Minneapolis = DOPE

Minneapolis is where my habit started and ended.

It is normal to associate almost EVERYTHING with dope?

I see bright orange - it's the color of a rig cap. I bus/bike past the spots...we copped there last summer. I listen to A Tribe Called Quest - we used to ATCQ on all our missions. This is just a TINY example of all my "triggers". Sadly, many of my encounters with triggers are NOT avoidable! I've copped ALL over Minneapolis...I mean ALL over...except Northside...surprisingly!

What can I do to form new memories? For example, I want to be able to listen to A Tribe Called Quest (especially Midnight Marauders!) without wanting a shot! I understand that it's going to be impossible to remove all my "dope memories", or whatever you may call it.

I'm looking for suggestions! Dope, for me, is like a magnet! I struggle to fight the strong attraction between dope and Hannah (that's me!). I feel like a paperclip and dope is the magnet. This is NOT easy, but I am 50 days clean :) staying on that Suboxone maintenance! I appreciate any and all suggestions! <3 Hannah

P.S.: I think this is the first time I have ever mentioned my REAL name..I hope this wasn't a mistake...
 
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rachamim
Suboxone isn't always going to work. It is only suitable for small habits or habits of short duration due to its metabolic ceiling which, despite off label prescribing, is only 16mgs. IF you are physically comfortable your issues are psychological and I can tell you it will take a couple of years but triggers dissolve. I last did heroin 5 years ago in Cambodia and while I dream of it occasionally-despite morphine maintenance (heroin is merely morphine at 3.3x strength and slightly better rush)- I haven't craved it in years.
 
XTCAKE
So, rachamim, did I read that correctly? You're currently on "morphine maintenance "? Maybe I read that wrong.

I am physically comfortable, yes. It's definitely an issue in my head. Time will make things better..I hope!
 
rachamim
Yep, at the moment because I am visiting the US I am on 220mgs methadone daily but at home in the Philippines I maintain on 680mgs Instant Release morphine tablets in 2 doses of 340mgs each morning and afternoon. There is no sanctioned maintenance you simply pay $8 per prescription to a compliant doctor for 3 grammes of morphine sulphate hypodermic tablets, Instant Release if you take orally. The 3 grammes costs me about $65 but I need to travel 6 hours each way usually to get the boxes, I buy 9 to 12 grammes at a time (3 to 4 prescriptions). I could use fentanyl (patch or IV), meperidine/Demerol IV or Oxycontin in Instant Release capsules or IV but they are all imported from Europe and therefore mad expencive so I stick to the cheapest. There ARE countries like Austria that sanction Morphine Maintenance but they use Extended Release capsules, nasty.
 
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