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☮ Social ☮ PD Social Talk Thread: If 2020 Was the Dumpster, Can 2021 Be the Fire?

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I went for moodswings (probably bipolar II, maybe I), and by now it has gotten so that I’m never really ‘normal’ again. The main problem is that the extremes get more extreme and last longer with time, so who knows what happens in like a year after I just go about my business. She also saw me just after I just blanked a night so I was obviously a manic mess, but I’m much more calmed down now.

Incredibly shitty situation, I’d honestly hate to have to give up tripping on top of everything, it’s the only time where I can get a true look into my behaviour.
Bipolar is a bitch, I'm sorry to hear you're going through that :( I have pretty bad moodswings myself and at times have had psychiatrists tell me my mania has been symptomatic of Bipolar disorders but I always just walk away from the drugs they offer. If SSRIs, SNRIs, TCAs, any of those actually had scientific fact backing their use as anxiety/mental disorder treatment, I'd be willing to give up tripping for stability... but fact of the matter is my wife can't stand when I'm on any of those types of medications. I lose my libido, I'll get easily angry and snap at her, etc.

I dunno man, do what you feel is right. You can always try out a treatment and if the side-effects are too much, taper off and drop whatever they put you on. I tried everything the doctors threw at me for my IBS disorder (they all thought I was just anxious) and my God were the side-effects bad from mental-meds... When I finally got put on alprazolam my life got a little normality. Not saying that's your answer, but rather that I can empathize with that difficult decision: at what point do the side-effects outweigh the relief?
 
Damn Buzz, sorry to hear, man. :( I'm sure that in time, you'll be able to figure it out. Mental illness is such a bitch. You're at the age when this sort of stuff usually starts to really manifest. The good news is, as you get older, you figure yourself out more and more. My advice is to try, but don't be afraid to advocate for yourself and do what feels right. Don't let yourself be made to feel like you shouldn't be able to say yes or no to a given therapy/drug. Also, you should try pursuing avenues besides drugs, like therapy and lifestyle changes.

Best of luck brother. ♥️ Don't forget I'm always here to talk.

Man, dealing with mental illness Is so hard. My girlfriend suffers from generalized anxiety disorder, and she refuses to take meds, which I respect. But finding an adequate therapy Is so hard it can also be quite frustrating. Right now she is trying psychoanalysis, and so far shes been comfortable with it, but we both know progress is really slow.

Yeah my girl also refuses to take medication. I respect it, too, but I wish she'd at least consider certain things.
 
Been horribly dope sick today coming off the IV fentanyl binge the transition to Bupe has not been seamless in the slightest had to sniff like 10mgs to stop the vomiting putting pieces in cap on toothpaste tube and adding little water mixing till dissolved and sniffing the water it works good that's how we got high in prison all the time. My friend is about to be here now with more Bupe strips and I'm getting more from somebody else on Friday so i should be good. Gonna have some Ephenidine to play with next week that I'm ridiculously excited about I've been wanting to trial something from that family for awhile now. Hopefully after being on Bupe for the week my stomach will be stable again. I miss my Dissos so much i really want my friend to give me more Ketamine but he is so worried about me that isnt happening until I show him more progress. He is so responsible with drugs it's pretty admirable.

When he saw me rail 500mgs Ketamine in four lines one after another his jaw hit the floor said he has only ever done 30-50mg bumps, till he met the Shadow Cat 😛

He held me through the K-hole and it was incredibly spiritual and bonding experience we will be friends for the rest of our lives for sure. He wanted me to come over tonight but I was just too sick from the Fentadope. But maybe I will when i am off on Friday and we can play around should be fun if like to do some GHB maybe redose few times and take something psychedelic. Maybe DOC and 4-AcO-DMT earlier in the day and the GHB during the nite i have off Saturday also so I can stay up.
 
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Man guys, I've been taking 20mg of MK-677 orally every night before bed (it stimulates growth hormone and really improves my quality of sleep as well, I've been sleeping really well for a change), and 500ug of BPC under the skin in the morning, and I gotta say I am feeling good. I am also not doing other drugs, but for the first time in a long time, I don't really want to. I'm working out within an hour of waking up and sometimes again later... my mood has been uniformly positive. My back and knees hurt a lot less and I have a lot of energy. I'm finding myself wanting to get a good night's sleep, and the thought of getting stims or alcohol is unappealing because I know they'd make me feel worse.

I feel more clearheaded, too. It's really nice. :)
 
They've prescribed me Abilify and they want to keep me under observation in an institution for a week, jesus...
My appointment was just when I was at my most manic, it gives the wrong impression, really gotta think about both....

So fucked up man, many other medication names were dropped (Lithium, Zyprexa....), I already know how this is gonna go, endless trying of meds with all sorts of side effects and a shit life as a result.
I honestly don't know how it ever got so far, and I have no idea what I'm gonna do

Although Xork's position can't be faulted, I'd like to side with Gravy here, and urge you to try out as many alternatives as you can before indulging in chemicals whose primary benchmark indeed is how well they shelve people away.

