OMG I got away with it..

[4evrLkn]

They say relapse happens a very long time before you drink/snort/smoke/shoot.
I went through something similar with opiates. I know you probably don't want to hear what has been posted but it means people care.

^^^^ that is an great quote. That is so true that I never thought of it that way. But it definitely makes sense!
OP relapsed way before he even got the speed/alcohol

 

[stivsmegg]

I'm not judging you, and I'm sure nobody else is either. However, if you read this post from an objective standpoint, it was almost certainly written by a person obsessed... and that is totally fine as long as you're not in denial about it.

I know you aren't going to like this, but IMO you aren't "sober" just because you have a prescription for a lame version of your DOC. Maybe you can do that without falling back on the real thing, but not if you're like me or most real addicts. I suspect you're just like me because someone not obsessed wouldn't rationalize the risk involved. Someone not obsessed would say "if there is even any possibility at all that making this decision could take me back to the depths of addiction and the inside of a cell, than I think I'll abstain."

Good luck anyway. If you can take speed like a normal man, my hat is off to you.

thanks for posting this, i have been thinking real hard about taking one of my girls 30 mg adderalls cuz she just got her script and i love stims but like you say; "if you can take speed like a normal man" well i cant and i know it but nearly talked myself into it after well over a year w/o all but pot and methadone(both are very therapeutic). so any way thanks to all who posted cuz you probably stopped me from heading down that road and ruining the great life i have now.

 

[djsim]

Dex/Ritalin was my gateway to speed/ice years back. I still have a dex RX but cannot take it therapeutically (ie RXd 20mg, take ~50-100mg daily tip the script is gone, abstain for 2 months, repeat). Some ppl have success using dex to come off meth like methadone is used for opiate addiction, but if you're sober, don't fool yourself a legal RX is any better than illegal equivalents when addicted. Try and tell me Desoxyn is not methamphetamine - meth is meth, a good eg of your logic.
My advice.... Don't drink alcohol or take any drugs lest you relapse. Benzos always have me relapse on codeine... Has happened three times out of three. My position as an MD makes it all the more problematic.
Fuck addiction. Do so by avoiding your triggers. Alcohol and stims shoud both be at the top f your lat.
Congrats on taking everyone's advice.... It takes a real man to own up to criticism. You've proven you're a worthy former addict. great work

 

[Mr.Scagnattie]

Only thing it sounds like you "got away" with, was fooling yourself into thinking you started anything besides down the road to addiction again.

Be careful man, thoughts like that can ruin people like us.

 

[LOGan1314]

I am very confused what you "got away" with. Are you referring to the absence of a crash or comedown? Or are you talking about how you didn't go on a crazy binge and start using every day again?

 

[i are spectre]

OP believes they are invincible

 

[hefe1313]

OP believes they are invincible

Great, thanks for that mind blowing information.

 

[smokemctoke420]

Now I wanna know what it's about.

 

[pasha]

Since the brains dopamine system/reward circuit is integral to alcoholism you can bet you haven't escaped anything.

Heroin is just a less toxic, more potent dopamine releaser. You've just traded one addiction for another. Question is which ones worst?



IMHO, alcoholism.

 

[i are spectre]

Great, thanks for that mind blowing information.

dude asked man, lighten up. obviously someone doesnt find it too mind blowing.

 

[tentram]

I would probably end up physically assaulting the person to get my fix. luckily I don't have a script for heroin lying around the house...

eh, my dad hands my scripts over when i ask for them; i'm responsible for the abuse in the end. he's just there trying to help by holding them when i ask. he knows not to resist.

OP - i haven't read most of the thread but do you think alcohol may be a catalyst in triggering your relapsing? a lot of people have this problem it seems. i know i went through a stage where if i'd had a couple drinks with a mate we would most always score some meth. we would drink while on it so it makes sense, yeah.

think about the triggers and how you can deal with and overcome them when they creep up on you.

