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Poppy Seed Tea Withdrawal Is Hell

Hey Gollum, I kept a headache for awhile, also the back. It sucked but it did go away. I don?t know how different the withdrawls are methadone vs PST but it took 50 days or so before I felt decent. I lived on Tylenol ibuprofen and tiger balm. Was beginning to think it was my ?normal?, but today I woke feeling refreshed. It?ll get there.
Spring is near, you will feel great this summer. Days go by, it seems forever. Mine did, but after 3 weeks I thought this is ENOUGH already. Push on!
 
@Debbie: Good to hear from you. Awesome job on staying sober and sticking with the recovery! So impressive and very proud of you.

I agree that the 3 week mark is kind of milestone. It seems like up until that point you have a hard time convincing yourself that you can beat the addiction and it's a razor's edge between success and failure. But then it's like something inside wakes up and shakes off the drug effects and says no more, I am done with this shit running my life. I can distinctly remember laying on the couch during my last WD feeling sorry for myself when it hit me. And, you're right, it is a 2 or 3 month period before you really realize that you have achieved "normal" again.
 
I wish you all the best.I still remember the horror of my January withdrawals and the motivation, that I got from your journals. I had multiple Cold turkey withdrawals for almost all of 2018. It was a perpetual agony.One month use, stop, start again .A sinister ritual. I still get sweaty under my arms, when i get nervous or go out.I never had this problem before.Thank you for sharing Imagollum.
 
iamgollum, this morning, I read scriptures, prayed, cried, begged for help. Wanted to go get a big diet drink full of caffeine so I could move, but didn't. I ripped off all of the sheets on my bed because clean sheets make me feel better and I want them tonight. I vacuumed the house. Did laundry. Threw on boots and a coat and gloves and went out into the beautifully sunny day full of snow and hiked up as far as I could and again, sat and prayed and cried and begged for help. Hiked all the way down and walked around the neighborhood to get some exercise. Came in and started cleaning again. Cleaned the basement. More laundry. (My daughter is making dinner and hub still won't be home so it doesn't matter what we eat). Just laid on a big chair and I actually felt tired! Thought I better get a Propel for some electrolytes and come read the forum since I can't stand to watch TV or look at my phone or anything else. Many things came to me today. Scriptures popped up into my head that helped. Also, realizing that others have it so much worse. I have a husband, family, extended family, beautiful, healthy body that works perfectly, I don't have to worry about going to a job for the next couple of months while my brain and body heal, I know that there is purpose in this and in life. Everything I have gone through has made me a better person and given me more compassion. I know I can get through this because of my deep faith. I have gone through some really difficult things, as we all have, (especially everyone on this forum) and the really difficult things just make you that much better of a person. One of the scriptures that came to me today was this...And if you should be cast into the pit, or into the hand of murderers, and the sentence of death passes upon thee, if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee, if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all; if the very jaws of hell shall gape open its mouth wide after thee, know thou, that all thee things shall give thee experience and shall be for thy good.
The son of Man descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?
Therefore, hold on thy way and the priesthood shall remain with thee; for their bounds are set, they cannot pass. Thy days are known and thy years shall not be numbered less; therefore fear not what man can do, for God shall be with you forever and ever. It is the middle of day 9, I have had a strength within me today that has helped me know things will be okay eventually. You have been part of that. I have truly needed your advice and support. The world is a better place because of people like you iamgollum! You really do have a beautiful gift of writing. You should write a book about this. I'd buy it:). OH...I always forget to say to you. THE SNEEZING! It doesn't show that in all of the other side effects of codeine withdrawal. It must be just for the PST withdrawers. The first few days, I sneezed more times in a row in my entire life! Hoping once the sneezes stop, I'll know I'm on the mend!
 
Belamiable85 said:
I wish you all the best.I still remember the horror of my January withdrawals and the motivation, that I got from your journals. I had multiple Cold turkey withdrawals for almost all of 2018. It was a perpetual agony.One month use, stop, start again .A sinister ritual. I still get sweaty under my arms, when i get nervous or go out.I never had this problem before.Thank you for sharing Imagollum.
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@Belamiable85: Thanks for the encouragement--means a lot and really helps. I'm glad my journey helped. Stay strong, stay focused.
 
