It only occurred because i had taken 8mg of etizolam and got ballsy. I thought, "lets see how far this goes?".
It went too far. The benzos didn't stop the horror show that ensued.
I wouldnt dare taking more than 25mg without benzos.
Yes that’s all very fitting. Thanks for elaborating on that. It struck me as peculiar, not what I imagined or ever expected from yourself by general feel and guage via observation.
I don’t mean- you’re a lightweight, cowardly cat lol. Not at all. But I see you as being astutely aware and informed about your drugs in general, so I couldn’t imagine you in your right mind dosing it that way.
But your explanation, that tendancy you have with lots of etiz, and major disinhibition! That explains it in one, I get you.
Sorry there was terror, but another case of psychedellics shining through benzos (thieno, bieno, Beano (old English Kids Comic with Dennis the Menace lol).
But likely the warm benzo underlay, while nowhere close to nullifying, kept it from being that extra notch more enduring. And hence less enjoyable, in usual circumstances I mean, because I’m guessing the only part of that trip you “enjoyed” was when it finally subsided.
But that can be beautiful too. I’ve had countless “bad” trips. But has always ended well. No scars. Always up on my feet in short time. Lots and lots of fantastic trips too.
Good and bad days really. We get used to it, what you are familiar with is often easier to manage.
So also on that
@negrogesic I thought of you last weekend, remembering well your tales of outta behaviours Etizolam, soundingly mindless shoplifting acts lol, 2 fridays ago, I accidentally “over”dosed on my Etiz. I type it that way, it was safe effectively, but only if I’m laying safely asleep. But an overdose in a different valid sense.
I’m allergic to PG solution, so I carefully weigh my Etiz powder into an opaque bottle and add precise olive oil for 1mg to 3 ml olive oil.
So I stirred up the remainder in the bigger bottle, tipped into 10 ml one. I didn’t realise, made clear in hindsight, there were big undissolved clumps of Etiz powder on the bottom of the bottle.
So by good reasoning, my favoured 2.5 mg doses, could have been 15 mg’s.
God I made a right old mess I Managed to cook myself some food successfully but then I tried to make a Nutribullet with rice milk and Cocoa Powder.
Except I failed to put the actual blade into the Nutribullet, didn’t realise.
It leaked ALL over the kitchen bench. Running into kitchen draws etc. I quickly got 3 big glass bowls out to wipe it into ASAP, SAMSHED 2 of the big bowls on the floor, glass everywhere shit lol!
I collected most the spilt milk, topped up, tried again, STILL without the blade dumb fuck Etiz overdosed me, and same thing happened. Frantic clean up. Mum had to spend hours doing it properly that morning. I couldn’t.
I swept up the broken glass (and not all of it), but even tipped that into the recycling bin. So I had to go out in darkness last Wednesday night on a super heavy acid trip, weak muscled, and carefully empty the recycling wheeliebin into the Domestic waste bin, glass shards sliding and squeezing in amidst wide cardboard.
I had loads amnesia next day. Even up to 16 mg’s Etiz, amnesia barely occurs for me.
God knows what I dosed. It did taste noticeably bitter.
Missed out on the rice milk, spilt the lot lol. Made some rye toast, burnt my finger, bent the grill, no recollection, spilt my dinner plate on my carpet...TWICE I can recall, picked up each time, dashed cloth wiping up job etc, ratted as heck, clinging onto consciousness.
Mum reports a possible other food spill I’ve no recollection of, with my face in the plate on the floor out cold lol, feeling great though haha.
I finally finished the plate, sat kneeling to stay awake plate on floor.
Slept 7 unbroken lovely hours, felt really okay and refreshed too, but felt so shit for the mess I made with the mistake overdose of Etiz. Coulda been up to 50 mg’s honestly.
The Saturday night after my deep abysmal sleep off, feeling revived, is when I dropped the midnight 1000 ug dose too.
I won’t be making that mistake again no chance. I never take more drugs than I know I can handle in the short term, first and foremost.
The longer, or with LSD short after term is the hard bitt for me lately.