BigSlick
Greenlighter
- Joined
- May 11, 2010
- Messages
- 26
Was planning to detox from oxy again, started day 1, 24 hours in I decided I didn't have another detox left in me and ran to a sub doctor for the first time ever, the w/d wasn't even that bad I was just being a baby. I had detoxed a week prior for 10 days, relapsed for a week, then had 2 consecutive 24 hours clean so I'm not sure how bad the w/d would have even been anyways.
First day he gives me 4mg, I'm so fuking high I can barely keep my eyes open long enough to finish reading a text message. Full nod. He had handed me another 4mg to take home for if the first didn't stop the w/d then wrote me a script for 8mg a day for the weekend since he'd be out of office I could go do a supervised swallow at the pharmacy.
I realize 8mg would make me RETARDED high so instead I used the extra 4mg yesterday morning and didn't bother picking up my script. It got me nearly as high if not worse then the first day.
Now I am here about 36 hours since my last 4mg, I didn't pick up my 8mg dose today for fear of death. I have zero w/d and all day today I felt normal as fuk. Tanned, went to the dog park, visited a friend, all the shit I would never have done previously because I was high.
Now I loved the feeling of today, and dreaded the feeling of yesterday and being on a nod, even as a 140mg a day oxy user I always HATED getting high to the point of nodding and would just run a nice buzz.
I know half life is crazy long on subs so is that 4mg from yesterday morning still blocking my w/d? Honestly the w/d wasn't even that bad compared to past times, I was just not in a good spot mentally because my gf is leaving my ass right now and I can't afford to go on a pill binge I need to be focused mentally and financially. I also wasn't in a position to miss any more work.
Should I ask to drop my dose to 2mg and see if that works or just man it the fuk up and try to go clean for a bit?
Anybody want to give some insight to this? My brain doesn't seem to be able to process everything to make a good decision right now. Basically I want to feel normal and I have between now and monday morning to get there. Whether that means cutting my dose in half or praying the w/d is not bad enough to keep me from work I don't know. I would prefer NOT to be on subs 100% but right now I need to be level headed so if that's what it's going to take for a bit then so be it.
First day he gives me 4mg, I'm so fuking high I can barely keep my eyes open long enough to finish reading a text message. Full nod. He had handed me another 4mg to take home for if the first didn't stop the w/d then wrote me a script for 8mg a day for the weekend since he'd be out of office I could go do a supervised swallow at the pharmacy.
I realize 8mg would make me RETARDED high so instead I used the extra 4mg yesterday morning and didn't bother picking up my script. It got me nearly as high if not worse then the first day.
Now I am here about 36 hours since my last 4mg, I didn't pick up my 8mg dose today for fear of death. I have zero w/d and all day today I felt normal as fuk. Tanned, went to the dog park, visited a friend, all the shit I would never have done previously because I was high.
Now I loved the feeling of today, and dreaded the feeling of yesterday and being on a nod, even as a 140mg a day oxy user I always HATED getting high to the point of nodding and would just run a nice buzz.
I know half life is crazy long on subs so is that 4mg from yesterday morning still blocking my w/d? Honestly the w/d wasn't even that bad compared to past times, I was just not in a good spot mentally because my gf is leaving my ass right now and I can't afford to go on a pill binge I need to be focused mentally and financially. I also wasn't in a position to miss any more work.
Should I ask to drop my dose to 2mg and see if that works or just man it the fuk up and try to go clean for a bit?
Anybody want to give some insight to this? My brain doesn't seem to be able to process everything to make a good decision right now. Basically I want to feel normal and I have between now and monday morning to get there. Whether that means cutting my dose in half or praying the w/d is not bad enough to keep me from work I don't know. I would prefer NOT to be on subs 100% but right now I need to be level headed so if that's what it's going to take for a bit then so be it.