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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards

My piss is so much better than y'alls.

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nordkraft

Greenlighter
Joined
May 14, 2011
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55°43′N 12°34′E
So I go to my local, smiling, friendly 'done clinic the other day, after waiting months to get an appointment to see them. Yay for our shitty welfare system.

I say I want to get stabilised on methadone, so I don't use all my money on drugs. They say fine, but I need to show two positive piss tests to get in their programme. I think ''Piece of cake, I was so fuckered last night, I'll get an even higher dose if they see how much is in my system!''.

I came, I pissed, I conquered. %)

So I come back in a week and they tell me, ''sadly'' they cannot help me, as I was ''OUT TO CHEAT THEM; I WAS 100% CLEAN.''

Now, fellow bluelighters, I have been taking over 500mg tramadol (yeah yeah I know) 30-45mg ketobemidone, 15-30mg methadone, 200mg codeine, kpins, valium, and smack when it's available. I smoke about a gram pr two of hashish/pot every day. Even THAT was negative. WTF.

So I flipped my shit of course. I told him I had no idea what THEY were smoking, and that I insisted they do the test over, as it was my life they were ruining. So I pissed in a cup again and they had one of those sticks that turns different colours for different drugs. The dumbass counsellor was like ''OH, I guess you ARE a drug user!'' No shit, why do you think I came here?!

8)

...Buuut, they won't accept the stick test as absolute assurance! I was about to dump that nice, steamy cup of tainted urine on his shoes. So they've sent it back to the same laboratory to test it again. Now I get to wait another two weeks!

Anyway, the point with this whole rant was, have any of you ever experienced being clean when you so obviously aren't? On super short acting drugs I could maybe understand, but I've taken some of these drugs daily for a decade now, I want to hear why a clinical laboratory passed me. He insisted they didn't screw up the labels or put apple juice in it or some BS like that.

I couldn't even use the poppy seed bagel excuse!
 
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