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☮ Social ☮ PD Social: swirling into homeostasis

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My life is at a tipping point right now. I either fall hard, never to approach this mountain again, or continue on this final struggle no matter the pain it may cause. I hate feeling like I know what I need to get done, but everything feels almost predestined (no matter how much this attitude sways from my beliefs). I feel like no matter what I will try and do, it will fail. I mean, you are what you project on to the world. I've projected nothing, but large lakes of dreams, that are really stagnate puddles. Water that never really goes anywhere, but still resembles what all that could have been. I've never been satisfied with anything I've ever done in my life. I've given up on everything I've tired. I can never get past this point. Honestly it is bringing tears to my eyes.

For as long as I remember (2-4 years old) I've felt isolated, stuck in this piece of shit world, like a rotting fish.

Well, I bought myself a new slide for the bong. gonna try and enjoy it. NIN<3

sorry for that lame post, I just need to rant and let some stuff out.
 
I can relate to your feelings, cloudy. *hug* Especially feelings of being "stuck" in this world.

I was disappointed to see the news about the Marijuana/Cali thing this morning. Not that I really expected otherwise. But the world we live in (or rather, the PEOPLE in the world we live in, at least here) are disappointing and depressing.

Other news... still sick. God, bad head colds suck. They aren't deadly enough to send you to the hospital or put you out of consciousness but they are painful enough to leave you completely incapable of doing anything.

MM's computer broke so he probably won't be around for awhile... he wants a break from electronics and the net.

Uhhh yeah. Not much to say but hope everyone is doing well. I'm just trying to post more because you guys say girls never post here, hehehe. <3
 
Ben So Furry said:
Misery turns to elation super Spurs go marching on:

Spurs 3 : Inter Milan 1

Happy, happy days. I could marry Gareth Bale, also did you see the press having a go at Harry for saying the Man U game was a travesty. MU even have the press in their pockets, it was a travesty and it's time something was done, we have been robbed of goals and 3 points at Old Trafford far too many times, it's ridiculous.
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Last night was my greatest night as a Spurs fan i think. Never felt such euphoria and pride, gutted I wasn't there. Hearing ouyr fans chanting over the commentary after out singing the inter fans in milan...brilliant. The whole team was fantastic (Hutton was a bit hit and miss lol) Kaboul and Gallas were monsters at the back, BAE had a great perfomance. Huddlestone had no lapses in concentration, kept it simple and most importantly, good. Modric was magical, Lennon seems to be rediscovering his form, VdV was great, Bale was... indescribably good. Crouch had his best game in a long time, shame about that volley though.

I'm just ignoring all the bullshit from gooner and MU fans, nothing can take that night away from me haha
 
Cloudy said:
My life is at a tipping point right now. I either fall hard, never to approach this mountain again, or continue on this final struggle no matter the pain it may cause. I hate feeling like I know what I need to get done, but everything feels almost predestined (no matter how much this attitude sways from my beliefs). I feel like no matter what I will try and do, it will fail. I mean, you are what you project on to the world. I've projected nothing, but large lakes of dreams, that are really stagnate puddles. Water that never really goes anywhere, but still resembles what all that could have been. I've never been satisfied with anything I've ever done in my life. I've given up on everything I've tired. I can never get past this point. Honestly it is bringing tears to my eyes.

For as long as I remember (2-4 years old) I've felt isolated, stuck in this piece of shit world, like a rotting fish.

Well, I bought myself a new slide for the bong. gonna try and enjoy it. NIN<3

sorry for that lame post, I just need to rant and let some stuff out.
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Yep. That's all I have to comment on about that. Right now I've decided to keep climbing the mountain. And it definitely causes pain.
 
Anyone else been following the k-hole controversy over at the methoxetamine thread? Pretty interesting stuff, even if it has almost nothing to do with methoxetamine.
 
Xorkoth said:
Another passionate battle over semantics. 8)
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Yeah, gotta love the endless wars over terminology. Maybe we should create a Big & Dandy PDers Debating About Irrelevant Shit, then invite Teo back to post there ;)
 
Hey guys. So, I had a bit of an incident. I took too much LSD on Halloween and tripped a nut, don't remember any of the trip, but wound up in the hospital. I remember up until I was dropped off at a park for 15 minutes while my friend went to pick up their phone charger, and when they came back, I was missing. They found me in a parked car because all the windows were steamed up, because my body temp was so high. I had totally ripped apart the inside of the car (ripped down the rear view mirror, glove box, punched through the windshield etc.) and it turned out to be your stereotypical, common LSD myth of the user running around naked in the street and getting arrested. However, I actually got arrested, and actually ran around naked in the street =D It's a serious situation, and I'm in a lot of trouble, but I thought I'd share that with you guys.
 
MescalitoBandito said:
Hey, what's wrong with a little intellectual masturbation?
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I've always wondered; what kind of thinking is not intellectual masturbation?

I just hear that phrase a lot and can't think of it's actual definition.

zebigmonst3r said:
Hey guys. So, I had a bit of an incident. I took too much LSD on Halloween and tripped a nut, don't remember any of the trip, but wound up in the hospital. I remember up until I was dropped off at a park for 15 minutes while my friend went to pick up their phone charger, and when they came back, I was missing. They found me in a parked car because all the windows were steamed up, because my body temp was so high. I had totally ripped apart the inside of the car (ripped down the rear view mirror, glove box, punched through the windshield etc.) and it turned out to be your stereotypical, common LSD myth of the user running around naked in the street and getting arrested. However, I actually got arrested, and actually ran around naked in the street =D It's a serious situation, and I'm in a lot of trouble, but I thought I'd share that with you guys.
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Damn man. I guess it's good that you're psychologically okay.

I never quite understood how that happens; blacking out and going crazy on a psych like that just isn't something that's ever happened to me nor can I think of how it could.

It sounds like a cliche thing to happen, but oddly enough it actually is common. I've read of it more than once on these forums. Swilow has experience with that situation.
 
I took some phenibut today. It doesn't quite work as well for me as it used to. I only took 0.7g along with 1.5g of kava and it made my muscles all achey, gave me an annoying headache, and makes focusing my eyes really hard and labourous.

I took 25ug of LSD and went and played some golf. The L was nice, makes my thoughts flow and heightens the senses. I'm really starting to get good at golf, best I've played in my life. When I got back in though the phenibut headache and muscle pains were really getting to me so I did some stretching and took some diazepam.

Must say, I've got an interesting kind of buzz going; quite pleasurable. :)
 
I'm going to try to be sober for one week at least here. Baby steps. So til 11/10/2010 no drogas. Almost said "except for weed!" but I know where that goes :P
 
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