I'm going to answer these opposite the order they were asked in because I think the explanations will flow better that way....
Yes, I'd never heard this one. Interesting. I love how diverse our kinks can be. Human sexuality is so incredibly broad.
Kaleida, how does this manifest for you? How did you discover this fetish?
I am not a massive fan of experiencing pain. I have tried several things, and its worked at times, but more often than not is just painful. OTOH, my partner finds it very engaging. Spanking of inner thigh and butt, face-slapping and bondage works wonders.
I was much more sexually aggressive when I was younger, I just wanted to have complete control and fuck the shit out of my partner until they helplessly exploded. My sexuality is now more organic, I just want to cum as deeply as I can in whatever body part I am in after ensuring that her body is well satisfied
Isn't having a physical form amazing? :D
Yeah, it's a pretty fascinating subject.
I enjoy trying to figure out how it all works and what causes which things to overlap with which other things almost as much as I enjoy doing the same with psychedelics. The human brain in general, and really just brains period, are just too damn intriguing.
I remember quite vividly how this fetish started and exactly where it came from. I recall that I was visiting my cousins as a child and they were watching the movie Casper Meets Wendy. In that movie, there is a scene where the witches magically transform a woman into a goat against her wishes. As I said I had no idea what sex was at the time, but I was already actively masturbating. When I first discovered myself in that way I became obsessed with it as a means to achieve a brief out-of-body experience, as that was what had happened during my first orgasms when I was deep in fantasy, very basic and plotless scenes if I'm not mistaken. I was already familiar with the sensation from having had a few spontaneous experiences while zoning out in loud rooms, leading to points where I was dissociated enough to be walking through dream scenes and other kids would be yelling my name to try to bring me out of it. I was delighted to have found a way to induce these same kinds of feelings willingly finally, but I was still kind of aimless with it because I didn't understand it. I want to say that I think probably the most likely reason I latched on to the transformation fantasy as readily as I did is because it both had this magical or fantasy edge to it as I felt my out-of-body experiences were and it actually added the first real sign of a power relationship to my fantasies, as the woman being submissive and the witches being dominant.
The first time I tried the fantasy was basically just mimicking the scene from the movie, and I found that I liked it so I started branching out from there. Throughout my early childhood it's a bit harder to remember an overly large number of exact details of course, but only thing that really sticks out significantly in my memory is that I had lots of animal transformation fantasies specifically. Nothing like furries, just stuff like the goat scene but with widely varying contexts and species. I'm pretty sure that the one I liked using the most at this time was a black cat, and I remember feeling like that was because I could relate a lot to the hedonistic behaviors that happy cats exhibited. I couldn't tell you much more about the fantasies from that time though, it was just too long ago and I was too young considering that.
Around when I got to middle school things started to get more diverse. I started developing a genuine sex drive aimed at people, but it took a backseat to the transformation fetish still because it was much easier for me to just get off with that. Still, the themes started to invade my fantasies. Transforming into animals opened up to include transforming into people, which was pretty much exclusively other girls who I both found attractive and envied (for the record, I am a bisexual female and at this point I only felt physically attracted to other girls). I toyed around with some abstractions on the concept too to see what it would like, and certain things did really catch on such as being forcibly transformed into someone else's clothes, like a dress or a bathing suit, which I think hit me especially hard because it deepens the D/S aspect as you literally become their possession, and this one has stuck with me so well that I still use it regularly and I'm getting horny just writing about it. On the other hand, though my animal transformation fantasies did increase probably through high school and expanded to include things like horses and even cows, eventually I just lost interest in them and switched over to only human fantasies. Likewise, there were a lot of different subtypes I tried over the years that each went for a pretty long time themselves, like being turned into statutes or water, or being eaten and digested and absorbed into someone else, but they have pretty much all fallen aside too. They still usually work if I try, but they don't just come to mind anymore. I would say that the only ones that have really survived at a still significant level to this day are just general people transformations through a variety of plots like shapeshifting and possession, and the forced clothing transformations.
These things are all just about the contexts in which my transformation fantasies generally take place though, which like all types of fantasies are essentially limitless. To really understand what makes the transformation fetish what it is, you need to understand what binds all of these fantasies together: the act of transforming itself. This is absolutely, 100% of the time, not only the most important aspect of the fantasy, but also the moment of orgasm. There is no actual sexual content necessary in a transformation fantasy to reach this point, just the physical stimulation required to make the fantasy matter.
Personally, my best guess is that something about the act of visualizing your transformation in your mind rapidly and potently engages brain structures that are also involved in the reward system, and that's why the orgasm always occurs at that moment when combined with enough synergistic stimulation. It would also seem to make sense to me with the fact that it seems like the more aspects of myself I imagine transforming at once, physical and psychological alike, the more satisfying the orgasm is, and though there is a lot of build up to it, the transformation visualization itself is incredibly fast and smooth, almost like it's an automated process that the brain is just already ready for. At least, this has been my experience with it so far.
I actually have a bit more to say on that subject too, but it begins to dip into the answer to TAC's question so I will save it for below.
And yeah, bodies are pretty great... but so is leaving them behind.
Transformation fetish... I had to look that one up. Interesting. What role do psychedelics play in transformation for you, specifically?
So, picking up where I left off with the above....
Remember that ego death I described recently from meditation and cannabis? Well, as I said, it was initiated with building up visuals and a rising orgasmic tension, and then I just released into the bliss.... And what, again, was very first thing I saw emerge out of the brilliantly white void? Yup, that's right.... A body rapidly transforming through countless identities, all women who I both found attractive and identified with. And what was I doing immediately as I finally stuck with one identity and a dream scene formed? Having sex. And as soon as the fantasy broke and I returned to reality I began laughing just like when coming out of any other deep void.
Psychedelics, then, are just the next step up. They have forced transformations in me many times, and they feel exactly they do in my fantasies except effortless, unexpected, and so vivid that they overlap reality. Interestingly though, while these theme is not overly present in my sexual fantasies on their own and played no role in the above cannabis experience, on psychedelics I so far have almost invariably transformed into an actor from a live-action TV show I'm regularly watching at the time of the trip. This seems to be the primary driving factor and not something like novelty, because it's true even if it's like my twentieth time watching the show. What's really interesting about this too is that since I don't just pick who I transform into like I do when fantasizing, I often find myself realizing that I relate to people who might have never even occurred to me and/or in ways I hadn't previously considered. And, in addition to of course just making me really horny with all that going on, they even bring brief orgasmic sensations whenever they come, just like in the fantasy. So of course these strong trips seem quite erotic to me!
For what it's worth, I think this is the same effect that anyone can experience too. It just goes back to what I said about this relating to strong reward system stimulation.... Delusions of grandeur like thinking you're a movie star are also reported in states that strongly implicate these systems such as psychotic bipolar mania. Likewise, it's not uncommon for people to describe flashing through different lives on psychedelics while experiencing strong feelings like infinite love that could also relate of strong reward activation, and for me this seems even more common on the same psychedelics that are more heavily oriented towards manic euphoria or likely to cause spontaneous orgasms, like just recently it happened to me readily and repeatedly on AL-LAD. Perhaps I was also just more likely to develop these desires due to my previously mentioned tendency towards hypomania. Nonetheless, these thoughts also lead me to suspect that probably anyone could enjoy a transformation fantasy under the right circumstance, even if it's harder than other fantasies for them.
Does that answer your questions?
![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
