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Painting Eden.

rewiiired

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 20, 2002
Messages
1,802
Location
Chair.
Beady eyes
locked with mine, spilling
over into, drawing in my mind,
now I'm ensnared in a dream of your own making,
convinced of its reality,

petrified, immobilized by scenes
of devastation, death, insane catastrophe,
chaos reining down relentlessly upon a world
without an umbrella to speak of,
so darkness falls, then naturally,
you step in, save the day,

you paint it in Eden,
but you're not gods.
There are no gods.

You're not saviors.
You use us to save yourselves.

And I'm not buying this
scare tactic,
I'm not cashing in,
not investing,

and I try and not feel
the visions stain my wild
and spinning inner eye...

I've got to wake up.
Got to wake up.
 
I liked your vocabulary man, I'm trying to give more criticism than just saying a like stuff in this forum now haha. I think this would benefit maybe from expanding on some of the images you put out, I liked the mention of the umbrella. Maybe parallel this with a downpour without an umbrella more? I'm a strong believer in imagery being very important.

Very good though :)
 
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