@8thday: That is fantastic! Exercise/activity is one of the best antidotes for withdrawal symptoms--releases natural endorphins, gives you a sense of accomplishment, and takes your mind off things. It is a good sign that you should see a light at the end of the tunnel soon which will get brighter each day. It is great that you have a strong belief system and strong family unit. Your faith will give you strength and purpose as you continue to recover. Your last post seems to be much more focused and positive which indicates your brain is starting to reboot. Your days will start to get much better, I really believe that.

You said that you used run marathons. Remember how you trained your mind/body for endurance, how you had to dig deep for those last couple of miles, the rush of adrenaline as you crossed the finish, the sense of accomplishment as you pinned up your runner number. Recovery is just like a marathon--it will take everything you have. Some parts of it will seem easy, others will seem difficult but you have to keep going because there is also a finish line--and you will know when you cross it. That marathon runner is still in there and she will be back soon. That is the person you are, not the the one whose been hiding behind the haze of drugs. You are stronger than a little black seed and you know that.

Very proud of you--getting up and moving takes a lot of motivation and will power during CT withdrawal, I know. It is an excellent first step in taking your life back. Well done--keep pushing forward. Tomorrow you'll be in double digits!

Also, glad I can help. There are a lot of really good people on Bluelight that are smarter and more experienced than I so don't hesitate to reach out to them with questions, if needed. You will get no judgement from anyone and only encouragement and suggestions.
 
Day 19. Rough night. Slept from 1:30-2:30 and 5-6 and then got up. I have decided I need to cut way back on the sleep meds since I am concerned I may be messing with my brain's attempt to rebalance and may be delaying natural sleep patterns from returning. I think I have convinced myself that I needed sleep to function and survive this kick, but I think it may just be because I have the meds readily available. The thing about the sleep drugs is that if you do not get 6-8 hours of decent sleep on them, you really don't feel much better than having no sleep at all--at least that is how they effect me. If I only get a few hours on them, I do feel more rested when I wake up, but it is short-lived and by early afternoon I just run out of gas and have trouble thinking. I made it a month with little to no sleep last WD and while I was not functioning very well most days--I did function. I think I need to try and avoid the meds until I absolutely cannot function. I remember at one point I started getting visual hallucinations (dark shadows out of the corners of my eyes) when I was completely sleep deprived so maybe that is a good signal to take something for sleep.

I have kind of a busy day ahead so I decided I needed a shot of coffee. I don't drink much caffeine anymore and we were out of the cheap coffee we usually have. I found an old bag of Starbucks in the cabinet and used it. Wow--I forgot what a caffeine buzz really felt like and I actually feel really good right now! No doubt I am going to pay for that later today when I crash, but my brain is probably the clearest it's been in the past 2 weeks right now. Actually, even before the coffee I felt pretty good even with the lack of sleep--probably has a lot to do with not having any hangover effects from a sleep med. No anxiety and attitude seems positive overall today even though I know I will be on my feet most of the day. Legs are kind of achy again and lower back/old injuries continue hurt but I have not had any OTC pain pills yet. Hopefully some Tylenol and Aleve will take the edge off.

23 degrees here this morning looking towards a high of 39 blazing degrees but...it looks like the sun may come out today which will be something new. Actually, I took the dog out last evening right at dusk and noticed that the clouds on the horizon had broken up and it was the most amazing sunset I had seen in a long time--reds, oranges, yellows. Even though it was cold and windy, I sat down on the porch for 20 minutes just to watch the sun go down. It has been a long time since I've done that. When I go back in, my wife asks what I was doing outside and I told her I was watching the sun go down. And, she says this "You used to do that a lot. You used to come in and get me to go watch it with you." I was speechless--I have no recollection of going in the house and dragging her out to watch a sunset. The last time I can even remember doing that with her was when we camped in the desert many years ago. So, unless I am early-Alzheimers (and I don't think I am) it means that I must have done it when I was high on the PST and that thought scares the living shit out of me. What else have I seen or experienced that I don't recall? I accepted that what I did or saw was filtered through a haze, but I was sure I remembered most everything. Sure I've seen photos of me I don't completely remember being taken, but I can kinda rememeber where. It was truly a revelation for me and even more reason to leave that part of my life behind I think. Sorry--don't mean to get too philosophical here. Just trying to convey that the reality we think we are experiencing during our binges may actually me fantasies. Probably not news to those who have been through this before.
 
