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☮ Social ☮ PD Social Talk Thread: Firly Swolks Discussing Mitillating Tatters Fithout Wilters

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Well you prolly was still realin fromall whe subox you took, looked intoxicated and ithey said no.

I was on some xanax and had like one beer at a bar once. Nodded out for 2 seconds, put my head down on the bar, no more service. I was lit at the time, but these bartenders gotta watch they ass or huge fine/jail.
no I dont look intoxicated on suboxone. Ive been on maintenance for 8 months now and I have kept my dose stable since the 2nd week ive been on it. Ive never missed one and all that. It was either from coming down on that shard or cause i hadnr cleaned myself up completely before I left because I was fighting with my piece of shit dad.
Basically when I left the deal was iget excited and all amped up when I watch the pens especially since this is the cup and they figured alcohol might make me disorderly? I dont know, literally the only time i ever drink is when I go to a pens game and then I may get 2 of thw big cans of lebatt blue, its not like if I do drink I get trashed
 
So my dad and I are not on great terms right now... He went through my shit while I wasn't home, found my psychedelic stash and the amphetamine sulfate I just started using again at the same therapeutic dose I took for years while I had insurance. When I tried to talk to him about this, he called me a drug addict (something I find pretty offensive, given the amount of work I have done to get and stay clean of *actually* addictive drugs and the fact that the only thing he found that is remotely habit-forming is the one every mental health professional I've talked to about my ADD agrees I should be taking, and which I'd only been taking as prescribed), and attributed basically all the symptoms of my ADD, anxiety, depression, and insomnia to this imaginary drug addiction. We had a brief and unproductive back and forth on FB messenger, in which he at least acknowledged that he should have talked to me and found out what the "dangerous drugs" actually were before throwing them out and berating me about having them, but only in between paragraphs berating me, mixing the drug addiction narrative with passive-aggressive offers to be 'helpful', lowkey gaslighting/emotional abuse, ableism, and so much other bullshit that I've lost track of my reasons for being angry with him.

Bummer man, that sucks, I'm sorry. :( My parents would be concerned if they found my drug stash for sure, because of my past opiate addiction and the amount of fear they had/have. Well I think they don't really fear I'll slip back now but they would freak out and be really scared if they found my drug box (fortunately I live 700 miles away from them). They know that I still smoke weed and they're fine with that I think. But yeah, drugs scare them too. I actually once told my mom about my life-changing mushroom trip, many years after, and she was super fascinated. Which was awesome, but that was before the addiction (or at least until it got bad and they learned about it).

Hello dear friends, as I must continue to be away for fear that my concurrent alcohol and alprazolam abuse would make me overly whiney and petty, but I felt like dropping in. After all, the jacaranda and magnolia are in full bloom! My preferred walking route has me going past the city's best offering of them both, it is wonderful.

Hey man! Nice to see you popping in. :)

I've developed a crush on a girl at work, fuck me... literally 8)

I had mostly ignored her beauty until last Friday when she came up to me when I was out at lunch and asked to sit with me. We had non-stop conversation, no awkward silences. She didn't look at her phone the whole time. She laughed at all my jokes even though I didn't laugh as much. Her excuse to sit with me was clearly off the top of her head. She has given every sign of attraction that I know of in women, even mentioning in passing that she had broken up with her boyfriend a few weeks back.

Now that I think she wants me, I can't stop thinking of her. And I choked today when I saw her, barely muscled out a 'hey'... I want to ask her out for a drink or some coffee or something non-assuming like that but, I'm fearful of asking girls out in front of other people so no opportunity has presented itself... Ugh.

