I plan to embark on a journey shortly... 6g dried cubensis, in the form of homogenised powdered capsules. This should be interesting, given my housemates got full effects from less than 2 grams. It seems the homogenising and powdering if the material makes a massive difference in intensity, come up time, and reduction of nausea/digestive issues.
I'm definitely excited! It's a fairly chilly day, overcast and somewhat foggy... But I feel it may add to the mental space in a unique way, even if the OEVs aren't as pretty haha. Will have to rug up if I go for a walk though.. Only like 4°C :/
Nice man, I hope you have a great trip. I was just talking to my girl about mushrooms today... she mentioned she wants to do them sometime soon on a nature day, and I realized I haven't one them in... well, probably 7 years since I had a proper one, I did take a low dose once in a cluttered apartment in downtown Chicago with my cousin and ex, and dealt with him having an existential crisis and her obsessing over whether we were offending the other family members we left behind. So I don't really count it, terrible setting.
Speaking of my girl... well, tonight was a great night, truly great. I decided to try the ethylphenidate + etizolam combo again (plus a couple of beers), and it was exactly like the last time (I don't remember if I mentioned it on here or not) where it basically removes all of the negatives of all of the drugs and combines all the positives. I took 75mg of EPH at like 3pm, and then 2mg of etizolam at 4 when the EPH was about to get jittery and weird. Then I redosed the EPH just like 20-40mg (all oral) every hour or two, whenever it seemed right. I also took 2mg more of etiz at about 7, and drank 3 beers throughout the night. And basically, all night I felt amazing. I was speaking to people totally confidently and honestly and without any fear. My girl came over, we were going to meet her friendswho were visiting (well, I was going to meet them but we were going to meet up with them at a free show). But they were running very late so we went to my friends' house, who were also all going, and hung out. I felt maximally clever, quick, and it was honestly empathogenic, I was telling my friends all the things I really like about them and what they're good at and we were getting into some great, deep conversations (same as last night when my friend and I did the same combo). Then we went to the show, met up with her friends, they were cool, we conversed. Everything felt awesome, not in an "oh my god I'm overwhelmed with euphoria" way, but in a "everything just feels perfect and I have full confidence" sort of way.
Then my girl and I drove home (she drove actually, she didn't take anything but a little weed) and had a really deep conversation about our exes and how that ended... I got pretty deep into telling her about the emotional abuse and the weird shit my ex did, and about how I appreciate her so much because now that I have learned important lessons about healthy relationships, here she is, being super healthy about it. And she told me about hers, nothing bad like mine, but it was good to hear about it in detail anyway, because it was something I didn't know about her. Then we got home and kept talking for a while and went upstairs and started having sex... and let me just say, I think this is the best sex drug combo I've ever done. The overall feeling of it reminds me of cocaine except only the good parts and way longer lasting, but coke makes it hard to get it up... in this case, it was basically impossible to get it down. After just over 2 hours, we finally finished... best sex I've ever had, it was awesome. Then we were snuggling and saying sweet things to each other and I just realized I had to say it... I told her, "I'm really thankful you decided to find me on OkCupid, because now I love you". She just squeezed me really tight and I think cried slightly (but I couldn't see because our faces were pressed together) and then said "me too". And I said I know, I could tell, and she said, "me too".

And I told her I'd been wanting to tell her for a while now but that I was just scared to for some reason, and she said it was the same for her, she almost said it a bunch of times and so did I.
So now I'm eating some peanut butter toast and drinking a couple of beers to get a little more relaxed so I can get some sleep... I didn't get much sleep last night, staying up talking intensely about emotional and exciting things last night too with my friend, on the same combo (very productive band direction/planning talk actually). And tomorrow is river hike day so I need to recover energy.
I'm really glad I found this combo because honestly it's one of the most emotionally opening things I've taken, partly because it's in a really sober way. And it's weird because when I take it by itself it makes me feel closed off and uncomfortable and kinda jonsey, but with etizolam it's like the perfect stimulant, therapeutic even, and very surprisingly long-lasting for me. I used the last of my only gram tonight (I shared quite a bit too - plus it is definitely kind of compulsive this way), and I shan't be ordering more for a while, but I'll have to revisit. But requiring a benzo adds an extra level of concern. I tried the combo twice in 2 days and each time it consistently provided a beautiful, emotionally opening energetic euphoria. Gotta be careful when you know such a thing is available, and not overuse it.
On the other hand, I was able to connect emotionally with the person I love in some deeper ways than ever before because my fear was lifted, and I got the courage to take that step and tell her how I feel, and that's a beautiful thing that I was having trouble breaking through to. So, I'm glad I did it.