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Loved your day 19. I love reading your insights and advice. I was thinking of trying to see a doc for Trazadone or something because my brain will not shut off at all own its own, after your post, I guess I won't. No sleep for me whatsoever. I took Gabapentin last night and it did stop the surges of hot and cold and the sweats but I don't think I even slept at hour and I think that makes me have even worse diarrhea. My brain feels fully awake all the time even though my body is exhausted. This is such an interesting and life changing experience. I was tempted to get out pain meds last night and take a fourth of a pill to see if it would just let me sleep. Is that a bad idea? I hate feeling so desperate for sleep. Been laying here for hours waiting for everyone to wake up. How long can we go with no sleep? I'm day 10 today and you are 9 ahead and still not sleeping. Have the hot and cold sweats and surges of heat and chills stopped for you completely? My heart rate is so high still all of the time, I can feel it pounding out of me as I try to sleep at night but can't. It's so strange because I have always had a rate in the 50s, sometimes 60s. Docs would always have to recheck my heart because it is so low and then they would ask if I was an athlete. I've always been really thin and in great shape. I thought I could kick this easier than being on here in the dark complaining to my only friend that can understand.
I love hearing about your wife and how you are realizing how much you have missed and how you have changed from the addiction. I hope to see some change soon for the better. Keep posting all of the time so I can read about how to deal with this. I guess I will do no meds again tomorrow night and want to pull my hair out and cry and feel sorry for myself taking 5 baths with no relief from the withdrawals. You are wonderful Iamgollum. You are so amazingly strong. you give me hope.
 
@8thday: Congrats on Day 10! Try not to get too concerned about the insomnia. When your body needs sleep it will take it. It may only be for a couple of hours or so, but it will happen. I know the lack of sleep makes it difficult to deal with the hell of WD, but it will start to get better. I have found that mornings are usually the worst for negative thoughts and anxiety: I am frustrated from not sleeping, I know I have to deal with the day ahead while feeling crappy, and I worry that I will just not be able to sleep again at the end of it. But, I've found that if I can get up and get going, the day usually is not as bad as I think it's going to be.

I still get occasional chills but that has mostly passed. Also, your body is in a tense state right now so the elevated HR is not unusual. As long as HR & BP does not get scary high or you have a heart condition, things should be fine. Try some deep breathing and think calming thoughts. Also, I don't think taking any type of opiate at this point would be a good idea. You are 10 days clean which means that your tolerance to them has started to lower--even a small amount might give you a mild opiate effect. I don't believe it would reset the cold turkey completely but it might create a temptation that you don't want or need right now. If it were me, I would give any and all pain meds you have in stock to someone you trust. Just my 2 cents--others on the forum may have a different view.

As for the Trazadone--I am not sure what to tell you. One of the moderators on Bluelight (CJ) who obviously knows his stuff has said that Traz does not do much during acute WD but again, everyone reacts differently to things. I have tried it, Lunesta, and Restoril during this kick and I think the Lunesta has worked the best as long as I don't take it every night for an extended time. Seroquel and Ativan are also heavy duty sleep meds but can have side effects as well. If you are into natural supplements, I know some people have had luck with Valerian Root and Melatonin. They did not work well for me, but once I was about a month into recovery last time I used 5-HTP and Natural Gaba which seemed to help me get to sleep. Just a suggestion--may want to do some Google research on those.

Hang in there--you are seriously doing great and I am still awed that you were able to go on vacation during CT--says so much about who you are and how strong you are. Be patient and things will improve. I am 10 days ahead of you in recovery and the clouds are really starting to clear for me (both literally and actually today!). Try to push yourself again as you did yesterday. As I've noted a couple of times above, with me there always seems to be an internal battle between my brain and body. My brain tells me I feel horrible and don't have the energy to do anything, but if I can push past that and get moving or focused on something, my body kind of takes over. It's a new day--don't just try to survive it, but enjoy it.
 
Iamgollum, made me cry. Feeling so low today and discouraged, I really needed those words. I really thought the exercise and keeping busy would shut this damn brain of mind down and NOTHING!!!! The hot flashes, sweating and chills all night are killing me! I'm DAY 10, why am I still having those horrible side effects? I should be done with that crap! Everything I read said 7-10 days at the most but insomnia could linger for up to 2 months. I was thinking insomnia as in having 4 hours of sleep a night not ZERO!!!! I'm kinda at the end of my rope. I guess I'll go get some 5-htp and gaba (not really sure what they are) don't feel like getting ready today or leaving. Have a sick, creepy anxiety all over me right now.

