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☮ Social ☮ PD Social Thread: Trans-dimensional Hyperspace Cocktail Bar - Fractals Apply Within

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kidklmx: It most definitely sounds like we would be great friends! I'll give those a listen when I'm not needing to go to bed so that my sleep schedule reset was all for nothing! Have you heard of Guy Furious? His Pillow Talk EP is absolutely AMAZING. If you like Bondax, Bwana, Koreless, that kind of future garage-y stuff, you'll love Guy Furious. The actual bpm is fast, but the samples and synths used are so gentle and calm it's a calming ear candy.
 
johannes kreisler said:
yesterday evening I gave my parents and myself 125mg (+60mg booster @45min) of MDMA. both ~60 years old and drug-naive besides alcohol and some cannabis.
went great (I also put a lot of effort and planning into this project). some things seem permanently changed, but in a light and subtle way.

quotes (mum):
"I see you much more as a friend and partner now." (goal N°1 of the experiment)
"when I used to pray, I prayed that I will become a better person. I feel like I can become a better person with that stuff"

for me it was obviously challenging as I was the initiator/guide/therapist and felt responsible for the safety and fruitful outcome of this session. when peak effects wore of, I physically crumbled but up to now there was no mental negativity and no regrets (neither in me nor in them). I was never troubled by role conflicts (was my biggest fear). I was just myself the whole time through.
I learned many things I wouldn't have asked for and honestly I feel proud that I was confident enough to successfully face this challenge.
my dose was alright for managing the experience, my mother was where I wanted her to be, father was underdosed. he even said he doesn't feel anything but nevertheless snuggled for 2h on the carpet and in blankets =D . would give him 150 initially next time - or 25mg of 4aco-dmt. probably suits the old boys better.
time will show longterm effects. I hope it helps them to stop neurotically fucking up their communication (goal N°2). maybe a trip without my presence would be indicated...
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Fascinating.
 
johannes maybe you should write up a trip report. im sure many (myself included) would love to read it.

it is awesome when people actuall use drugs as a tool.
 
Arrr, any free-world seafarers playing GTA V yet? Not condoning piracy, but it's great when you can make all your friends jealous :D

Psy: I'll get in to it later on. If you're a garage guy then check out Crown Duels as well. Great stuff
 
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Captain.Heroin said:
I have seen better days. How's everyone else in PD doing?
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kingme said:
awesome. tunnel of boobs.
but the sound was delicious too. thanks!

saturday looks pretty ok actually, feeling refreshed and happy. had a good tipe with lsz last night, and now gettign ready to watch some movie.

how is your day?
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Sorry to hear that cap'n, same goes for me - this past month was pretty horrible, I somehow got 'maxed out' on experiences and emotions that I found hard to process. But not much actually happened, it is just that 1) I was forced to interact a lot with people during my vacation weeks, 2) I gradually lost touch with the regularity of things I had at home and 3) my dad had to go to the hospital and I felt powerless when he suffered and he got a bit afraid / confused / weirded out.
The stuff with my dad was sort of the final drop, I was already breaking down... slowly getting more dissociation (zoning out) and semi-OCD-style fixations and depression + exhaustion.

Luckily I am starting to feel better now... maybe it's a coincidence but I felt better after I had that ultra intense 5-MeO-DMT + MXE + K trip and now I again feel more healed after I took a hit of acid on saturday. I didn't really trip and felt quite bad anxiety - exacerbation of pre-existing anxiety, but I guess it still may have precipitated things 'in the background' or subliminally...
I don't really care what my shrink says, I am now considering psychedelics as one of the few things that actually seem to be good medicine for me. Of course I have known their value for a long time, but more recently I abstained due to medication, seeing it as a potential risk for my mental health - in principle. But the benefits seem to outweigh the risks from what I can tell.
What the illness is exactly is still a little uncertain but I am pretty much about to get an autistiform diagnose for the second time, though the first maybe was not official enough. I am getting one more, with serious testing, that should seal the deal. It will probably have a big impact on my life since it implies that I am getting further removed from making a career and instead will rely on disability wellfare even if I do the occasional volunteering oddjobs, any actual achievements those I may have to achieve at home, with limited resources.

Am on oxy tonight.. wish I could get some hydrocodone by trading or something..

Made tom kha gai soup for me and my best buddy slash housemate, it turned out perfectly :D

I am donating 50 shroom spore prints to a spore ring and expect to receive a free FSRE t-shirt for that... the envelope is ready to go. I am also continuing with gourmet mushrooms, like a shiitake log, and Pioppino, Garden giant, Lion's mane and more.

Also I am making a lot of progress with playing the piano, started on more awesome work by Bach and Beethoven among other things, I may post something later on.

Hopefully I can sustain this upswing - please send me your bestest vibes <3
Meanwhile check out this insane fugue I have also started practising. It has some pretty bizarre harmony in it but I think it is impressive.
 
