malakaix
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Apr 12, 2008
- Messages
- 3,054
Thats so profound and honest Malakaix. How do you think your insight into your 'martyring' is going to change your life?![]()
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Hopefully i'll learn greater acceptance.. 'Joy' is still something of a mystery to me, we lose ourselves or at least our ideals of ourselves in the midst of happiness/joy as we come into the moment.. and with that comes the realization that your no more important then anyone else, all the meaning you've attributed to your existence through your own personal suffering and struggles seemingly slips away.. this is still difficult for me to accept because you begin to see the meaninglessness of everything; it's absolutely liberating because no-thing has more meaning then anything else.. it's all one, including you.. and that can be rather disillusioning to the self that has defined itself through personal suffering.
The bizarre thing is, i realized all of this years ago with psychedelics.. but it's taken a long time of sobriety to really understand the details.