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Meth/Amphetamines: Serious Discussion Only - V.2: MERGED with amps quitting thread

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Just an update: I've been spending more time with drug_wench lately and she's doing really well. Apart from a recent slip-up on her birthday, she's gone 2 months without meth, which is an awesome achievement. I'm still using but I'm starting to cut down with the help of dexies (the drug and alcohol service refused to prescribe them to me, so I had to look elsewhere!). :)
 
swim bought some "pure" meth from my neighbor. everyone says that of course but after snorting a small line swim is starting to wonder. no big problems except swim's liver (right side of swim's torso) seems to hurt. swim did have a fair amount to drink so i'm kind of paranoid -- is the meth making me "aware" of swim's liver going to work or is the meth causing the pain? this is about 6 hours since dosing
 
^^^^ no need for that SWIM shit here

we all know its you *points* yes, you.

the meth is making you aware of the acute need to pee

your bladder is not about to burst

fear not
 
I've been fucking up bad lately..
I've always been reckless but lately I feel like I'm just pushing myself to see how far I can go. I don't really give a fuck, I'm wondering whether I'll fall apart mentally or physically first. My bet is on physically as I have chest pains all the time. After puffing the other day my heart and body felt so bad I lay in bed and prayed not to die, holding on to the bed head with both hands (touch wood). I passed out for a few hours which has lately been happening even when I smoke pure meth which should be keeping me awake. When I smoke, I get dysphoric rather than euphoric, but I can't stop my compulsion to smoke the pipe.

My psychologist short tracked an appointment with a specialist to check out my heart and in my mind it was something very important to me; I had kind of seen it as a turning point I guess. I finished all my shit, but on the drive in to see her, I got a call cancelling the appointment. It was just like the last straw for me and I just feel like I really don't matter, I don't care how fucked up I get. I don't know why I feel this way, I guess after 7 years I've really gotten sick of fighting a losing battle against this shit.
 
^ It makes me sad to read such a dark post coming from you.

You shouldn't feel like you don't matter because you do <3 and there are many out there who would be devastated to see you lose the fight, including me!

It really sucks your appointment got cancelled, but you got another one and I know it is a real cunt you had to wait but atleast you are in. :) It can still be the turning point you saw it as before, even if it comes just a little bit later. I know you get into a more optimistic headspace when you have had some time off, it is easy to be down in the dumps because you have been using a lot but things will change for the better, you will see. :D

If you ever need a chat, you know I am always there for you love. Just know that you do matter, your friendship means a lot to me and I know there are many out there who could say the same. Try keep your chin up and see how you go with your appointment, remember I am only a stone throw away if you need me. ;)
 
I've been off meth for about 2 weeks now, with the help of dexies and weed. I know that doesn't make me totally clean from amphetamines, but I think dexies are the lesser of two evils. I'm slowly re-gaining weight... I put on several kilograms last time I checked, which brings me up to 50kg's. Still horribly underweight for someone my height, but at least it's better than it was. I've been having real bad problems with my memory lately - remembering people's names, appointments, and stuff like that. Does anybody else get that? My liver and kidneys have also been giving me problems, which may be related to hep C which I've tested positive for. Also, me and DW might be appearing on a documentary about methamphetamine sometime in the not-too-distant future which should be interesting. :)
 
I'm so proud of you Sweet Pea. I definitely had issues with memory after coming off of meth. Couldn't remember anyones name, forgot small strings of numbers etc. It gets better. It was like with meth, you were so hyper concentrated on stuff that you never let your mind switch to something else, and so when you are in the normal world, and effectively multi-tasking, it is tough to get your head to move from thinking one thought to another. It took awhile, but it definitely got better. Cool that you might be in a documentary, might get some insight, or might provide some insight about how you are coping with alternative ways of getting off meth to the medical community. Congrats again, and congrats to DW for her two months.
 
tattooblake81 said:
its as simple as truly wanting to quit not because u "have to quit" but want to,i havent touched dope in 5 years i used to bang it daily also u HAVE to switch addictions but dont become obsessed with one thing spread it out,for me im now a professional tatto artist got a lot of toys and with my old lady,and my evil cat!
Click to expand...

Nobody WANTS to be a fucking Meth addict. If quitting Meth is as easy as simply "truly wanting to quit", then this thread wouldn't even exist.
 
Sweet P said:
I've been off meth for about 2 weeks now, with the help of dexies and weed. I know that doesn't make me totally clean from amphetamines, but I think dexies are the lesser of two evils. I'm slowly re-gaining weight... I put on several kilograms last time I checked, which brings me up to 50kg's. Still horribly underweight for someone my height, but at least it's better than it was. I've been having real bad problems with my memory lately - remembering people's names, appointments, and stuff like that. Does anybody else get that? My liver and kidneys have also been giving me problems, which may be related to hep C which I've tested positive for. Also, me and DW might be appearing on a documentary about methamphetamine sometime in the not-too-distant future which should be interesting. :)
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Im so glad that youve been able to lay off the meth and that you are doing better. Your pretty damn tough to be able to get off that stuff after being on it for so long so im proud of you <3

That would be really cool if you 2 did a documentary about meth! You could actually tell it like it is and show what it's really like. As opposed to the stupid anti-drug propaganda ads that anyone over 10 years old can see through and know it's bullshit 8)

Im really happy that your doing better over all. Sorry about your liver and kidneys giving you trouble though that sucks :(
 
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Wow sweat P !

