Goddamn, it feels like everyone around here wants to paint me into a fucking corner and no one is actually reading what I'm posting, just assigning the wrong tone to my words and then vilifying me in an overly reductionist manner with the exceptions of a few people like @Perforated
I can empathise. We do make ourselves linchpins you and I. Indeed we disagreed, funded virtually, made peace, accepted each other, and rose above ultimately irrelevant differences which probably wouldn’t stand at all if we all just understood the full truth.
I’ve lost a lot of amigos around here recently by speaking my guts at a time when pandemonium has left the building for me, it’s a challenging, divisive time everywhere you go.
It’s unfortunate that you are not able to have joined this platform at a time of relative peace as I did 2.7 years ago. It’s more like a cat fight now wherever you go.
I actually like Outlier a good bit from what I’ve seen. I hope he listens to your reasoning above and you can both see past the miniature rued of I can call it that.
I’ll likely not be posting very much for a time of I can just help myself, it’s a distraction for me that gets me through difficult days and patches, but that’s all the more reason to hush myself unless I’m actually in a good place, like before all this crap world took over the show.
These are stressful times for everybody, not least the more conscious. I’ve recognised so much that is important in life, and so much that is not.
Chit chatting about drugs I know next to squat about, for fun and a healthy, engaging hobby just isn’t rewarding or purposeful for me like it was inspiring me to join here.
I’m literally all out done wasting my energy in the wrong crowd of the most unlike minds in various threads here on various political themes I just can’t keep my head out of, but think I just will, here at least, from now on.
@unodelocosa hope you are keeping alright generally man. I feel you too. Passion and drive gets us into many skirmishes.
I’m genuinely really pleased that we both exercised maturity and were adult enough to fully resolve our silly really, little getting to know each other lol, miss-mash of philosophy and real world factual drug talk intertwined whatever it was.
Water under a bridge in no time and zero hard feelings, I was pleased you never felt deterred by the stress and frustration from continuing to participate here and share your experience and wisdom.
I’ve always seen Outlier as a good guy too though. I saw elsewhere also he’s another among us really succumbing to very high stress levels and feelings of futility in life.
Emotions everywhere driving things.
Ouch. Case of piles atm from I.B.S. , really making it hard to think straight. Of all the things in life I would have thought a stinging butt wouldn’t dominate my consciousness so much night and day.
Best remedy for piles I know of, fresh urine. Really takes the sting away faster than aloe Vera or Shea Butter, also cheaper lol!
Except I’ve not organised a container and with the runs as I’m prone to, every “trip” scuffs the surface and I’m frequently out of wee. It’s time for a container I think.
Right, I’d better check see if there’s any alerts I don’t want to know about, I have a real case of amnesia, without alerts I’d never remember half the stuff I’ve posted each day. I cringe at times- eh? That thread? What on earth did I say last night lol…
I didn’t hesitate seeing your mention in contrast, before facing the potential music.
The internet can be dangerous you know. The way some matter or someone can really unexpectedly get in your head and twist it up at any time, in a way that doesn’t ever happen without a much greater level of predictability in real life.
My best mate’s mum is a real witch. Always has been. I’ve been exclusively polite, friendly, decent, natural and never afraid or oppressed.
She very nearly flipped me from a really positive good trip recently, having a right whail in hysterics on a Sunday joking about old times, kicking about my friend’s house and garden.
The way she so obnoxiously interrupted our space and how she was all round towards me, vs how I have always been with her and everyone, it was wicked really, and uncalled for.
True colours, bang on the table. It kind of shocked me, really admitting to myself how callous and uncaring this lady truly is.
From being one moment in my element, mentally free, happy, relaxed, I suddenly felt so unsafe in her house, like I needed to leave just to avoid having to have the vital basic conversation with her to not be bullied and belittled basically, as I’ll always defend myself or others, politely and with reason but fuck doing that on the peak of a really good trip.
It reminded how with acid, however headstrong you are, it can just take one little unexpected negative input or shock, I had to focus on steadying the trip and succeeded at reverting it back, but partly in my mind on the condition or assumption I could avoid seeing my friend’s mum again that day.
I did, left within an hour, happy as Larry to be out in the safe open public where I am my own Dominion and as free as anywhere.
A few days later, as I’m really trying to help this friend with a longterm alcohol problem, support, suggestions, real talk about all things, I’m convinced his mum’s sheer negativity must be a factor driving his lifelong use of alcohol, the consciousness dimmer.
If so, and it’s surely a part of the motivating forces, it needs to be acknowledged to be aware of stressors and manage that anxiety without going back to the can, as it is with his DOC.
I mentioned this to him on phone, not one bit slamming his mum, who has forever spoken down to and cursed me so belittlingly into the ground without a single rise nor even feeling of annoyance from me, with a sincere view to help my friend focus on the underlying layers underneath his addiction.
His mum overheard me on the phone. It really wasn’t a bad thing at all said, nor in a bad tone. It surely touched a nerve though. But was the excuse she evidently sought to lash out hard, so disproportionately. It’s partly jealousy. The whole family, everyone except her, I’ve always had a solid bond with and have been the best friend honestly my mate has had his whole life.
That was a very rare occasion I allowed external real life stress to unexpectedly shake my mental calm late evening, I do have a complex anxiety and panic disorder and can shift between extremes at times.
But the internet though, you’re so much more open to retaliation, disagreement, fueding even.
So that’s it, I’ll just keep my head out of Politics and especially this damn Corona 6 pack shit every right minded person is sick of.
I do need some acupuncture today though for gut distress. 10.22 am here. Usual monstrous allergies to manage before anything and man I could use some consciousness alteration.
(nerd alert)
) that always seems to be off limits in any discussion.
