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Meth/Amphetamines: Serious Discussion Only - V.2: MERGED with amps quitting thread

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^^^ AWW im sorry Sweet P :( . Youve had such a shit time lately i really hope things look up for you soon. With any luck theyl put you on dexedrine as id imagine that would help the cravings a good bit. Kinda like methadone for a junkie really. So i really hope they give it to you because theres nothing good that came out of meth yet. Plus the whole hasssle of scoring takes it's toal on you as well and the cost makes sure your always broke.

If you see me on MSN hit me up no matter what my status is. I might not be on much tonight though as im dead tired.
 
Guys
I'm SORRY I haven't posted here lately, It's a REALLY long story, on one occasion I became convinced that some date last December was my birthday when it is not in december at all.
I'm fighting hard here but fall down and down...
PA can I talk to you my friend???
Could you give me a call sometime man?
:(
 
I have relapsed last month on meth, have used too much dexedrine and oxycodone this month.
I'm going through w/d from BOTH of the latter right now.
The hallucinations almost make me feel at peace with myself, looking up suicide bridges on the internet brings me great fascination and curiosity.
I think I have LOST IT this time guys my mind will fade off now.
 
Sweet P said:
^ Thanks! I discharged myself from the hospital this morning (I hate that place, and their detox facility sucks) so I'm back at home now. Apparently I'll hear from the shrink on Monday, who'll tell me whether or not I qualify for dexies or ritalin to help with the meth cravings. Hopefully it'll be good news.
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I'm rooting for you, Sweet P. Hopefully they can set up a d-amp taper pretty soon.

I know what it's like when you feel like a drug is haunting you every step throughout your life. Good luck and take care! Have a few benzos on hand if need be!

It takes a strong person to keep up a drug habit and an even stronger one to quit. If you want to talk feel free to PM me.

gorgoroth said:
I have relapsed last month on meth, have used too much dexedrine and oxycodone this month.
I'm going through w/d from BOTH of the latter right now.
The hallucinations almost make me feel at peace with myself, looking up suicide bridges on the internet brings me great fascination and curiosity.
I think I have LOST IT this time guys my mind will fade off now.
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Take another break from the meth, man. Get some sleep, you'll feel better.

Sorry to hear you're experiencing hallucinations, I know that they're not fun.
 
Captain.Heroin said:
I'm rooting for you, Sweet P. Hopefully they can set up a d-amp taper pretty soon.

I know what it's like when you feel like a drug is haunting you every step throughout your life. Good luck and take care! Have a few benzos on hand if need be!

It takes a strong person to keep up a drug habit and an even stronger one to quit. If you want to talk feel free to PM me.
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Hey, thanks! Don't worry, I've usually got plenty of clonazepam and diazepam on hand - another addiction of mine! But frankly, I can live with a life-long benzo dependence if it means quitting meth for good.
 
^
When I was addicted to benzos it made me much more compulsive and reckless with my actions, I started drinking heavily, got into opiates more, all because I constantly had that nagging feeling in me that I needed more drugs to calm me. Because benzo tolerances just get rediculous after a while and when they stop working and you really have anxiety your just in a constant battle to not slip into a world of hell. Benzo addiction is fucking horrid, don't underestimate it Sweet P. Their effects may be subtle but physical dependance has a HUGE impact on you mentally. You should try and cut down your benzo usage, I bet it'd make a difference in helping you get off meth, but obviously I wouldn't do this all at once.

I take dexamphetamine daily for medical purposes (prescribed) and I'm already dependant on this stuff too, it's nowhere near the level of addiction a meth user would be going through so I think it's a great idea to switch to d-amp and taper. But if I don't take my dex-amp I'm very moody, irritable, tired, unable to do things and just generally feel shit.

To sum things up though, when I was addicted to benzos and I think I'm nearly becoming addicted again (meh), it changed my attitude and made me crave other drugs alot more then usual. I'm really careful with my diazepam these days.

But yeah, dexamphetamine would be a great replacement for meth and cure of the w/ds, I really hope you do get scripted it and things work out, I don't see a reason why they wouldn't. Best of luck, hope this post makes sense, I'm rather drunk.

I've become quite dependant on dexamphetamine (35mg daily, sometimes less, sometimes much much more), having access to plenty of them on the black market too doesn't help. I can't imagine how a smoking/IV meth habit would feel like, though I've used a fair bit of meth over the years, though I only ever snorted it. Much love <3 to everyone here battling with Meth/Amp dependance.
 
puckboy said:
^
When I was addicted to benzos it made me much more compulsive and reckless with my actions, I started drinking heavily, got into opiates more, all because I constantly had that nagging feeling in me that I needed more drugs to calm me. Because benzo tolerances just get rediculous after a while and when they stop working and you really have anxiety your just in a constant battle to not slip into a world of hell. Benzo addiction is fucking horrid, don't underestimate it Sweet P. Their effects may be subtle but physical dependance has a HUGE impact on you mentally. You should try and cut down your benzo usage, I bet it'd make a difference in helping you get off meth, but obviously I wouldn't do this all at once.
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Well, yeah, I'll probably eventually need to taper down the benzos. I've been on clonazepam daily for 6 years, and diazepam daily for a few months on top of that. But quitting meth is my priority at the moment. At least the benzos can be monitored by my doctor, I know they're the real deal, and in the short term they're less harmful to me.
 