I guess you did end up finding yourself some suitable medication after all! congrats!

Adderall and weed has helped me stay "sober' more or less for three years.

But do you really want to have your face all over TV for something as serious as this? You'd never be able to take it back if you regretted it. But if you do decide to do it, make sure your at least paid well!

good luck
 
Sweet P said:
I've been off meth for about 2 weeks now, with the help of dexies and weed. I know that doesn't make me totally clean from amphetamines, but I think dexies are the lesser of two evils. I'm slowly re-gaining weight... I put on several kilograms last time I checked, which brings me up to 50kg's. Still horribly underweight for someone my height, but at least it's better than it was. I've been having real bad problems with my memory lately - remembering people's names, appointments, and stuff like that. Does anybody else get that? My liver and kidneys have also been giving me problems, which may be related to hep C which I've tested positive for. Also, me and DW might be appearing on a documentary about methamphetamine sometime in the not-too-distant future which should be interesting. :)
Click to expand...

Sweet az!
 
motiv311 said:
Wow sweat P !

I guess you did end up finding yourself some suitable medication after all! congrats!

Adderall and weed has helped me stay "sober' more or less for three years.

But do you really want to have your face all over TV for something as serious as this? You'd never be able to take it back if you regretted it. But if you do decide to do it, make sure your at least paid well!

good luck
Click to expand...

Well unfortunately I'm having to share somebody else's dexamphetamine script - the drug & alcohol service are still refusing to prescribe them to me. But at least it's better than nothing. I don't think I'd mind appearing on the documentary. My whole family and all my friends know I'm an addict, I've got methamphetamine-related tattoos across my arms, and I still have that "tweaker" look, so I'm sure most people can already figure me out. I also don't really believe in having regrets. The documentary is designed to warn others about the dangers of meth and how it can ruin people's lives, so I'd be happy to share my story if it can help others. :)
 
^ Yup, 50kg's and I'm 5' 8". My lowest was 45kg's.

That's what 3 years of heavy meth use can do to you. :\
 
I ended up going to detox on March 16th then I went to a 28 day rehab center. I got out at the end of April and I now live in a sober living apartment complex. I go to alcoholics anonymous meetings and narcotics anonymous meetings. I had a problem with meth and any other drug I could get my hands on. So far the treatment has worked. Its taking a while to adjust to life sober but it is happening very slowly. I know that if I could do it anyone could do it because I really thought that I was hopeless. I wanted to die and I thought I was going to die from all the drugs. I wish you all the best!! I hope to see you all on the highway of recovery! Sometimes I do miss the drugs and the life style but I have to remember how miserable I was and that it just was not fun for me anymore!!
 
Meth/amphetamine MEGA Thread!

The last mega thread seems to have disappeared (or has been archived), so I thought I'd start a new one for those of us struggling with meth/amphetamine abuse and addiction, and needing advice or support from others in the same situation. :)

My story: I'd been using crystal meth heavily for about 3 years, and speed (powdered dexamphetamine, probably cut with meth and other drugs) for quite a few years before that. I finally quit my habit about 2 months ago. I'll admit that I'm not completely amphetamine free - I've had the odd slip-up with meth since then, and I'm using dexamphetamine tablets to help me function and deal with depression and PAWS. I don't plan on using it for much longer though. I'd like to be clean from all amphetamines by the end of the year, so I can finally give my body and mind a chance to recover properly. Meth has taken a huge toll on my physical and mental health. My weight dropped down to 45kg's (about 100lbs) and I'm 5'8", I've got a case of "meth mouth" with a few rotting teeth and badly receding gums, I was becoming psychotic and had to be involuntarily committed into a psychiatric hospital, and so on. I also got several drug-related criminal convictions earlier this year. Still, I often worry about how I'll cope without amphetamines, and how long it'll take for things to return to "normal" (if they ever do!) once I quit, but I guess it's just a matter of focusing on one day at a time. I'm currently in drug counselling, which I'm required to attend as part of my probation, and I've been finding that really helpful.

Anyways, I'd love to hear how others are doing! <3
 
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congrats

Congratulations. Good job staying off that shit. I've been clean from speed for a month after two years of abuse. It got to the point where I thought I could psychically communicate with an insect and would piss into bottles to examine my urine over time. Crazy shit. It was making me emaciated and insane. I feel a lot healthier now, and I'm able to sort out my life.
 
^ Thanks! Yeah I can totally relate to all the crazy shit that goes along with meth. Glad your health has improved and you're now in a better space.

And cool, I see the mods have found the old mega thread and merged mine with it. :)
 
sweet p - good to hear that you have been able to cut back...

im now 90 and a few days clean from p... i have purposely avoided people/places where its prevalent since moving to the usa but im still having pretty serious sleep issues (dreaming about drugs & waking up in a sweat n being unable to fall back asleep and if i do only to dream about smoking)

just had 2 teeth in my mouth pulled, dentist looked unimpressed. at least they are up the back aye?
 
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