Thank you all. Only a day here so far and I already feel the love! Trainspotter, I may take you up on that seeing as I havent really gotten the hang of the site yet. I could use a helping hand!
I have been an off and on again opiate addict (oxycodone orally) since the age of 15 and has continued up to now at the age of 21. I successfully quit in the early summer of 2011 before I first moved from home and was clean for 3 months until the girl I moved in with had them in her hand every morning when I got up. A stupid kid with a new sense of freedom and still a newbie to the sober life I gave in easily.
Long story short the last 3 years of my life have been a complete shame for me. Ive tried everything from IVing 40mg methadone and 60mg OCs to snorting OCs, even dabbled in the meth a couple times just to try and keep them pesky w/ds away and keep that wonderful feeling from fading.
So far ive got my "demons" I like to call them, down to a 45mg orally a day habit. But still the w/d is unbearable... I have already gotten to the bottom of why I started and what I was trying to "numb" if you will, so that part is out of the way. Everything that caused me to start has all gotten way better and doesnt really exist anymore, with the exception of a really bad dog attack when I was a six year old little girl that left me forever scared and completely changed my facial appearance that I havent quite come to terms with yet. I have a therapist for that aspect, though. I believe if I could make it through acute w/d I could make it out.
Sorry for the long post, but I didnt really know where to start. Any ideas on where I could begin to post to start my fight? I also plan to stay after I get through to offer my advise and support to others as they have and will do for me. I like being able to make a difference and this is one way I know for sure I can!
Thanks again!
-AaS
