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☮ Social ☮ [PD Social General Talk Thread] Observation Tank for Fractallized Redundancy Modules

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If I got hold of some more DMT, I'd definitely look into what's required to IM it. It's my preferred ROA if available (which is rare with the substances I use).

Actually on that note, would IM DOC be ill advised?
 
i.m. DOC probably probaably doesn't make much of a difference except for slightly speeding up the comeup ... not even by enough to be worth the effort ... the lighter phenethylamines (TR/discussion on 2CD and others there), however, are pretty rewarding IME by this RoA

prepping is easy and OTC. if you got reasonably pure DMT freebase the quick and dirty way is to just acidify it (just like our British cousins must do with their heroin, citric acid probably being a good choice), being careful with the pH balance because otherwise it is going to hurt quite a bit and potentially damage muscle tissue, then wheel filter to remove plant matter etc., and proceed...a fancier and more exact method would be basically to follow this venerable Bluelight classic replacing "crack" with "DMT," passim.
 
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eat too much LSD, fail turing test
 
I went to my first rave last night. Took 100mg 4-FA, while my two buddies took some methylone and reallllyy enjoyed it. Shit was crazy... I'd never been to a club before. There were so many barely legal chicks running around with nothing but a virtual thong covering their lower half, asses hanging out and so tantalizing... the 4-FA had me fiending for pussy, I had to fight myself to not pinch girls asses as I walked by hahah. It was an effing blast, the music hit hard and was absorbing, the lights they had were crazy... it was just a great night :) went to a friend's after the club and smoked some dank and cracked some whippets. What a way to close the night! Ended up only getting three hours of sleep, woke up with my pupils still dilated.

Anyways, I had a blast, I intend to go to raves more often now. I don't know why I'd never gone to one before, I've been missing out all these years!
 
Impactful couple of days... I gotta get this out because I feel pretty bad about it inside right now.

So on Thanksgiving we had our traditional friendsgiving, a potluck meal and party with good friends. Me and the band with Adam the guitar player (the unstable one) had a show the day after (last night) and so we decided to come over really early and practice all day and then have them over for the night, so they could join in our friend family Thanksgiving (practice space is in the same house). The practice went very poorly, partly due to equipment issues and party due to lack of focus on Adam's part (ie, being convinced we need to learn new songs a day before the show and not working on any of our existing songs which we needed to incorporate the synthesizer into). Then we had dinner which went great, everyone was happy and welcome and so forth. But then as the night went on, Adam started to get drunk. When that happened, he just decided to get super smashed once he crossed the few drinks threshold (which is common with him and we all dread it). He took a benzo and proceeded to drink everyone's liquor and beer, quickly, without asking. At that point he was smashed and started to get really, really annoying, talking non-stop about himself over everyone and constantly interrupting to do it (this is what he does when he gets really drunk). And then my friend whose house we were in said something totally innocuous to him, it was part of a conversation where he had asked whose children she would give to some goddesses or something random and silly like that, and she picked someone else's hypothetical children instead of his. He fucking lost it, started screaming at her "fuck you", "bitch", etc, getting all aggressive on her. Then the drummer (who is his best friend and basically takes care of him in life) tried to chill him out and defend her, and Adam went off on him, and started accusing him of all kinds of paranoid shit such as that he only uses him for his drum set and doesn't really care about him, etc. So they got in an epic fight too, and the drummer was really hurt by it. After hours of dealing with that, she finally kicked him out of her place, the upstairs, so he went downstairs to the other half of the duplex where my band friends live, and proceeded to annoy everyone there, almost break a bunch of music equipment by stumbling around, talk non-stop about himself, insult a bunch of people, tell everyone he wishes he was dead and might kill himself (to show us), and declare loudly that tomorrow he's leaving forever and won't see any of us ever again and is going to find new people to play music with. He kept my friend who lives there up until almost 6am when he had to work at 8am, because he's homeless right now and has no place to go and was wasted and we wouldn't allow him to drive (obviously), and we didn't want to leave him along unsupervised because shit tends to break or go missing when he's left alone in a space.