So although I'd never dream to advise this otherwise, if the alternative is a diet of modified antihistamines (which antipsychotics historically are) then do consider a diet of ketones instead. The ketogenic diet flattens mood considerably. For me it's an unwanted side-effect, I'm still in search of other ways to get inspiration now. But if there's mania involved then it makes total sense to pull its plug and abolish sugar and carbs, and run mainly on fat. Moreover, there could be a mitochondrial dysfunction involved in bipolar, and the keto diet is relevant to that functional level of magnification, as the body adapts to a slower energy source by increasing mitochondria count in nerve cells.

I'm not the first one to come up with this either. People have been reporting success:
 
Man, I went to a psychologist today, she completely shut down after I mentioned psychedelics. I saw her brain going in overdrive, saying she needed to talk this over with a collegue because I would apparently be 'untreatable'. Then she tried to talk me into some sort of drug therapy thing because apparently there are many people there addicted to shrooms and LSD there...

What a joke, I never even mentioned amphetamines or anything else. I go there to understand myself and how to properly function better but fuck me if every therapist is going to dumb down the conversation to the so called dangers of psychedelics
 
That's absurd. A few years ago I talked to my family doctor about using psychedelics to treat depression. He was confused, but he went to talk with his supervising physician. They both did some reading before coming back to me, then decided to come up with a treatment strategy that worked alongside rather than against my psychedelic use. That's what good medicine looks like.
 
Damn Buzz, I'm sorry to hear that... it's not unexpected though. People tend to have a pretty shared opinion on psychedelics in the psychiatric community; that they're addictive evil drugs just as bad as heroin or meth and any use must therefore be abuse. Or sometimes they'll insist they induce schizophrenia. Which is obvious bullshit...

If I were you, I would never, ever mention the fact that I used any sort of recreational drugs ever for any reason to my doctor. Lying is the only way to get real help from those types of people, they'll just use psychedelics as an excuse to say, "Oh, THAT'S why you're x, y, and z," as if the richest, smartest people in the world haven't taken acid (I honestly don't think home computers would exist without LSD).

I would go to a different psych and start fresh, and withhold all information regarding drug use, simply express your symptoms. You have to realize these people profit off people NOT taking psychedelics and instead taking crap like anti-psychotics.

I'm a very honest person, I can empathize with wanting to simply tell facts instead of fiction... but MDs aren't ever going to accept a truth that involves any degree of responsible drug use. I lie to my doctor and the only drug he knows I've taken is cannabis, which I mentioned in passing maybe ten years ago now and he's all but forgotten. If he knew how much I loved downers and shit he'd never give me a benzo for my IBS... so I lie. It hurts, it's hard, but you have to lie :(
 
Man guys, I've been taking 20mg of MK-677 orally every night before bed (it stimulates growth hormone and really improves my quality of sleep as well, I've been sleeping really well for a change), and 500ug of BPC under the skin in the morning, and I gotta say I am feeling good.
Wow I've never heard of either of those.. interesting.

Yeah that's bunk @Buzz Lightbeer it's hard to take a psychologist seriously when they have such a misunderstanding.
 
Yeah exactly. I wish I hadn't shared so much though, I honestly still have got much of my shit together and my condition is not as bad as it might seem. But yeah, oversharing.. it's the name of the game.. =D

Still wanna trip this week, I should be graduated so it's kind of a cause for celebration
 
Well, I should pass by the skin of my teeth 🙄 it's not official official yet. My text is pretty bad tbh, but experiments and results wise it's quite good.
If you read very carefully, you can feel the amphetamine and 3-FPM through it, 3-FPM especially (although very addicting) is an excellent drug for anything related.
 
it was this girl I had a thing with like 8 years ago it was amazing to see that she had become such a beautiful woman. she was teenager back then when I saw her the last time. she moved to Sweden about 5 years ago but now she is back and god it was almost like reconnecting with a long lost love.

GIVE ME THAT OXYTOCIN!!!!!!!!!!!! Helluva drug
 
Well, I should pass by the skin of my teeth 🙄 it's not official official yet. My text is pretty bad tbh, but experiments and results wise it's quite good.
If you read very carefully, you can feel the amphetamine and 3-FPM through it, 3-FPM especially (although very addicting) is an excellent drug for anything related.
I used to be mystified by early reports of 3-FPM being habit forming, but now I can definitely see it. 😬
 
it was this girl I had a thing with like 8 years ago it was amazing to see that she had become such a beautiful woman. she was teenager back then when I saw her the last time. she moved to Sweden about 5 years ago but now she is back and god it was almost like reconnecting with a long lost love.

GIVE ME THAT OXYTOCIN!!!!!!!!!!!! Helluva drug

It really is, isn't it?
 
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