MDPV Megathread 5: Waiting for Jesus to show up

[SmokeaJoint]

I swear that aside from how often you tend to hit, vaped peevee is literally crack -- probably "worse". I'll never recommend or introduce anyone to it again.

Anyone think they can control their vaping?

Probably everyone thinks they can, that a drug can't tell them what to do and they have free will to use it as they like, when they like, and how often.

What ends up happening is something no one ever expects:

It's there where you used to be, and you're gone.

Okay dude dig this shit. I put a little PV in a brass screen atop some ash when I still had some, smoked it etc and when I looked in the bowl it had burned a hole in the fucking screen! That was a new screen too! I hate to think about whats happening to your lungs, or my nose for that matter lol.

In 30 years we're all gonna have cancer lol.

 

[Dedbeet]

Okay dude dig this shit. I put a little PV in a brass screen atop some ash when I still had some, smoked it etc and when I looked in the bowl it had burned a hole in the fucking screen! That was a new screen too! I hate to think about whats happening to your lungs, or my nose for that matter lol.

Doesn't seem too hard on the lungs or nose. I've never got a heavy feeling chest or shortness of breath, have never once coughed while smoking it, the smoke is not harsh... even tobacco seems to be harsher on the lungs.

If it never makes you cough, that's a pretty good sign...

 

[SmokeaJoint]

But you don't deny the cancer right? Lol.

 

[Dedbeet]

Uggh... nasty sensory anhedonia that struck recently. Cigarettes taste like glue. A sandwich tastes like paper. A sugary/flavored kid's cereal would taste like roadside pebbles. A pizza with everything on it would taste like dirty cowshit. This sux.... it is empty. Brain chemistry definitely well out of whack, but certainly wasn't a surprise. The peevee is calling, and for the moment I'm not answering, as "what's next?" doesn't look so attractive at the moment.

 

[FlippingTop]

smoke it and man up tbh!

Just hit 50mg and enjoy your pizza dammit. Think of those less fortunate than yourself

How many days is it now?

 

[FlippingTop]

uhhhh oohhhhh, someone's still onliiiiiinnnnnnnnee!

Time to 2nd class send it to yourself maybe

 

[stimutant]

uuuuuuhhhhhhhhhh i waaaaaantttt damn melbourne is toooo far from home at this moment.....k beer has to do the trick now.

 

[DS_]

uhhhh oohhhhh, someone's still onliiiiiinnnnnnnnee!

Time to 2nd class send it to yourself maybe

Haha. Genius.

 

[Dedbeet]

smoke it and man up tbh!

Just hit 50mg and enjoy your pizza dammit. Think of those less fortunate than yourself

How many days is it now?

"Smoke it and man up", LOL... too late on that one, already did. A smart peevee-idiot always figures things out for themselves .

Re: How many days... since last Thursday at around 2PM pacific, with a couple very short sleeps... too zonked to figure it out, will let ya do that. The quantity has not been that great, as I started with a gram and probably have at least half of it left, maybe 600-650mg. Sleep deprivation sucks, tho.

Fwiw, I kind of like the idea of not having the option of peevee use, and I hope they ban it. The high is not worth the hassles.

 

[Dedbeet]

uhhhh oohhhhh, someone's still onliiiiiinnnnnnnnee!

Time to 2nd class send it to yourself maybe

Yes, I heard this option suggested somewhere, way back when.

Back in the dark ages, when dinosaurs ruled the earth, it seems.

For whatever reason, just don't wanna do that at the moment... dunno why. Not much of a delightful high at this point, as you might guess. The only reason I can come up with, is that I like going in the bathroom and looking at the bag. That's it. I like the way the peevee looks in the bag. I like to watch. I'm a peevee voyeur.

 

[FlippingTop]

What situation are you in that you can get away with drug use and not get caught?

Just out of interest

For hard reductions sake maybe you should give yourself a little pile, and remove the rest somehow so you actually stop? If you do stop, get some sleep, the sooner you will be able to start again with excellent results

Btw, try and get a smoothie and some multi vits down you before you stop!

I don't know how hard smoking it is on you, I know when I was snorting it and not sleeping for 5+ days and mixing with vallies I was a FUCKING Mess!

 

[Dedbeet]

What situation are you in that you can get away with drug use and not get caught?

Just out of interest

Say what... not get caught? Peevee is legal, afaik... maybe I misunderstood.

Do you mean, use for long periods without responsibilities? Well, I'm out of work & on the public dole, don't have too many friends (solitary-type person who enjoys their own company) and a lot of free time, which I like & greatly prefer to having a lot of money.

For hard reductions sake maybe you should give yourself a little pile, and remove the rest somehow so you actually stop? If you do stop, get some sleep, the sooner you will be able to start again with excellent results

It's already not much fun, as the sleep deprivation kind of kills it at some point and the high is heavily laced with the body's inability to supply what the drug demands.