 

[AlphaMethylPhenyl]

well alcohol is supposed to be the gateway drug...

 

[tentram]

certainly was the trigger in this instance.

 

[DooMMooD]

right well should i not be happy that I relapsed and my world didn't end... im just happy I got past it and im ok

Not at all, because this...

sounds to me like your relapse is just starting my friend

Sounds spot on. What do you mean your world didn't end? You drank 1 bottle of booze and after a YEAR of not using you call up your dope dealer within the hour. Sounds like a regrettable decision IMHO and a reason you should never drink again.

I'm also not gonna lie about this but in my most humble of opinions? Sounds to me that you got that "taste" in your mouth again and things are only just getting started. I hope for your sake I am wrong

 

[LOGan1314]

eh, my dad hands my scripts over when i ask for them; i'm responsible for the abuse in the end. he's just there trying to help by holding them when i ask. he knows not to resist.

OP - i haven't read most of the thread but do you think alcohol may be a catalyst in triggering your relapsing? a lot of people have this problem it seems. i know i went through a stage where if i'd had a couple drinks with a mate we would most always score some meth. we would drink while on it so it makes sense, yeah.

think about the triggers and how you can deal with and overcome them when they creep up on you.

When i drink i crave stims like a motherfucker.

 

[Obiez]

You have to see the connections between the poisons of choice here:

You probably started off by drinking, and you coupled it with amphetamines, and now when you drink you get the same desire and lowered inhibitions to get amphetamines. It's like a boring day and heroin for me. Once I have idle hands, my minds first thought is - lets just waste the day away. Or smoking and alcohol. I started smoking while drunk, and now I can't just have a drink without blazing through two packs of cigs, not to mention I won't stop drinking until I am done....in a few weeks.

I can smoke weed and not feel the urge to do anything. In fact when I get stoned I am so hyper aware that you won't get me to do anything harder then a bar of chocolate. The whole gateway drug, Jesus it's hogwash, but, you have to consider how your neuron synapses spark, if you used to drink and do stimulants every time you drink your mind will fire towards stimulants. So, in many peoples cases there is a gateway drug if you associate a substance with another substance, or a boring day with a substance. Boring days, that's my gateway drug.

Anyhow. Glad you enjoyed yourself, now look yourself in the mirror and repeat after me " I am justifying my craving because I can't get my shit together, living in a developed country is so fucking boring, I wish I lived in Africa where I would be starving most weeks but at least I would have something to do like catch buffalo or AIDS or something that would give me a jolt of reality, I had a psychotic break but that was a year ago, I am sure I am much smarter now, so yeah addarol, add medication, yeah I can do it, I am responsible now, I mean look at me I spent a whole year sober and pissed it all away a couple of sips in, but I can handle it." just be honest with yourself, that's all I am saying. Harsh? Nah, I just want the best for you. Really.

 

[Swimmingdancer]

Well after 1 year sober I drank again.. with in half the small bottle I had bought I was calling my dope dealer. (speed) anyways... I can't friken understand it... 1 year sober I drank a bit and I call him! OMG... well 2 days of no sleep and lots of getting shit done.. and I finally slept THANK YOU GOD. This morning I slept for a few hour and feel great now.. all in all dope rocks I got away with it had fun enjoyed my self got tons done... and lost a few pounds.. im happy

Might do it again but I won't drink ever again in my life... god drugs suck but I need them to funtion...

Whats chance ritilin would do the trick? I thinking it would work because dope makes me focus very insane like.. I feel awesome right now I not high or nothing just chilling catching up on everything...

So why? clean after 2 days no sleep I feel better coming off of dope then I do when im sober and healthy? I feel better now...
So I thinking stims might help me

only issue is after 10 years of abuse they do make me nuts pretty quick.. start hearing voices thinking people after me

Would ritilin have the same effect?

Just to clarify, by dope do you mean heroin? And if so, why wouldn't you sleep while on heroin?