Fucking hell. I just heard that I won't be able to see the shrink until February. I'm already struggling at the moment as it is... I doubt I'll be able to wait that long for the dexies before I start using again. :!
 
Thank you so much Wingnut...seriously.
Wish I'd seen something like that, when coming off my really bad ampheta-spirial, a year ago.
(please forgive me, if this is not considered "helpful", but I hope it could be...and I really care alot about this thread+trying to get people to re-think 'doing it just once', Mods remove if needed :/ )

Anyway, when my "spiral" happend(the first of 4 times lol), I was 16, very frightening, turning on my mother, who I was always close to, as close can be.
I'd throw dishes/pots and pans/etc, whatever, at her. hitting her a few times. Not cool.
Onto the main reason why I am posting: When I hit the bed, after a couple of yrs binge, I ran out..my doctor had cut me off...I laid there in bed 24-7, crying my eyes out, shivering and shaking at any little sound in the House, irrational talking out of my head(I guess from the combo of the high/high Fever I had + amp's leaking out of me?) and of course....the bitchyness. this went on a little over 2 weeks, just lying in bed, not showering, crying, crying, crying, battling thoughts in my head of what "They" had planned for me...thank god I had my mother. My blood pressure would be sky rocketing, and I'd eat anywhere between 10-15 10mg.Valium, didn't do a whole lot for my anxiety or blood pressure, and I had ZERO tolerance(Not saying it wasn't a miracle anyway, it's the only thing that got me to choke down stuff like Nutrition Bars, ramen noodles, and as other's have said Yogurt)
Last things I remember about that awful time is; just sweating insanely, talking out of my head, and being in a rage everyday....towards everyone, just really bad vibes folks!

But....it GOT BETTER! So, people keep your heads up please. Whether it be Crystal or drugstore Amphetamines....THEY'RE ALL FUCKING HORRIBLE. [it will get better for you guys struggling...heh....matter of fact I just relapsed 2 weeks ago, and have plenty of amp's coming in.....I was happy at first, but I know me and there is no "doing it just for fun" I take it to the maximum, and with all my mental problems going on, I'm afraid of what will happen tomy mind. )

sorry to be a downer....just trying to help. :( sorry you guys
 
AphexAcid93 said:
But....it GOT BETTER! So, people keep your heads up please. Whether it be Crystal or drugstore Amphetamines....THEY'RE ALL FUCKING HORRIBLE. [it will get better for you guys struggling...heh....
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I completely agree. Ime, I never ever thought I would just feel 'normal'.

But here I am, free from addiction. And I couldn't be happier.
 
im trying real hard to stop doing speed.
but i keep getting back into it. I relapsed today i went to school and all i did was blow speed all day then i went home and just did more untill 6 when i had to go to my drug program (wich i check myself into) and now my head is fucking pounding, im hungry as shit from not eatting. but no matter how sick and tired i get of the crash i still keep going back to it.

i really need some help and guidance from anyone who has been clean of any speed.
can some one please help?
everyone i just says you need to find somthing to do that you are into or get a job or somthing. but the thing is i try but im not really into anything like i used to be it really sucks cuz everyone makes it sound so easy.
and i tryed getting a job to keep my self busy but the only thing that happend was i just got high at work haha. its like theres nothing i can do

i really need all the advice i can get.
can some one please help me out???
 
^ I'm a struggling meth addict myself, so I know how you must feel. Keeping yourself busy is important, but like you say, it's hard when you don't have any real hobbies or interests. Meth was (and kinda still is) my whole life - I don't really have much else to do during the day, as I don't have a job and I don't go to school. Try going for walks, doing housework, and stuff like that. Just anything to keep your mind off the drugs. It's easier said than done, but I wish you all the best. Feel free to PM me if you need to. You won't be able to PM until you reach 50+ posts, though.
 
^ Just take each day as it comes. Try focusing on the present, rather than looking ahead. I've been clean for about 2 weeks now, which is the longest I've been clean in a very long time. It's still very difficult for me, but as each day passes, it gradually gets easier.
 
rollin dubbs said:
thanks i think thats going to help.
2 weeks..do you feel good about that? if i did that i would feel unstopable
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It feels good, but I'm not quite out of the woods yet... I think I'm over the worst of the withdrawals, but the cravings are still bugging me. I'm seeing a shrink in February who will hopefully prescribe me some dexies to help cope with the cravings. I've also got court coming up. Facing multiple charges thanks to my addiction! :\
 
aw damn
well good luck to you man im happy for you getting clean for 2 weeks.
just be stong through man good luck with court.
that shit could make anyone go nuts.

are you looking at any time do you think?
 
^ Thanks. It's my first offence so I doubt I'll serve time (thankfully, as men's prisons aren't exactly good places for transsexuals!), but I'll probably get a fine or supervision (probation). I'm actually not that worried about it.
 
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