You don't miss what you've never had.....it's not worth it in the long term of things. I am currently in active addiction, I could tell you SO MANY THINGS but there's too much to possibly relay through just a responding message. I first began using when I was approximately 14 and my use was periodically with even years in between use at times. I will be 50 in January!! In 2012 I relapsed after having 7 yrs clean, but from 2012 to 2017 I've had almost 3 yrs of intervals being clean, one of which I was incarcerated.. I haven't been clean since my release in 2017. I use daily with the very rare occasion of going without more than a day or two. It has cost and caused me to live a life of pain, loss, bitterness, loneliness, poverty, and so much more. Most of all it cost me the respect and personal relationship of my 4 children and my family. I have been judged, misunderstood, wrong, right, selfish, and unselfish. Being right doesn't change the guilt and disappointment that I feel when I am with my family. I can never change my past, only my future and at this point in my life/age what is the point as so much damage has already been done! I know none of this probably answers the question but hopefully it will at least make you give it some great consideration. It is extremely addictive, it gives one a false sense of reality, it takes everything from a person and never gives back the value in return of what it has taken. Don't be fooled, yes, this too can happen to you, no matter if you think you just want to experiment or use recreationally......no one wants to grow up to live a life of misery even if there were some fun times getting there. The misery far outweighs the fun, and we get old and fun isn't so big a deal, we want comfort, and to be worry free, and healthy. So I strongly encourage you.....don't arouse the monster that's really a demon because you never know how big yours will be as we all have our own that inside of us. Leave it be if you know what's good for you......