Meditating

[Baker]

Freedom

Standing in peaceful silence
Contained within my own felicity
A chill runs down my spine
Sparked by a layer of perspiration on my back
My body unwinds as I fill with contentment
I know that this euphoria has been earned
An energy charges through my soul
Waiting in patience for the music’s call
Feeling it lulling me and filling me with warmth
Waiting I inhale a large mouthful of smoke filled air
Flavoured by the sweet chemicals from the smoke machine in the corner
I feel a drop of sweat collect on the tip of my nose
Ready to drop like rain, I created it, like I’m a god

My body begins to wind
As I follow the bass lines
The music moves my soul
Starts to control my spine
This is my time
The way I unwind

I feel the rush
And I feel the release
Following the build up, the peak, what a feast
My arms and legs move faster
Following the flow
Only those who have felt this way
Are the ones who should know

The faces watching are my children now
Ready to learn
Inspired by freedom, and seeking bliss
Learning a state of meditation
Dissolving the ego to exist in the moment

Fire lights my face in the darkness
Warming the moisture that extrudes from my pores
Induced by the twirling of this stick with two fiery ends
Like yin and yang the middle of the stick conveys control
While the naked flames of chaos dance like liquid faces in the night
I am in a state of bliss, this mind state is earned
This euphoria is instinctual yet is something learned
I feel guided by my primal instincts
If I were running through the bush
I would be agile like Tarzan
Because my perception of time moves so slowly
My perception of time doesn’t exist at all

I open my eyes
I haven’t moved at all
I am sitting in my room alone
Staring at nothing but the wall
I didn’t learn of this place on my own
But when I want to visit it again, I do it alone

 

[(Wordy)]

Wow, there are some amazing visual flashes in there, and I can definitely relate to the energies you've captured.

Fire lights my face in the darkness
Warming the moisture that extrudes from my pores
Induced by the twirling of this stick with two fiery ends
Like yin and yang the middle of the stick conveys control
While the naked flames of chaos dance like liquid faces in the night

There's an elevated, serious tone to this, partly down to the word choice I think (e.g. 'extrudes', 'induced'), but there's a careful fluidity to it. The effect you've achieved through unravelling the imagery is very powerful.

 

[Baker]

yeah, I really enjoyed writing this piece, perhaps the first poem I was actually satisfied with, once finished.
Instead of my usual dislike, maybe i'm just developing my writing style more