Opiate addiction - self-managed tapering

[NJ2NYC2NJ]

I cracked today... I just opened up a half-liter of Zywiec Porter.... And goddamn, does it taste good.

I'm still experiencing intermittent diarrhea, mood swings, lethargy, as well as the generalized anxiety/depression I mentioned earlier in the thread.

(For those of you too lazy to read the entire thread) I've been on amitriptyline for the past 4 months or so... While I was on methadone treatment, the amitriptyline helped me with sleep... But now that I've been off of methadone for three weeks, and haven't had suboxone for over a week, it seems everything has been thrown off kilter and i haven't had a restorative session of sleep for what seems like 10 or 12 days.

Bottle number two of the Zywiec... Mmmm.... Even tastier than the first.

 

[Tchort]

Some believe that many people with treatment resistant depression are suffering from an imbalance of Endorphins rather than Seratonin, Dopamine or Norepinephrine. LDN (Low Dose Naltrexone) has been used for the past several years in small studies and individual experiments with some success.

Maybe once you are completely past the physical withdrawals you can check out LDN? Naltrexone has been proven to repair the brains endorphin system after its been damaged by opioid addiction and abuse. Normally I recommend Methadone or Buprenorphine maintenance, but if these two treatments do not work well for you, symptomatic treatment with non-opioid medications and LDN are really the best option.

http://www.prohibitionkills.com/

If you've tried opiates/opioids, and already know they can make you feel 'normal', that’s another confirmation that listening to me is a good idea.
The key concept here for you to understand, is that by consuming opioids from an external source, you are properly compensating for your endogenous opioid deficiency by consuming a substance that is nearly identical to what your body is lacking.

The link above has a long article about Endorphin Deficiency Syndrome and LDN treatment for it.

 

[malfunkshun]

OP: why would you want to get on suboxone when you are practically clean? hell, you've kicked heroin and now you've kicked methadone, you don't need to get on suboxone. from what you've said it doesn't sound like you're experiencing gut wrenching withdrawals, just the after effects... paws, i think is what it's called.

i too found old 'scrapings' in the form of poppy pod dust that had accumulated inside my grinder, when I kicked my poppy seed tea and poppy pod habit (temporarily) about 3 years ago, so I know what you're going through. after the physical wd's were finished, just dealing with life afterward seemed almost unendurable. you need to stick that out though.

my advice for what it's worth would be, if possible, to get hold of some valium or xanax or klonopin or some other kind of anxiety reducing drug and just take that before you go to bed to help you sleep.

 

[NJ2NYC2NJ]

The original psychological issues that caused me to seek relief in the form of heroin, my depression/anxiety, are obviously still present... And having spent 5 years suppressing those issues through drug use has probably exacerbated the depression/anxiety, so now that I'm finally starting to lift the veil from over my eyes, the depression/anxiety are starting to flood into my sober consciousness, which is making day-to-day life barely tolerable.

I think it's almost inevitable that I'll have to see a psychiatrist and experiment with various combinations of anti-depressants and anti-anxiety medications until I find something that works. I honestly hope I find something (legal) that works for me... Otherwise, I'll probably end up screwing around with opiates again.

 

[johanneschimpo]

I did that.
After going from being addicted to chipping to practically no use, I got on suboxone anyway. The reason why I did, when I was "practically clean," was I knew that without it I would eventually, whether it was a week or a year, go back to using heroin if I didn't get on maintenance (and I prefer suboxone 100x over methadone).

 

[NJ2NYC2NJ]

Along with suboxone, were you taking any other medications? I hope you don't take that the wrong way, it has just been my experience that people who attempt to end their opiate addiction often find that they need other medications (i.e., antidepressants, etc) in order to help stabilize themselves, in addition to methadone/suboxone/etc.

UPDATE: Following my little beer binge last night, I had a terribly rough night... Wasn't able to sleep at all... Tossed and turned all night.. Felt a mild headache, and low-level body aches. Even when I popped a klonopin at 03:00, I still could not fall asleep... And klonopin almost always works for me. A terrible night. (It also happened to be my first night without amitriptyline, which may have played a factor)

 

[johanneschimpo]

^ Me?
I'm still on suboxone. Along with benzos for anxiety (exacerbated by years of opiate use, like you mentioned earlier), and soma/tramadol for pain issues. So yes, I have prescriptions now instead of trying to self-medicate (which only made things worse). Actually, I'm on more drugs now than I was before.
Before getting on suboxone, while trying to get/stay clean, I tried various meds: a few anti-depressants, non-benzo anxiety meds, other crap... no results from them, but now I get what I "need" from my current doctor.

 

[NJ2NYC2NJ]

Hmmm... Yeah, I guess I really ought to give suboxone an honest effort. I've never really taken it in earnest, except the couple of tablets that a friend of mine sold me recently, which definitely helped alleviate the more severe withdrawal symptoms. But in conjunction with suboxone, I'm fairly confident that I'll probably also end up taking an antidepressant and/or an anti-anxiety medicine.

I wouldn't be surprised that if, once I'm finally on suboxone, the amitriptyline that I've been taking ends up being all I need for sleep-related issues. With regard to the more serious depression/anxiety conditions, I might need to experiment with what's available and what's been proven effective for cases similar to mine.

Thanks again for your comments and help.