with a bad headache into the next day. It was quite cold and clinical for me, like a more dissociating and retarding version of 3-MeO-PCP. I generally find (N=2, so perhaps not enough to call it a trend) that removing the aryl subs (e.g. DCK, O-PCE) makes for a much more retarding experience.

Thanks for your experience @Listening, it really resonates with me. Disso abuse can have a ton of nasty psychological effects, it made me severely prone to panic, paranoia, and hypochondriac and negative thought patterns in general. Big picture I think it can be helpful though, as I think it's helped me come to terms with existential crisis sort of stuff, as well as general motivation and interest towards information-gathering.

I started with DXM around 2010 and then got into 3-MeO-PCP in late 2014 to early 2015. 2015-2016 I was doing MXE almost daily. Then around 2017 I made a concerted effort to start using less and its been a gradual process of using them less and less, although when I do use I like to go for 3-4 days in a row.

I think the longest I went was around 8 months without using any, back in 2019. Currently I'm at 7 months and I feel the most sane I've felt in years, not many negative patterns of thought at all, but I do want an experience soon just to clear the mental detritus and re-sculpt the ol' parallel processor towards a more motivated configuration.