I was thinking about starting a thread on acid and ketamine. They seem to go so well together and mutually potentiate each other. I didn’t know what kind of risks there are. But on acid I was getting k-holed off of a 50 mg snort of k time and time again whereas I needed 150 mg IM sober to get to the same place.
www.bluelight.org
Hey man. How goes the institution? Making progress? Merely surviving? On the run already?Lysergamides - [Combo Subthread] LSD & Ketamine
mixed L and K for the first time about a month ago. it was grand, strongly recommend it. i called her Ellen Kay.
Naturally it exists already
Good, I'm stable from the Serouel XR, but I also have severe ADHD (which my psychiatrist is on board with and I'll probably get tested for) so I'm running up walls and generally being very confused. I get along fairly well with some people, except my roommate who is the epitome of depression, he insists on keeping the curtains and windows closed lol. But I get along fine with a number of people, and remaining time I spend watching sports and participating in activities, like walking, cooking, relaxation exercises. I've been put in the addiction group which sucks, 5 sessions of 1 hour, I can't sit still for as long, get homework every time and is focused on things I already know. I was put in there because I used amphetamines to work and study, I am not addicted at all, I can hardly think of a more miserable way to spend my time but I just need 'em to function in environments where concentration is a must. I'm honestly pissed about it, I've missed the big walk every time now because of it, I swear that would be 10x more beneficial to me than extremely superficial addiction therapy.
All in all sounds pretty good for recovery. It sounds like the kind of dual-diagnosis place I went to. They said they deal equally with substance use and your psychiatric condition but the majority of emphasis was on the substance use. However, if it is any encouragement a lot of stuff I ended up learning on the addiction side became valuable to me in life more generally over time. Like Mindfullness and CBT.
Sounds like you should be looking for guidance on self-monitoring. Being able to tell exactly what your mental state is doing to your external behaviour and then being able to modify that behaviour if it’s career limiting. If so, that’s very similar to where I was in rehab/recovery. I kept fucking up with work through poor relationships with people but was entirely oblivious to where I was going wrong in dealing with them because I was so totally unaware of who I was / what I was like when I was cycling. Mindfullness was like the answer I’d been waiting for my whole life. Just being able to stand a little apart from myself like a zealous security guard who could step in and guide me out of trouble before I went to far.
It did feel a lot like they were deliberately trying to crack or fracture our emotional defences by forcing us to confront ourselves without distraction.It worked long term but I was so full of anguish the first week I could barely function ad a result.
Noted, thanks.
Think of it like crutches for your mind. You only need it until your walking again on your own. The sooner the better. I think the first time I was on it I took it for about 4 months. And that was off of a rock bottom psychotic break.
I think the ability to just sit quietly with yourself for an hour or more with no distractions but with no negative thoughts, feelings, or emotions is extraordinarily hard but a source of considerable mental resiliance. I only learned to do it over many years of therapy and practice (and a bit of ECT) . Before that the absence of distraction just immediately uncorked anxiety. I could not even spend 5 minutes in bed after i woke up without becoming anxious for want of something to stop me thinking.
In my younger days, I would have found you and pushed you in the river. "Go with the flow man" Instead, I'll mumble to myself about the NSA and praise allahPlaying a show at an adventure center at the deepest gorge east of the Mississippi today. Tonight, rather. Another hour and a half of work and I'm off to meet up, pack our gear, and drive out there. Hopefully have time to do some zip lining before we have to set up.
OMG, roti canai! I miss this so much! It's like cheap street food in parts of NZ, and it's so good. You can't even find it in the city I live in, or in any neighboring cities. I finally resorted to making it myselfThis reminds me of the stalls in Singapore that do egg prata:
Oh god I'm so hungry thinking about that. They are basically roti with a cracked egg tucked into them, and served with this delicious curry sauce to dip into. So good, hot and fresh off the skillet, great any time of day. The street food in Singapore is amazing, there is an intersection of so many cultures there - tamil, malay, chinese, indonesian, british..
Oh man! I really wanted to go to that festival (I think Moon Hooch is playing?) but I thought I was going to still be working night shift in Texas. I just remembered it todayPlaying a show at an adventure center at the deepest gorge east of the Mississippi today. Tonight, rather. Another hour and a half of work and I'm off to meet up, pack our gear, and drive out there. Hopefully have time to do some zip lining before we have to set up.