I really hope you have a great day. You are so incredibly tough and optimistic. Thank you.
 
@8thday: There are no hard and fast rules or averages when it comes to withdrawal. Some people recover slower than others and everyone reacts to it similarly, yet different. But it is not a permanent thing and there is life on the other side--that much I promise. You just have to lean into it as hard as you can. Dig deep--you are stronger than you know.

I do not have your deep faith but I have studied religion and theology. Get out your Bible and read about Job, Abraham, Daniel--a lot of good stories in there about those who were tested. I usually do not quote scripture but here is a good one that I think might help you today:

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance,” James 1:2-3.
 
gollum, Thank you for being there for me. This is one of the most difficult things I have done, probably by the end, the most difficult. Thank you for the scripture, made me cry. I know this journey of life brings so many difficulties that stretch you beyond what you ever thought possible. I've cried more this past week than the last couple of years since my dad passed. This might sound strange to you but so many times when I have felt the lowest, I swear, my dad has been with me.

I can tell you are educated. Must have majored in English? Or you are just incredibly gifted with writing. You are a multi-talented guy and by the way you give advice on here, you must be much needed and very loved at home. Your wife and kids are very lucky to have you!

I wish this fog in my head would clear and I had some energy. I am so hoping for some much needed sleep tonight, for both of us! Not sure if prayers will be answered in that way tonight, but they have been answered by bringing me to you. Thank you for more than you know.
 
@8thday: Sensing your Dad nearby is not strange at all--I think we all have guardian angels and they usually show up when we really need one.


I hope you got some sleep but if not, try not to worry about it too much--you really have no control over it at this point short of trying sleep aids. Your brain will figure it out soon and normal sleep will return. Did you have good sleep patterns before you started using the seed tea? If so, you will get them back. I have struggled with sleep my whole life--very light sleeper that has trouble getting to sleep and staying there. It is probably more of a shock to someone who has not experienced chronic insomnia before. I would probably give it a few more days and then suggest you talk to your doctor if it really concerns you. You might respond well to a sleep aid and it may help you deal with the recovery.

A lot of people on Bluelight swear by maintenance drugs to help with WD. Suboxone and Kratom were suggested to me as was Lyrica, Gabapentin, Clonidine, weed, even alcohol. It just seems to me that you may risk trading one addiction for another, but I have no experience to support that opinion. And, you have already made it 10 days CT. Seems like starting a detox treatment like suboxone or methadone at this point will only extend the time returning to normal. The advantage you have is that your husband knows what is going on and is being supportive--there is nothing to lose in going to your doctor and see if he can prescribe something for relief. Since my family did not know and my doctor is a personal friend, I chose to just deal with the agony of withdrawal alone rather than ask for help/support because I was so embarrassed and was afraid of what they would say--makes me sound especially shallow when I write it down like that. Guess we all have a certain amount of hubris...

Yes, I have spent a few years in school, but no English major. Writing is just something I have always been able to do ever since elementary school. But it's both a blessing and a curse--since I like to write it usually takes me a lot of words to get to the point sometimes...usually sounds OK, but brevity is not my strong suit. I've been published but nothing most people would want to read--mostly technical manuals and research papers. And, I have started writing a few fictional books, but since I have trouble relaxing and sitting still--it is hard for me to just sit and write. I always thought I would do more of it when I got older or retired, but decided to get hooked on drugs instead...I will say that the stuff I did write when using the tea was pretty wild. Not sure it was any good, but definitely creative. Probably why many of the great writers and artists in history were heavy drug users or drinkers. Something about the completely relaxed mind that just allows unrestrained creativity to flow. Regardless, I still don;t see that as justification to live life in an altered state.

Sorry for rambling (told you I like to write!). IMO I think you should just soldier on with your CT recovery. You have made it 11 days in cold turkey and while I know it seems like it will not end, it will. Search this forum and there are countless posts saying that it does end and life returns to what normal used to be before the drugs. I was clean for almost 6 months last time and at about 60 days can remember reading some of my early posts on this thread and thinking "Did I really write that? Did I really feel that bad?" Hard to believe my brain could minimize that living hell, but that's how the addict's brain works and why I've learned that sobriety has to be a lifelong commitment. I think up above somewhere I quoted someone who said "Once your a pickle, you can never be a cucumber again.". I love that--it's accurate, funny, and sad at the same time. But, I'm OK with that--I think I see myself as more of a hot and spicy pickle, rather than a Gherkin...Besides pickles are way more interesting than cucumbers anyway.

