Damn, I kind of want to trip again, but I have no idea what I want to take. I'm also very worried about the fact that taking psychedelics this year seems to have been aggravating a horrible trigeminal nerve pain I've been dealing with. I don't think the psychedelics are the root cause (see below), but I very much wish to avoid the horrible pain I suffered for roughly 3 weeks after the big mescaline trip I took 5 weeks ago. It has largely faded away to almost nothing now, but I worry it could come back with a vengeance if I trip again. I might try something short duration figuring there's less area-under-the-curve activity in case that matters. I could have some mushrooms or maybe 2C-D. Too bad I am still quite excited to try 2C-P at 4 mg, but it may have to wait a bit.
Despite the weeks of pain I experienced after the mescaline trip, I feel very positively about it. I experienced a tremendous mood lift and complete change in mental habits for the better. I also felt like my body was doing good, productive things, even though I was feeling very much under the weather for those weeks.
Now I'm feeling much more stable, balanced, and energetic than I have since I started withdrawing from topical corticosteroids late September last year. I made the serious mistake of going cold turkey in several critical skin areas, triggering extreme symptoms, not just on the skin but systemically. I lost the ability to sleep for more than 1-2 hours a day. My body was burning huge amounts of energy in the process of being severely inflamed. I lost a bunch of weight despite eating as much as I could, and I'm pretty sure that my immune system was basically too overwhelmed to function properly. When I backtracked starting in January, my skin and systemic symptoms only partly improved and further progress was very slow going. Despite not having stabilized in June, I started cutting again, and this time I'm following a long-term taper schedule. Despite cutting back and experiencing some worsening of symptoms from time to time, My overall condition is improving and stabilizing with time. Since the last few weeks, I'm finally able to consistently sleep reasonably well for about 7 hours consecutively and up to 9 hours with an afternoon nap. I feel like my body is trying to recover from an enormous sleep debt.
I suspect the trigeminal nerve pain is ultimately caused by the withdraw, especially since nerve pain in general is reported often by others going through this withdraw. Maybe if I'm lucky, the trigeminal pain is on its way out for good. I really hope so because I love tripping and because the tripping is very therapeutic for me in so many other ways including coaxing my skin to heal from the damage it's suffered.
Despite the weeks of pain I experienced after the mescaline trip, I feel very positively about it. I experienced a tremendous mood lift and complete change in mental habits for the better. I also felt like my body was doing good, productive things, even though I was feeling very much under the weather for those weeks.
Now I'm feeling much more stable, balanced, and energetic than I have since I started withdrawing from topical corticosteroids late September last year. I made the serious mistake of going cold turkey in several critical skin areas, triggering extreme symptoms, not just on the skin but systemically. I lost the ability to sleep for more than 1-2 hours a day. My body was burning huge amounts of energy in the process of being severely inflamed. I lost a bunch of weight despite eating as much as I could, and I'm pretty sure that my immune system was basically too overwhelmed to function properly. When I backtracked starting in January, my skin and systemic symptoms only partly improved and further progress was very slow going. Despite not having stabilized in June, I started cutting again, and this time I'm following a long-term taper schedule. Despite cutting back and experiencing some worsening of symptoms from time to time, My overall condition is improving and stabilizing with time. Since the last few weeks, I'm finally able to consistently sleep reasonably well for about 7 hours consecutively and up to 9 hours with an afternoon nap. I feel like my body is trying to recover from an enormous sleep debt.
I suspect the trigeminal nerve pain is ultimately caused by the withdraw, especially since nerve pain in general is reported often by others going through this withdraw. Maybe if I'm lucky, the trigeminal pain is on its way out for good. I really hope so because I love tripping and because the tripping is very therapeutic for me in so many other ways including coaxing my skin to heal from the damage it's suffered.