Yes, I know I have a wonderful loving girlfriend. I've never had a girl seemingly come-onto me before though, and I darn well want to find out if she's into me or if I'm misinterpreting her smoke signals :sus:

Oh man, it does sound like she's into you. But hey, you have a girlfriend and I know how much you love her and how important she is to you. My strong advice is to not try to pursue anything with the girl at work. A little flirting is fine, it feels good to be desired by someone. There are a couple of girls around who I see sometimes who clearly are into me, and it makes me feel really good, but I have no intention of doing anything about it because I wouldn't want to hurt my girlfriend. It's not worth it man, for real. Best case scenario, you hook up, it's not something you're into pursuing, and your girlfriend never finds out, but you still will be guilty about it and have to live with that. Worst case scenario, you hook up and she finds out and leaves you. And how about how painful and confusing it would be to actually like this other girl too but also still your girlfriend... how do you make a decision? You'll have a lot of pain to deal with then.

Just not worth it. Enjoy the crush and eave it at that.
 
I had such a fun weekend. On Saturday I met a BLer, Fractal Genie, my girl and I went on a hike with him and it was great, lovely guy. :)

Then that evening my girl and I went to a mermaid festival in downtown of the small town where she lives. She dressed me up as a merman, basically I was wearing my underwear with a sea-colored sarong wrapped around my lower half, and sandals, and nothing else. I thought it might be kinda lame, but actually it was epic amounts of fun. I got a ton of compliments and me and my girl were like one of the hot couples... there was a lot of people dressed up as pirates and mermaids, and 3 separate times people came up to us and told us that we both have beautiful eyes. I got to drunk some rum with drunk in-character pirates. Met a dude on tons of psychedelics who is a regular at the place my girl works, he was intense but really a sweet guy, I had a lot of cool conversations with him.

At night there was a drag show, the first drag show ever in that town. The cops were driving by constantly, they obviously hated it but it was fun. :) Then we went down the street to where a band was playing. They're called Skunk Ruckus, kind of a blend between punk and country with funny song lyrics and a super awesome lead singer with a great stage personality, it was indescribably good. We had heard around town that their drummer is the drummer of ween, but he only sometimes is, he wasn't there that night, instead it was a skinny white dude. I talked to him after and he got a huge kick out of people thinking he was the drummer of Ween. =D Also, during that show my girl and I danced, felt so free. I've never seen her dance so freely, it was beautiful. We danced the whole time and it turns out some woman was videoing us with her phone and live streaming it on Facebook. Afterwards she came up to us and told us we were her favorite part of the show, that we were so beautiful and she thanked us for dancing. :) It was great though, we were like acting out the lyrics of the songs in our dances (one song was called Zombie Love Song so we danced like zombies and she ended the song/dance by biting my neck and I writhed and fell to the floor and got up as a zombie. :D Also this guy dressed in a FedEx uniform was there, sitting, one of those crew cut, southern manly-looking dudes, and after the show he came up to me and he was like, wow man, that was amazing, you were really just out there not giving a fuck, dancing in a merman costume shirtless and moving your body however you wanted. I really admire that man, I couldn't do that, thanks so much. I was like, sure you can man, jujst do it, and who cares what people think? It was such a nice interaction. :)
 
^That sounds really great! :) I am always very selfconscious when dancing in front of others :\

Anybody here into rap? This one has always been favorite of mine, very relatable. But then again... I'm pretty weird. ;)

 
I used to be really self-conscious too, but lately I have just stopped giving a fuck, it's so much more fun to just let yourself go. I don't care if people think I'm weird. I do get somewhat self-conscious sometimes still, especially depending on how I'm feeling, but I've come a long way, but I had to push through it. It helped in this case that it was a pretty weird night all around, with lots of people in costumes. :)

And yeah I like rap. :) Lots of amazing rap out there, not if you listen to the radio though, that pop rap/trap shit is garbage (IMO).
 