My grandmother used to say "Everyday is a gift--but some gifts are better than others". I hope today is one of the better gifts for you.
 
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Day 20--double, double digits. No sleep meds last night, and unsurprisingly, not much sleep either. I actually got up around 2am and went grocery shopping. Thought what the hell, we needed food and I obviously had a lot of time on my hands...What shocked me was the number of people shopping in the middle of the friggin' night. I had to actually wait in line to check out. Either we have a vampire problem in our neighborhood or there are a hell of a lot of people struggling with withdrawal insomnia. I suppose they could also work second or third shifts. But, I digress...I came home and managed to sleep about 1.5 hours on the couch and then got up and went out and rotated the tires on our vehicles. I usually don't do that myself, but my sleep therapist said to do mundane things when I can't sleep and that is about as boring a job as there is. I've been up ever since.

Definitely tired and can really feel the exhaustion in my legs since they are especially achy and feel like concrete today. Lower back, neck and shoulders do not hurt as bad today but I think it is because Iv'e been moving around most of the night. When I do actually sleep, it usually takes a while to get the kinks straightened out until I can get some Tylenol in me. As I have said a number of times above--it sucks getting old. But, I feel really positive today for some reason--I would even call it a good mood. We went to a comedy club last evening with my daughter and her friends and that was a really good time. Laughter and social settings are definitely good for recovery, I've found. Concentration still seems off, but that is partially due to my brain rebooting and partially to the lack of sleep, I am sure. While I would love some sleep, overall I would say I am feeling more myself today. With me, it seems that the 3 week mark in withdrawal is where I really turn a corner and things start improving at an increasing rate.

Also, I did something stupid yesterday--no, I did not relapse. I bought an old ultralight (small single person airplane) off of craigslist that needs rebuilt/restored. I decided I needed more exciting diversion than woodworking and for some strange reason the wife did not have a huge issue with it. Probably the life insurance policy. I used to really enjoy working on cars/motors back when you could actually work on them without a degree in electronics, so I thought what the hell. One way or another, I plan to fill my spare time to avoid relapse, or die trying. And, I've walked away from a plane crash before...on second thought, I was Medivac'ed away from that one. Meh, what could possibly go wrong?

Quick update: My posts would not be complete without my daily weather rant. Today it is snowing here...really? When my wife and I got married and decided to live somewhere, we could have went anyplace in the world. Yet, somehow we chose the upper Midwest where the Winters are cold as hell, the Summers are hot and humid, and if you're lucky, Spring & Fall will happen on a weekend so you can enjoy them.
 
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Hey IAG, 8th day -

You guys are doing awesome.

I just realized 8th day, you must be confused because you're being told different methods, etc.

First, everyone reacts differently, comes from different schools of thought, etc.

IAG, wants to more or less do things as naturally as possible. (No judgement IAG, just trying to point out differences.).

Maintenance meds or ORT (opiate replacement therapy) can be life-changing for some of us. Especially when you've had a long-term habit, with a high tolerance.

There's a very small success rate in recovery. Yes, very disheartening. Maintenance helps that success rate increase. It helps to avoid full-blown relapses.

Recovery requires more than ceasing drug use. Therapy, meetings, support, hobbies you enjoy, a spiritual life, etc. It's more than putting a sub under your tongue everyday or taking your methadone dose. You need to participate in it. It's a positive thing.

It's not replacing one habit with another. I don't get high on Subutex. It doesn't cause drug-seeking behavior or wanting more. It's a partial-agonist opiate. Not a full-agonist like heroin, ps's, etc.

I had a long-term opiate dependence. I was clean for almost 2yrs. Them started chipping, and the rest is history.

Going on Subutex is one of the wisest decisions I've ever made. It saved me.

8th day, also regarding comfort meds. Mucinex and loperamide don't make me jittery or keep me awake. And I'm prone to anxiety.

It's really difficult to taper on PST. As you know. Its cut and dry tapering with Subutex. You don't have to stay on it long term if you don't want to. It can decrease your suffering tremendously. It keeps things simple and understandable.

