Yup I guess we can agree on the semantics.. 'more money can't buy happiness' is virtually the same technical change to the adage I had in mind today as well..
When I get pretty poor I can go into a really restrained mode and I pretty much don't allow myself to buy anything extra. That worked in the past.. right now I am getting some extra support through family and my growing practices and experimenting are kinda demanding the extra money.
Although I have no way to properly check this I think my psychiatry causes me to not be spoiled in traditional senses but am indeed at a certain comfort level and I am unable to manage in a more desolate situation. Fuck, I mean even just my attention deficit probably costs quite a bit of extra money, the very simplest of examples just being that i lose or forget a lot of shit..
Anyways I am not complaining, it's a minor miracle that I am holding up and even sort of happy.
Fuck, I did get a bunch of lye in my face tonight because of some decades old container of it just attracting that much moisture and degrading, the whole thing just going apart when picking up and the hydrated contents splashing right in my schnoz... I'm lucky I am not scarred or blind I guess, it seemed like an appropriate amount to neutralize with vinegar.
@ the tripping part or not really: I have quit weed and I don't think around these times there will be much more than 2C-C being tripped on either.. I feel like I just need to have enough to do the coming 3 or so days. Man you can quit almost anything by having the proper techniques to go 3 or so days without doing anything. Getting off opium was not "difficult" per se but it did feel like having 5 x the flu and I could manage simply because someone was around. I can have plenty to do the coming 3 days including plenty outside of my own home but it does involve the choice of going out rather than retreating in my cave and pacifying myself with weed etc. Fuck if only I could afford or source some decent (and organic) weed.
Another thing is I probably need to unload.. my prescribed dexamph works great but gets me worked up and over time I build up more anxieties I think.. it also disinhibits me especially at the end of the day when I have less willpower due to becoming scatterbrained while the energy hasn't left me. I can use some extra days off it so I can start over with that shit and hopefully cut it out a bit earlier next time.
Man it would probably be a win if I could figure out what the XR formulation of it is so that i can fuck that up and make it instant again. (Instant release dex is not covered here and is being monopolized by big pharma it seems. I am getting magistrally prepared XR which about 1 healthcare insurer is covering

but hey don't a look a gift horse in the mouth when it is a pinata full of amphetamines. It seems like I get another envelope in the mail before I feel like I am even half done with my current script.)
[hey wtf why are special characters not recognized]