It was incredibly annoying and painful for me/us to deal with this... there was such an intense level of anxiety and frustration involved that I hated experiencing. And it's not the first time this has happened, it's the second huge blow-up since I've known him (that I've been there for, the bass player has been there for even more of them) but there have been countless smaller events like this. He's SO hard to be a band with, every single thing is stressful, every practice, every show, the fact that he seems hell-bent and creating a self-fulfilling prophecy for himself, where he feels like everyone he's ever known has abandoned him but then he tries his hardest to alienate people, so he can feel justified in this belief. And a bunch of little things that add up to be infuriating and frustrating. The next morning all he had to say about it was his usual response: "whoa, I took so much alcohol and benzos, I don't remember any of it, isn't that funny? I'm sorry but it's not my fault, you can't hold it against me since I can't remember". I don't even believe he has total blackouts when this happens because you can reference things he said and he'll show he remembers it, as long as you say it in a way where he doesn't realize you're trying to test him. He gets that way so he has an excuse to act like that, and then takes no responsibility. In light of his next morning behavior, me and the bass player decided we were fed up and have had enough. It seems there is no conceivable way that this band will ever be functional and professional enough to be successful and tour and shit like we keep talking about. As the day went on we decided what we needed to do was talk to them about going on a hiatus for a while until they can find a place to live that has a practice space (because the Thanksgiving stunt resulted in Adam no longer being allowed to be over there at all, and that was our only practice space we ever got to use with this band, and we were lucky if we could do it once a week), and to see whether Adam can get his head on straight. And then let the bartender who books us there (who is amazing and a friend and has been really, really good to both of our bands) know that we're going on hiatus and to not book that band for now, but that our other band is not going on hiatus and we should still do those shows we have lined up.

That was our plan. And she and I had on several occasions vented a bit together about Adam's behavior in recent times. I thought the bass player had already talked to the other guys about the plan, but it turns out he didn't. I wanted to make sure she knew about it before the show was over because usually she comes right after the show and books us for more dates, and if she did that with everyone what would have happened was that they would have said yes and we'd be stuck playing more shows with them when we really shouldn't be playing shows with them now, we're totally unprepared and we have a loose cannon who is an embarrassment on stage (due to what he says, not his playing). So, I brought it up to her. She seemed a little put off by it, which I noticed for sure, but didn't think much of it and we started playing. The show actually went pretty well other than Adam always announcing how we fucked up or that the song we just played was "sketchy", sorry, etc, even though the crowd was whooping and totally into it. Then after the show we packed up and we were all heading over to a nearby house to post-party. They took longer to get there, but when they arrived, Adam pulled me into the kitchen to talk to me (sober for once).

He said that the bartender told them what I said and she thought it was really sketchy. And what she communicated to them was not what I was trying to communicate to her, she basically thought I was trying to disband this band and make a power play with my other band to replace them. When she found out we hadn't talked to them yet about the plan (which was true even though I thought they'd been talked to by my friend already) it seemed to verify it for her. So she told Adam that she's going to keep booking him and the drummer and not me and the bass player, and that she's not going to book our other band anymore because she doesn't want to deal with people like that. I feel really bad that it came off that way because it was not what I was trying to say, I was trying to say that we're taking a break to let them get their shit together so we can come back prepared and ready to be serious about it, and that the same is not true of my other band, we're still ready to play the shows we have scheduled for January. So now she thinks poorly of me and the bass player which makes me feel the worst out of this whole thing because she's awesome, and a friend, and she's been really, really nice and cool and helpful to us. I feel really weird about it, guilty and kind of ashamed even though what she thinks is not what I was actually doing. But I realize I made a mistake, straight up, in the way I introduced the idea to her. I was careless with my words... I was coming from a place of extreme frustration at Adam and I was emboldened by the fact that she and I had vented about Adam before... hell, she even said once that if he doesn't get his shit together she is gonna have to stop booking us. But I was too cavalier and this is the result.