 

[Serotonin101]

Just to clarify, by dope do you mean heroin? And if so, why wouldn't you sleep while on heroin?

its in parentheses (speed) which could be street amps (Europe) or meth (pretty much everywhere else in the world). I presume meth.

 

[XoxoMaryJane]

Let me walk you through having some sweet, sweet pills sitting around. At first you go to your doctor and you got to get your story straight to convince your doctor you really need this RX. Then the doctor is going to give you the forms to score yourself to tell whether or not you really are in need or not of the meds (that's how it works here) its not a 1 visit you get a RX process. If approved then you get your RX maybe by this time you have convinced yourself I am only going to take these as directed! I'm following the rules. I got this. Yeah that's what I said and many others before you. You get them filled get home and it begins. You now have a bottle full of Ritalin 30 day supply! Awesome you are back in control life is good for a while until that first time you slip, then you think quickly rationalizing to yourself it is okay it was just this one time. I can make up for that one and then your taking the next and next and next and BOOM you realize that you have only a few pills left but a whole lot of days to go before your next refill. Don't bother calling the nurse with my cat knocked my bottle over and my pills fell down the sink or I lost them I swear nothing short of a police report will get most doctors offices to give you a refill before the 30 days is up. Nor will the pharmacy fill it. I have heard it all. Doesn't much work. And then your faced with how to get by.Which by at that point if not already hasn't will more than likely open up the door for alcohol or other things.
OP please don't feel like getting by with it was a good thing! I'm happy that you didn't end up hurt in a bad way but in a way you did because I'm worried you are playing a game with yourself. A serious game of denial. That can lead to a really long life that you seemed to already have put behind you. My best advice is to get some help and not get on Ritalin. A lot of people have already written some really good posts I hope you really take time to read them I know ultimately the choice is yours to make. I worked for doctors for many, many years I was foolish enough to convince myself that if I took pills I wasn't on drugs. When in reality my doctor was just my dealer and at home it got to be well if I take I pill and I fell good I should take 2 then came 5. It was Percocet that started mine. Just so you are well aware before you do decide to start on Ritalin or any pills. Now keep in mind that I never IV'ed, snorted or did anything but take the pills I was prescribed and started a lifelong fight for me with other pills Xanax ,Restoril and Ritalin.We're soon enough to follow. I'm just as much of an addict as anyone that shoots heroin or alcoholic or the next person I really wish I could sit here and tell you that if there was a bottle sitting here and I could take my meds as prescribed but I'm not going to lie to you or me. I know this post went long and I apologize. Man just don't end up like me! Don't ever make the mistake in thinking if a substance is controlled, you will be in control of it. If your an addict at least I know from my perspective it always ends up controlling me in the end.

 

[Swimmingdancer]

its in parentheses (speed) which could be street amps (Europe) or meth (pretty much everywhere else in the world). I presume meth.

Thanks! I just got confused because a couple people in the thread mentioned heroin, and I've never really heard "dope" used to refer to amphetamines before.

For example:

Since the brains dopamine system/reward circuit is integral to alcoholism you can bet you haven't escaped anything.

Heroin is just a less toxic, more potent dopamine releaser. You've just traded one addiction for another. Question is which ones worst?

IMHO, alcoholism.

To the OP - Feel lucky you "got away with it" relatively unscathed this time and do not assume it means you can do so in the future. Also the more often you use drugs/alcohol, even if it doesn't result in instant addiction, the more likely you are to experience cravings and start using more frequently again. Many people once they have been addicted to something just need to stay away from it and anything that is is a trigger for them (often including similar drugs). Are you asking if Ritalin would be a good replacement for speed for you? Like using it sort of as a maintenance drug, or for (perhaps as of yet undiagnosed) mental issues such as ADHD that you may have been self-medicating with the speed for? That's a hard question and I think we need more info about what exactly you are asking.