Recovery is very personal. We each have to decide what works best for us. Sorry if I confused you in any way 8th day. Hang in there.
 
Thanks 10yearsgone--good clarification and great point about how recovery is very personal. I have no experience with anything other than violent cold turkey and while is was horrible, it did work for me--for a while. I wonder sometimes if I had been on a sub or methadone program if I could have avoided relapsing. I'm not sure I am wired for a long term program though--I was actually doing pretty well tapering down the PST but just became impatient and frustrated with it and wanted it to be done.
 
IAG-

I fully respect and support you in your decisions, and how you're handling yourself. You are an exception. And very, very strong.

I get the feeling from 8th days posts, that she's close to saying screw it, I'd rather drink some tea than feel like this. Gabapentin, lope and Mucinex might give her a chance to regroup. Get some sleep, get her bearings and take a breath.

We both understand that feeling unfortunately. Just wanted to clarify that with you IAG. ❤️
 
@10YearsGone: Thanks for supportive words. Not feeling especially strong today as the lack of sleep (and snow...) is wearing on me--and, obviously not strong enough to avoid a relapse. But, I'm done kicking myself around for that mistake.

I also suggested the Loop but have read that the Gabapentin can have its own set of evils so should be used sparingly. I'm not against support meds, which is why I suggested she consider seeing her doctor who knows her medical history and could help work out a plan for relief, if needed. All I know about withdrawal/recovery is just based on 2 CT's in the past year so I am far from an expert, and probably have no idea what I am talking about most of the time (maybe I should put that disclaimer on my posts!). And I agree, I would rather see her get some relief, before returning to the PST.

But I do sense 8thday has the strength to be successful in her recovery--she has a supportive family, strong faith, is in good physical shape, used to run endurance, and somehow went on a vacation with her family during the first few days of withdrawal--that is so very impressive. I had the mental capacity of of a baked potato at that point and was wishing for death.
 
10years, thank you for all of the kind words and advice. Much needed this morning. Took 2 Immodium and some Dramamine last night. Horrible idea. I was about to puke at 3am. I don't know how you could take so many Immodium. My mouth was dry as cotton and still had the hot and cold flashes all night. I might have got an hour, but I don't even know.
 
Gollum, your lack of sleep is not helping give me any hope. Did your sleep come back last time? How long is this going to take? Last week right now I was on a plane to Cali for Spring Break and feeling pretty miserable. I am okay with the feeling crappy and nausea because Ive been pregnant so many times and it feels like you have the flu for 4 months straight, and can deal with the runs, but this lack of sleep is killing me. I'm hoping this won't throw me into an episode of MS. After giving birth to a child, I has horrible neurological issues for months and had several tests and they told me it was Multiple Sclerosis. I had a year of misery and a new baby crying and keeping me up at night, but I did get a little sleep. I usually only get a flare if I have a surgery or run a marathon. I remember after they told me it was most likely MS, I went home and went for a run, I dragged the left side of my body, half tripping until I hit one mile and sobbed. The thought of not having a healthy body about killed me. Not being able to do the things I love most or be a good mom. FFww a few years and more kids, even though they told me not to. I was feeling better and decided to run a half marathon. I kicked it. I decided then to run a whole. I always drag the left side of my body those last 8 miles of a marathon. Because Im a little crazy and OCD with my running, I ended up qualifying for the Boston Marathon, unfortunately 7 week before ruined my knee on a training run. I didn't know it at the time, so I got a cortisone shot to help me get through the marathon and was going to get surgery when I got back. I hadn't run in 7 weeks because I honestly couldn't really walk my knee hurt so bad. I ended up running it on the hottest BM on record. It was sheer hell and I remember wanting to stop and die at mile 21. This was before the bombing. After ruining my knee, I was beside myself. I needed running to give me dopamine. I ended up having multiple surgeries after than and ffww many more years, here I am. I didn't ever take pain meds, even really Tylenol or Ibuprofen. Just goes to show that absolutely no one is immune from this. I have to go to church and I'm teaching on Shadrach, Meshach, Abednego and Daniel. The scriptures are full of so many incredible people and examples to live by. The world has always been and will be full of beautiful people. I am so grateful for the kind people on here. This is horrible to get through.
On another note......you bought a PLANE!!!! WOW! You are a serious adrenaline junkie. Your wife must be pretty amazing to be okay with that. I would have told my husband to take it back! haha
 
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