Next Adam said that me and the bass player are done playing music with them, that this is over, because they refuse to deal with people who would do something like this. He was really hurt (he considers me the only person around here who gets him at all and it hurt him that I would do that). I explained to him where I was coming from and what I was actually trying to communicate to the bartender... I told him how much it hurts that he behaves the way he does, and that I feel like it's holding the band back. I told him I have nothing but love and respect for him and I respect his decision on this, and that maybe energetically we're just not right to be in a band together because it feels so hard all the time. The conversation went really well, there was hugging and mutual respect, and afterwards we all hung out and laughed together and conversed and so forth. However through it all he continued to take no responsibility for his actions the night before or any of the other times, he really was not getting it, just kept using the "I was blacked out and don't remember so it's not really my fault" excuse, so I felt alright about parting ways as a band. I also found out he had already lined up new players to replace me and the bass player, prior to this, so I guess he was organizing things behind our backs too. So, I think it's for the best. Being in that band (or dealing with Adam actually) is the highest level of stress of anything I have dealt with in my life recently, consistently. And I really don't want to have band practice 6 days a week because of being in 2 bands, especially since my girlfriend is about to come back from California and I want to have time to spend with her. So it's probably the right move, and I think the chances of the band actually being successful, at least at this point in his life, are virtually zero. He is just a mess... he believes bad things just always happen to him but he makes them all happen... last time he was in town, he ended up homeless and jobless and broke... this time, he just recently got evicted again and has alienated most of his friends and is living in his van... he's frequently late for work, he has another warrant out for his arrest, it's like, homeless and broke and in trouble is how he always ends up. He's too unstable to be in a band with. I love the guy, I really do, but enough is enough. At this point it's toxic for me personally to be in that band and I've felt that way for a little while now, and so does the bass player, we were talking about it all day yesterday before this happened.

Still, it really hurts and the way it went down makes me feel very weird and bad. And I seemed to have burned a bridge with the place we'd been playing shows at the most often. I'm gonna try to send her a facebook message explaining my intentions and apologizing for how I went about it... even if it doesn't result in my other band (I guess my band, singular, now) getting booked there anymore, I just consider her a friend, and I see her around at shows and stuff, and I don't want her to think of me the way she's thinking of me now. I really did have a lapse in judgment about how to bring up and deal with this situation with her, and now I have to deal with that internally. Doesn't feel good. :\
 
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Well as a follow-up... yesterday was rough, I felt really bad all day. Then I talked to my bass player friend about it and we both came to the conclusion we're relieved and now we can focus on other projects more... for example his successful rapper friend in south dakota wants very badly for us to record beats for him to rap on and include us in his album that way. Plenty of stuff to do. I got ahold of the bartender I mentioned who books us and I have a time to meet her to talk about what happened... just to explain my position and what I had meant to communicate. So far the communication with her has been pretty normal, she really wanted to talk to me too because she didn't think I really would have been underhanded like that. So, I think it's all worked out as it needed to. It still hurt though, I feel like I just ended a relationship with someone I really loved but where it's decidedly better off that it ends, where I got dumped but I was wanting to dump them and just got beaten to the punch. .
 
Wow, man. That's a ridiculous situation that got even more frustrating. Sometimes you find yourself in a place that requires uncomfortable decisions and actions. I hope things improve for you in that music scene. In the end, though, it sounds like you are better off for it.
 
Shit Xorkoth, that's all kinds of messed up :( but as JAG said, no matter the immediate impact, it seems it was the best decision and you'll come out on top :)


In other news, another poor silly girl has gone and got herself killed at a festival here over the weekend, paving the way for the ignorant masses with a voice to spew their uneducated opinion all over social media on why drugz are bad and people don't need drugs to have fun blah blah fucking blah would love to blanket prohibit alcohol consumption completely for just one single week to show how hypocritical that statement is. Pretty sure the world's nightclub industry would crash and burn overnight, literally.

But you don't need alcohol to have fun either.

/rant.
 
I wanted to share something funny that happened the other night.

I was sitting around the house on the computer around 10pm and had the urge to take the LSD I had left simply out of boredom. The world had other plans for me though, about 5 minutes before dropping someone knocked on the door. A friend I hadn't seen in 6 months showed up out of the blue and ended up staying for a few hours. I decided to find the remote to the TV that I had lost early in the week so that we could watch something on netflix. In my search for it I woke up a hornet that had come into the house to ride out the winter and it ended up on my foot (didn't feel it because I had heavy socks on). I got stung three of four times through my sock before I figured out what was going on. I was hopping around on one foot yelling "kill it kill it!" while my friend beat it to death with his boot.