LSDMDMA&14053597 said:
no I dont look intoxicated on suboxone. Ive been on maintenance for 8 months now and I have kept my dose stable since the 2nd week ive been on it. Ive never missed one and all that. It was either from coming down on that shard or cause i hadnr cleaned myself up completely before I left because I was fighting with my piece of shit dad.
Basically when I left the deal was iget excited and all amped up when I watch the pens especially since this is the cup and they figured alcohol might make me disorderly? I dont know, literally the only time i ever drink is when I go to a pens game and then I may get 2 of thw big cans of lebatt blue, its not like if I do drink I get trashed

I couldnt understand your post. Thought u tried to OD on subox and was off to detox. Shoulda known it was meth ramblin due to your username ;-)

Also dancin like you dont give a fuck is awesome. I do it all the time by myself at shows and could give a fuck what people think. In general I dont really care. Other people are always telling mr to shhhh when we are out in public cuz peoples feelings might get hurt or they (people Im with might get embarrassed). As long as im not being some kind of*ist or *ic who fucking cares. This country is fucked up because only idiots get to speak their minds loudly... I am trying to counteract that (or imma idiot...)


EDIT: Since I am the last post, though this is a dif. subject....

FUCKING MALAZAN BOOK OF THE FALLEN SERIES....

Ive read a shit ton of fantasy/sci fi books/series. A few pages back I posted a picture of what Ive bought over the past three years. Ive been on this reading like a fiend shit for 2 decades. This is a hard read in a way. So many characters, so much flip flopping, so MUCH SHIT to remember, and I am only on pagr 700/900 on the third book of ten.

Wheel of Time was a cakewalk. Read it twice. Saw a companion with a lot of Robert Jordans notes was released about a week ago. Makes me want to read it again. Only 13 (?) books... ~10k pages, fuck it right?!

Sword of Truth series. Kinda pissed me off sometimes. Rhetoric seemed super repetative (but still worthwhile) at times. Still blazed through it.

Not to mention the multitude of single books and shorter series I have read.

Fucking Malazan... Like I will be so into a part, page turnin like its crack. New section starts and I am like "who the fuck is this again" and put it down for the day... Imma finish this bish though. All ten. Maybe even the three pre/sequels (cant remember which).

Come on November for that new Stormlight book. Thank you Brandon Sanderson for writing 1200 page epic novels.
 
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I have also recently started reading more again, which feels very rewarding. At the moment it's PIHKAL which was kind of daunting for me ever since it came with the post and I saw what a huge brick it is, but now that I've started it it's a really quick read actually.

I am feeling kind of strange these days, I am not sure if I even like smoking weed anymore. What a weird thought :\
 
I couldnt understand your post. Thought u tried to OD on subox and was off to detox. Shoulda known it was meth ramblin due to your username ;-)

Also dancin like you dont give a fuck is awesome. I do it all the time by myself at shows and could give a fuck what people think. In general I dont really care. Other people are always telling mr to shhhh when we are out in public cuz peoples feelings might get hurt or they (people Im with might get embarrassed). As long as im not being some kind of*ist or *ic who fucking cares. This country is fucked up because only idiots get to speak their minds loudly... I am trying to counteract that (or imma idiot...)


EDIT: Since I am the last post, though this is a dif. subject....

FUCKING MALAZAN BOOK OF THE FALLEN SERIES....

Ive read a shit ton of fantasy/sci fi books/series. A few pages back I posted a picture of what Ive bought over the past three years. Ive been on this reading like a fiend shit for 2 decades. This is a hard read in a way. So many characters, so much flip flopping, so MUCH SHIT to remember, and I am only on pagr 700/900 on the third book of ten.

Wheel of Time was a cakewalk. Read it twice. Saw a companion with a lot of Robert Jordans notes was released about a week ago. Makes me want to read it again. Only 13 (?) books... ~10k pages, fuck it right?!

Sword of Truth series. Kinda pissed me off sometimes. Rhetoric seemed super repetative (but still worthwhile) at times. Still blazed through it.

Not to mention the multitude of single books and shorter series I have read.

Fucking Malazan... Like I will be so into a part, page turnin like its crack. New section starts and I am like "who the fuck is this again" and put it down for the day... Imma finish this bish though. All ten. Maybe even the three pre/sequels (cant remember which).

Come on November for that new Stormlight book. Thank you Brandon Sanderson for writing 1200 page epic novels.

