My Sinful Thrill

[EnYAY]

hey guys. ive never written before and i was just messing around with this.

all comments are appreciated

My sinful thrill

my sinful thrill
packed into this pill
all shapes and colors
makes strangers like brothers
don’t tell our mothers
this is my sinful thrill

my sinful thrill
makes my pupils spill
into my eyes
my shades are the disguise
this is my sinful thrill

my sinful thrill
make the music sound ill
the water tastes sweet
dancing to the beat
this is my sinful thrill

my sinful thrill
moving lights are still
high as a kite
sextacy all night
this is my sinful thrill

 

[New]

It's a good start, has a nice stop and go rhythm that makes you read each verse. I can certainly relate with it.

 

[LoveMeorHateMe]

I think its alright, I am sure alot of people can relate to it, I know I can.

 

[EnYAY]

Awsome.

thanks for the comments guys