The damn thing survived and I ended up having to lop its head off with a knife to finally put it out of its misery. My foot is still pretty swollen two days later and while it no longer hurts it itches like mad. I decided that taking LSD with an itchy foot would probably lead to a bad time so it still sits in my drawer for use at a later time.

Tonight I got a txt message from another friend: "Save those tabs, I picked up some MDMA for you since you said you wanted to have your first candy flip".

Funny how things work out. Reckon I'll stick to the initial plan and save it for New Years. :)
 
Nice man. :)

Oh man, hornets and wasps are intense. That reminds me of a time I was on my roof, doing some maintenance, and I hammered near a seam in the flushing (I think that's what it's called, the metal strip over the edge of the roof) and it turns out there was a hive in there... probably about a dozen wasps came swarming out and buzzing threateningly around me. I flinched back and one of them buried its stinger in the wood where my hand had been milliseconds before. I was up on a very high and rather steep roof and they were coming right for me. I had been taping/nailing up a sheet of construction plastic over the top of my roof to cover up a leak, so I quickly slid under it and pulled it down over me, in the process/panic I skinned up my elbows pretty bad. But miraculously they didn't figure out how to get in. I stayed there for like 20 minutes before I peeked out and then got the fuck off the roof.
 
I just found out that my girl is most likely going to visit her mom before coming home and if she does, I won't get to see her before I go visit my family, and I won't be back til New Year's. She decided she would come with me (her family doesn't celebrate Christmas and she really wants to see what that's like and spend the holiday with me and people who are festive), but her sister is coming to visit her then, which she just found out. So I probably won't get to see her for another month. :( It wasn't bad at first but I'm starting to really miss her a lot. She's been gone for a month and a half already, if she sees her mom then it's 2 and a half months total. I told her I really miss her but that if it works out to see her mom (depends on several factors because her mom lives in Hawaii and she gets cheap standby flights because her brother works for the airline) that she should do it because that's really important and she hasn't seen her in over 3 years. But I wanted to be like "come back!!"

But on the upside we had a really nice and sweet conversation about it.
 
Xorkoth said:
Anyone know if this is for real? http://themindunleashed.org/2015/05...south-africa-could-rewrite-human-history.html
Click to expand...

*crickets*
Well its compelling evidence, especially if I saw it on Google Earth myself, and I wouldn't be surprised to find ancient civilizations, after all humans have walked for over a million years in this form, so I can imagine at least in isolated areas, some of us were smart enough to get with the program.
But it is also kind of like saying the rock on Mars that looks like a face must be a statue of a face.
 
Xorkoth said:
Anyone know if this is for real? http://themindunleashed.org/2015/05...south-africa-could-rewrite-human-history.html
Click to expand...

"The geology of the site is quite interesting too because of the numerous gold mines located in the area. According to researchers, this ancient civilization could have practiced gold mining."

the conspiracy theorist in me thinks that maybe this was one of the supposed ancient gold mining colonies that aliens started using genetically engineered humans.
 
Girlfriend had a job interview for a position in my building yesterday... Hmmm hahaha

Good morning everyone!
 
Been cleaning my house some more... on 3-MeO-PCP again too, strange to find myself here again. I'm getting down to the bottom of it (close to done) and almost everything is bringing up memories. I feel like I'm confronting my past and throwing it away, or recovering it, whichever seems appropriate. Lots of stuff to throw away in there though. Man, my life was weird and sad for a while. I'm really thankful I've gotten out of that, but it's unnerving having it in my face again. I have to think the pile-up I let happen in parts of my house is symbolic of repressing how truly unwell I was, and now I'm finally doing some cleaning.

It's weird living with and being with someone who's not right in the head for so long... I can't believe how much of that I took for normal. It creeps me out now that I have distance...

I've also found some great things from even longer ago that I forgot all about, that's been pleasant.

These 3-MeO-PCP cleaning sessions are intense.
 
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