Ugh, dozing of in the middle of the night sucks big time. If I go to sleep now (8pm) I'll never be awake before sundown :( Can someone come to my house and inject me with some cocaine around 12pm?
 
kidklmx said:
Ugh, dozing of in the middle of the night sucks big time. If I go to sleep now (8pm) I'll never be awake before sundown :( Can someone come to my house and inject me with some cocaine around 12pm?
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Actually it's in the a.m. ;)
I'm in the same boat : P
Tho I abhor coke... how bout some modafinil? The only thing that sucks ass about it is that you can get a paradoxical reaction and fall the fuck asleep when you take it. :D

Just A Guy said:
^^^^ Sending my bestest vibes bro
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Thanks!

Hey here's the trip report I promised:
http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/threads/...ne-100-mg-MXE-IM)-Experienced-Tripping-Globes
 
Seems like we're in the same boat every night, I always see you posting at those shady hours :D

But eh, coffee will have to make due for now.
 
@solipsis bestest vibes man!
cant listen to the pianowork now, but iwll later in the day.
i too contributed quite a lot to FSRE, in fact i only ever kept a few prints as souvenires and to continue growing. never got the tshirt though.... ah well. also donated some time ago, i love that place for what it does.
i wish i were able to grow shiitake but couldnt find a local place that sells the plugs to start the colony.
 
Thanks!

Right now I'm having hiccups, it's gotta be like the 8th bout today!!
I just read that GABAB agonists may cure it, it would be pretty awesome if I could stop them by taking a little phenibut but unfortunately I'd better not because I have an opioid in my system and mixing in phenibut may very well make me feel like utter shit.

Just saw the finale of Breaking Bad, that is awesome _O_

I'll post another Goldberg Variation tomorrow, a fughetta. :)
 
aw yiss, I love bach. how long've you played?
I'd like to record my music, but I'd need to brush up my repertoire it's all a little rusty. and when I practice I'll alyways end up inprov jamming instead of actually working on anything :o

what I really want to do is play while on psychedelics. When I took acid I heard the most incredible music come from nowhere. like nothing I'd heard before - if only I could capture that...
 
kidklmx said:
Wow, very brave of you if the two were having marital issues. I wouldn't be able to face that with a couple so close to me, do you have experience with psychotherapy or was it more of an armchair type of deal?
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they don't really have marital issues but do fight a lot about nothing. and I saw them burning themselves up in the system with no reason, what I failed to accept any longer.
then there's a ton of guilt and trauma in our little family of 3. too much violence.

yes, actually I honestly wouldn't advise anyone to seriously consider doing psychedelic therapy on their own parents. that being said: I was a little blue and had some doubts ("too much empathy") on day 2 after (on day 1 some oxycodon fell into my hands, which I stupidly consumed and felt weak for afterwards) but I don't regret anything! :) I would do it again without hesitation. I knew what would happen and estimated the consequences and decided to go for it. an experience like this does change the shared biography no matter what.
from what I've heard from them until now I was and am much more worried about the whole thing then they are. knowledge and awareness make you sensitive in a good as much as in a bad way. the naivité you have as a psychedelic virgin is priceless...
btw: I am academically involved both in clinical psychology and in research on psychoactives (MDMA atm to be precise :) ); doing psychotherapy with or without the assistance of PAS is a long-term goal of mine. and I initiated a few people and guided couples through trips before. sure this makes me generally much more competent, experienced and confident when it comes to projects like this but the level of responsibility and potential consequences of failure were exceptionally high this time. could have very well torn my self value and confidence in this field to pieces. usually I don't take risks like that (any more) but I felt that this is less about me than about those that are significant to me and also that I should fuckin trust those substances whose beneficial and curative effects I preach day after day. :)

and a bit OT: it's sad that MDMA is not a safe substance compared to other PAS. forces you into fights you should not have to waste your energy for. for therapeutic applications I'd personally prefer 6-APB anyway. more of the whole story, less of a push, all of the clarity. dear chemists: please develop a substance with the psychological effects of 6-apb, the safety of mescaline, no significant physical side effects and neither neuro- nor cardiotoxic. that'd be great. [actually the available substances are alright, what is needed are clinical tests regarding safety and efficacy - what is needed is a change in policy. my personal perfect psycholytic toolbox would consist of 6-APB, MAOi+smoked DMT, some 4-subt-tryptamine; maybe aMT and MXE for the more somatically oriented candidates; 2c-b/c/d for maintenance and ketamine to acutely dissolve the darkest clouds. :D ]


kingme said:
johannes maybe you should write up a trip report. im sure many (myself included) would love to read it.

it is awesome when people actuall use drugs as a tool.
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yes. I probably should do that at some point. things will have to settle first.
 
If you'll ever get around to writing a report, then I'm very much looking forward to it. :) This aspect of the psychedelic experience interests me the most, but you hardly ever hear much about it. If there is any work being done then it's by rogue psychologists/psychiatrists who don't really want to be uncovered. A change in policy is very much needed, yes. We're slowly working towards that though, it'll be exciting to see how the next 10-20 years will pan out. Kind of wish I'll meet a rogue psychologist who doesn't care about classifications and just takes me as his/her apprentice. Pretty much threw away any opportunity to be academically active during my "stupid years" :(

Hopefully the situation within your family will change for the better, at least you have my prayer!

p.s What does your use of PAS stand for? I got what you were saying, but when I searched for the acronym on google I got at least 10 different results for psychology alone and none of them seemed to be fitting. (Also, does smoked DMT really count as psycholytic? Seems rather extreme to me :))
 
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