Malazan is on another level for sure. There are a TON of characters, it can be hard to follow. But there are all these pockets of amazingness in there, sometimes really rapid-fire too. And the writing is beautiful. I am on the last book, all of the last 4 are around 1200 pages each, and all the separate storylines start to come together by the end. I am like 200 pages into the last book and I can't imagine how he is going to tie it all together by the end. I would say though that these have been my favorite fantasy books I've read so far. The Stormlight books have also been fantastic so far. But the Malazan world is so different and complex and I dunno, I don't understand how he conceived and executed the whole idea.

Wheel of Time is great too, Robert Jordan has some woman/gender issues which can be really annoying because all the women are total fucking bitches except for Min, and he'll spend an entire page going on about how impossible it is for the genders to understand each other, like once per chapter. And I always felt like there was a bit of emotional distance, like the way the characters acted wasn't entirely realistic or fully fleshed out. When Brandon Sanderson took over when he died, all the characters became more awesome and relatable. There are actually 14 books, but yeah it goes quickly. I've read the whole series 3 times since I was 15, except the last 3 books, I've only read them twice. I think I started reading them when he was only on like the 6th one or something. I about cried when I heard Robert Jordan died, and apparently he didn't want anyone else to write the rest, but his wife made the executive decision to have Brandon Sanderson do it, and good thing because he did an amazing job and it would have been such a damn shame to leave it unfinished.

I personally love the Sword of Truth, the rhetoric can get a little repetitive but the characters are beautiful and also the way human nobility is described contrasted with the opposite is powerful.

Every fantasy book I've ever read has been a breeze to get through compared to Malazan. They're pretty heavy books. But totally great. Which one are you on? IMO the 6th one is where it really starts to get into it.
 
Also it's my birthday tomorrow... the big three four. What the fuck... at least people don't usually believe me because I look young for my age still. I get carded still like half the time for alcohol. I have a number of gray beard hairs though. My girlfriend calls me an old man (she's 30, she actually has quite a bit of gray hair though, ironically). In any case, I still feel young although my joints are stiffer than they once were. My inner child is right out there at the forefront... I can't see that changing. :)
 
I had the opportunity of designing a summer camp program and being a counselor. I finished the first week's schedule today. I'm going to have as much fun as anyone, and I'm almost jealous I didn't have anything this cool when I was a kid! Needless to say, my inner child is romping in the sandbox right now.
 
My inner child smoked and drank a bit much the last few days and got kinda panicked from just random shit being chaotic (everything complicates endlessly and feel like sisyphus), but picked my child-self up today.. :) Tomorrow on a trip with the co-workers from the art academy, destination secret... pretty damn social but they are sweet people so it will be fine and I'm sure quite unlike going to a theme park with a bunch of [domestic] drug-forum heads I don't know and taking 2C-B etc... lol that was a little awkward.

I don't really know how I will work myself up to a normal job if basic frustrations and uncertainties can freak me out so much... that shit worries me a lot more than the assessment I will be doing next week for a traineeship that seems very much like the type of IQ test i once did well at (i.e. number series etc). Maybe lay off the haze a bit though...

Glad I seem to have the pests of my plants under control for now!!

I look forward to just taking some acid and listening to Merriweather Post Pavillion, especially in summer weather (and summertime clothes)... last time I just started hiking/wandering, got lost on golf course, sat down meditated, drew this:

NSFW:

antlers30027_2.jpg

 
I look forward to just taking some acid and listening to Merriweather Post Pavillion, especially in summer weather (and summertime clothes)
Dude fuck yeah, AC. MWPP is such a poppy album, so accessible yet so undeniably trippy. Arguably the peak era of Animal Collective.

My inner child is gonna feel sorry for himself and wallow in his sorrow tonight.
 
awesome drawing, soli!

what's making you feel down, cg?

me right now in my modus operandi of smoking bowls and listening to nujabes...

 
My constant cycle of heartbreak. I don't really feel like divulging anything more than that I'm afraid.
 
Plan on dropping tonight:) Its been 5-6 days. I'm probably going to need 300ug.

Also have some DANK buds in my possession. So... maybe 200ug and cannabis thrown in will equal it out.
 
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