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Aight daddy-o, I'm trying to imagine what a hot stone massage would feel like... maybe cuz it's hot out today that doesn't sound too appealing, now a cool hand massage I could go for.


Do you ever get the feeling you should take a psych after taking a psych? It seems like it could be a wasteful/potentially unwise thing to do. Oh well, let's find out. I'm feelin' lucky.

edit: Did you ever immediately regret a decision after making it, like say, the above sentences ^. Yeah well taking IV 4-aco-dmt while on 2c-e sounded like an awesome idea (tryptamine flash+synesthesia of a phen, yes please) but I didn't consider that I might miss the shot. You'd think that wouldn't matter with this sort of thing, but all my old opiate addict "Oh fuck I missed my shot!" emotions came out right away and it's proving difficult to redirect them towards positivity. I hit a nerve too cuz my arm's sore as fuck. It's gonna be a long night, I can tell. :|
 
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I was a little ticklish and squirmy when i started getting them, now its just pure relaxation.

Its weird, at first you seem to descend into an infantile state of tickly squirmyness, but after a while its just pure relaxation.

Massage can be quite spiritual. :)



And it just feels nice to be touched, rubbed, squeezed etc

;)

So- I went a bit nuts earlier; just mega cravings for dope; I left my friend some methadone, which I drove around to collect. She kindly asked me to reconsider, a proposition I was not willing to endorse; however: she then proposed that we a) drop acid, and then she would give me the methadone if I still wanted it and b) that we should make passionate love <3 I heartily embraced both options, so we took the acid, adjourned and enjoyed each other. Interesting, 'no strings attached' sex. And thusly, the acid kicked in, and the dope cravings turned into something academic which I couldn't justify, and emotionally didn't want....And so I have remained opiate free for 120 hours and feel pretty damn stoked.

I've now come home with a shiteating smile on my dial and a bag of ketamine; all is well :) <3

The only thing; I feel a bit weird, as my friend is just 18 and I'm 28; but she's a damn cool girl, very worldly, creative and very gorgeous....I just hope we can keep the strings de-tached....

Anyhow, tra la la, the Neal Young song you posted early Delsyd is really really good; somewhat haunting but rather beautiful.

Peace <3 :) <3 :)
 
"Oh fuck I missed my shot!"

I've seriously cried after that, even if I had more gear. Its just a horrid feeling.

But you can tell yourself (now) that it doesn't matter...Just chillax and enjoy the night; I'm gonna be up and posting in here so stay awake with me, NKB :)
 
Things very negative. Funny actually, it was last April that I had a disastrous trip that prevented me from really enjoying psychedelics until I ended my three month psych fast two weeks ago, and here we are in April again. I mean, I've managed to calm myself enough that we're not going into that territory, but now I've started thinking about how I'm just as unemployed and directionless now as I was then...and hasn't my recent turn towards positivity just been based off of nothing but delusion?


edit: I think I'm going to drink until I can fall asleep/pass out now...that seems like the best thing to do. That way I can sleep this off, and try fruitlessly again to gain reliable income. And when that eventually happens, I can become an addict again. Because let's not kid ourselves, that's what is going to happen unless I tragically die in the meantime.
 
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Hey guys. Sorry, I was sure I already replied, I must have never hit the post button, was still coming down a little at the time.

My trip was utterly amazing. There were a few rough parts as usual but I think my mindset has definitely changed and I'm now in the right state to finally make the changes the trip suggested would be good.

Was an awesome place to trip too (in a forest), found some cool stuff, took some nice pictures (might post some later :) ) and made some videos for my girlfriend about my trip :)

I'm very happy right now. Much love guys :)
 
Its weird, at first you seem to descend into an infantile state of tickly squirmyness, but after a while its just pure relaxation.

Massage can be quite spiritual. :)



...

Anyhow, tra la la, the Neal Young song you posted early Delsyd is really really good; somewhat haunting but rather beautiful.

Peace <3 :) <3 :)

Massage is great in many ways, i feel blessed.
Music sounds awesome while being massaged. I love putting on some Emancipator or Bonobo for my massages (or a Dead mix that Erin made).

Congrats on being dope free my cosmic brother.
Im so happy for you.<3
Ive been able to keep my use to just a few times in the past year despite it being pretty easily available and i dont see myself ever going back to to cycle of using for long periods of time, then sickness, rinse and repeat.
 
^It still kicks it :) How are you feeling today Nearjat?

And oh ooh oh ooh, I just received some Methoxetamine!!! It was literally given to me as "methketamine" :| Still, my first try with it; how much? (I have a lot now...)

Also some PCP, all courtesy of my young lady friend. And a blowjob, but thats private ;) <3 Damn opiate withdrawal and the need for sex and the ability to blow in about 3ms. Still. Good.
 
Sounds like a good time Swirlow. Good oral is probably my favorite sex act, and i like to give as much as receive.

I should be having my "methketamine":) after this weekend. It Made it to the states already, just not my state yet :(, monday if im lucky :)

For a first try probably 20mg.
50mg seems to give people with little dissociative tolerance a full dissociative experience. Others with tolerance seem to be using 100mg+.
If you have a lot just start off low and work up.

It is supposed to be more potent mg for mg than ketamine.
 
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