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OMG I got away with it..

xxsicknessxx

xxsicknessxx

Bluelighter
Joined
Jun 26, 2008
Messages
1,014
Well after 1 year sober I drank again.. with in half the small bottle I had bought I was calling my dope dealer. (speed) anyways... I can't friken understand it... 1 year sober I drank a bit and I call him! OMG... well 2 days of no sleep and lots of getting shit done.. and I finally slept THANK YOU GOD. This morning I slept for a few hour and feel great now.. all in all dope rocks I got away with it had fun enjoyed my self got tons done... and lost a few pounds.. im happy

Might do it again but I won't drink ever again in my life... god drugs suck but I need them to funtion...

Whats chance ritilin would do the trick? I thinking it would work because dope makes me focus very insane like.. I feel awesome right now I not high or nothing just chilling catching up on everything...

So why? clean after 2 days no sleep I feel better coming off of dope then I do when im sober and healthy? I feel better now...
So I thinking stims might help me

only issue is after 10 years of abuse they do make me nuts pretty quick.. start hearing voices thinking people after me

Would ritilin have the same effect?
 
That all sounds good and I can relate to the feeling you're having. But what do you really think you "got away with"? It sounds like you are just getting started. Hello, obsession.

Go ahead and get a script for Ritalin. Let me know if you can take it as prescribed. Because if you can, I'm going to do the same thing with Vyvanse.
 
I am a drug addict and can't trust my self to take pills. My parents hold my pills for me. It sounds gay but hey Im doing what I got to be sober. I been sober one year I relapsed I made it another year I did 1 small dose of meth to get me going and it worked great..... guess I wait another year? *shrug* judge me if ya want but I know that a stim prescription would be very well used by me. Anyway why should I do meth if I can get something legal.... I mean its not fair I don't want to go to jail lol again
 
eh seems like a glorifying thread... I have a bad feeling about what's gonna happen here shortly :/
This is for you:
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xxsicknessxx said:
I am a drug addict and can't trust my self to take pills. My parents hold my pills for me. It sounds gay but hey Im doing what I got to be sober. I been sober one year I relapsed I made it another year I did 1 small dose of meth to get me going and it worked great..... guess I wait another year? *shrug* judge me if ya want but I know that a stim prescription would be very well used by me. Anyway why should I do meth if I can get something legal.... I mean its not fair I don't want to go to jail lol again
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I'm not judging you, and I'm sure nobody else is either. However, if you read this post from an objective standpoint, it was almost certainly written by a person obsessed... and that is totally fine as long as you're not in denial about it.

I know you aren't going to like this, but IMO you aren't "sober" just because you have a prescription for a lame version of your DOC. Maybe you can do that without falling back on the real thing, but not if you're like me or most real addicts. I suspect you're just like me because someone not obsessed wouldn't rationalize the risk involved. Someone not obsessed would say "if there is even any possibility at all that making this decision could take me back to the depths of addiction and the inside of a cell, than I think I'll abstain."

Good luck anyway. If you can take speed like a normal man, my hat is off to you.
 
right well should i not be happy that I relapsed and my world didn't end... im just happy I got past it and im ok
 
I'm happy to hear you don't feel like you messed up but please be careful okay? I really don't mean to be discouraging but this definitely sounds like you could be on the road to a major relapse and I'd hate to see that happen to you. I don't believe former drug addicts necessarily have to stay away from all drugs forever but you should at least stay clean from the drug you had a problem with for some time.
 
Slippery slope.

If you don't want to go through it again I'd put it behind you. Strongly suggest this - good luck to you.
 
They say relapse happens a very long time before you drink/snort/smoke/shoot.
I went through something similar with opiates. I know you probably don't want to hear what has been posted but it means people care.
 
I agree with the other posters.. this is a slippery slope and can lead to a relapse fairly quick. When I drink I immediately want my DOC, too. You mention that you have someone hold your prescriptions for you, which I think is a great idea. If you 110% stay faithful to someone holding your medication for you and truly need it because of medical conditions, then it may be worth properly acquiring from a doctor. Personally, if I had someone hold a prescription for my DOC, I would begin resenting that person and it would do more harm than good.

Please be very careful.
 
hthr007 said:
I agree with the other posters.. this is a slippery slope and can lead to a relapse fairly quick. When I drink I immediately want my DOC, too. You mention that you have someone hold your prescriptions for you, which I think is a great idea. If you 110% stay faithful to someone holding your medication for you and truly need it because of medical conditions, then it may be worth properly acquiring from a doctor. Personally, if I had someone hold a prescription for my DOC, I would begin resenting that person and it would do more harm than good.

Please be very careful.
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I would probably end up physically assaulting the person to get my fix. luckily I don't have a script for heroin lying around the house...
 
DrinksWithEvil said:
sounds to me like your relapse is just starting my friend
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I agree. To the OP you got away with sweet fuck all I am afraid. You busted plain & simple & if you think you got away with it then surely you will the next time too no?

I can only suggest that you put steps in place so you don't continue down the path of self destruction. Every time I have stepped in for another go & every time I tell myself "it will be different, I am in control" I hit rock bottom quicker than the last time & the time before etc.......
 
maybe u do legit need ritalin... talk to a dr about it... orrrr maybe you are looking for an excuse to get high... you are the only one that knows the answer tho
 
Sickness, how can you even be contemplating going onto a stimulant like Ritalin, even if intending low doses as a Doc would prescribe it when you've just come out of a complete psychotic break caused by previous stimulant abuse. Something in your make-up or your brain chemistry or the way you end up using them shows that stimulants take you to a very bad place.

How fully do you remember how you felt deep in the psychosis? I've had short term amphetamine psychosis after a bit of a run and I can't really remember what it was like. Do you recall how very fearful you were, what you thought people were doing to you, your utter confusion? Read back through your threads if not, as a record of your mental state it's all there.

You will not be able to keep your use under control. You've failed at it previously, why should you sudddenly be any better at it? You won't be. Sounds like your relapse, though you think you got away with it and the experience was great this time has you already obsessing about using again, and it will very quickly stop being great and will take you straight back to that dark place had you so afraid. Don't do that to yourself, please.
 
xxsicknessxx said:
I am a drug addict and can't trust my self to take pills. My parents hold my pills for me. It sounds gay but hey Im doing what I got to be sober. I been sober one year I relapsed I made it another year I did 1 small dose of meth to get me going and it worked great..... guess I wait another year? *shrug* judge me if ya want but I know that a stim prescription would be very well used by me. Anyway why should I do meth if I can get something legal.... I mean its not fair I don't want to go to jail lol again
Click to expand...

My wife has my bank card. I'm definitely not gay, and definitely a better person!
 
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