I figure I'll get a decent sleep soon... the only 'trouble' so far has been not sleeping too long and waking up in withdrawals, e.g. agitation & restlessness, the usual, & it's too easy to pick the bag back u. Peevee-withdrawal agitation really sucks, you probably know the feeling. Sweating from it while you're asleep, etc.

 

[Evad]

what you refer to is not withdrawal, it is the comedown

 

[Dedbeet]

what you refer to is not withdrawal, it is the comedown

Could just go with a biological term -- "dopamine-depleted brain". In which case it could easily extend beyond the period one could reasonably refer to as a comedown.

Fwiw, I've had a lot better luck looking at peevee and other such drugs in terms of biology than in "normal drug terms", or in moral terms (screw that last). IMO they are substances that affect fundamental neurotransmitters, and their effects are felt "directly" and then translated in terms of the memory-based psyche to "I had fun" or whatever.

The interesting point with dopaminergics is that a poor-quality experience often still gets translated down the line into "I had fun", which to me really hints at the "fundamental/biological" nature of these drugs, and the interesting fact that it can suck for the user and kick ass for parts of their brain circuitry .

 

[dee_dee]

The interesting point with dopaminergics is that a poor-quality experience often still gets translated down the line into "I had fun", which to me really hints at the "fundamental/biological" nature of these drugs, and the interesting fact that it can suck for the user and kick ass for parts of their brain circuitry .[/QUOTE]

i cant comment on this particular substance as i have no experience with it, but i agree, in terms of both cocaine and mephedrone, for me personally, there is a defining line where there is no longer any pleasure whatsoever.

line 3 or 4 of cocaine for me is fine, beyond that stage can definitley be fun and exciting but the kick becomes more out of chasing the high rather than anything else. those are the times for me when when it just all gets lost somewhere and in the end i actually am very much aware that i am not even having a good time but i want to do more, then its goodbye from me.

it is still definitley very easy to kid yourself you are loving it though, even when you no deep down inside you are not

 

[Dedbeet]

i cant comment on this particular substance as i have no experience with it, but i agree, in terms of both cocaine and mephedrone, for me personally, there is a defining line where there is no longer any pleasure whatsoever.

Well, what I'm noting here is the interesting phenomenon with coke, MDPV and other "dopamine focused" drugs where the enjoyment (of any sort, including euphoria) is often significantly, even largely, outweighed by problems.

And then once the user has run out, come down, etc. suddenly "Wow, that was a *blast*, and I remember no significant problems -- would love to do that again".

Far from suggesting any moral issues in this, it seems here to be purely biological. I've had a number of peevee highs myself that were mostly unpleasant tweakiness and very little euphoria, and yet my brain likes the stuff even when "its user" doesn't.

line 3 or 4 of cocaine for me is fine, beyond that stage can definitley be fun and exciting but the kick becomes more out of chasing the high rather than anything else. those are the times for me when when it just all gets lost somewhere and in the end i actually am very much aware that i am not even having a good time but i want to do more, then its goodbye from me.

it is still definitley very easy to kid yourself you are loving it though, even when you no deep down inside you are not

It isn't even kidding oneself, IMO -- this involves neurotransmitters, not a memory-based person thinking in terms of words and images. The high is kind of in a different dimension than the person who remembers it later (IME anyway).

In other words (this may sounds strange) -- the user isn't involved at all, their brain circuits are. And so it's not about kidding oneself or not. The memory-based self isn't even involved in the matter. That's why people 'lose control' with dopamine-based drugs, and why they usually keep coming back, despite the fact. And why (IMO) if one isn't willing to accept "loss of control" as the rule, rather the exception, it's probably a good idea not to use these drugs.

 

[dee_dee]

yep, your memories are shit with cocaine.

especially if your drinking as well.

ive had one gram as a special treat on new years day shared with friends just to be sociable, its the only time ive dabbled since last june.

before that i was bordering on getting to stage where i was hating the stuff, and i was only taking it once a month.

seductive in quite a sinister way for some people would be the understatment of the century.

when u actually hate the drug and it leaves u feeling empty, and caught in some stupid loop and you dont even feel good, youve not slept all weekend and you still want to take more and your scared of going to the cash machine to check your balance then you no its time to not take it anymore.

now ill take it at xmas/birthdays, thats it, and i never take more than half a gram, ever

 

[Dedbeet]

yep, your memories are shit with cocaine.

especially if your drinking as well.

One remembers what their dopamine circuitry wants them to remember, you could say, at least at the time they're thinking of getting more. For me too, of course. Looking at this stuff in terms of biology neatly erases all the moral bullshit.

ive had one gram as a special treat on new years day shared with friends just to be sociable, its the only time ive dabbled since last june.

before that i was bordering on getting to stage where i was hating the stuff, and i was only taking it once a month.

seductive in quite a sinister way for some people would be the understatment of the century.

Seems here that the "biology perspective" has the potential to bypass interpretations like "this shit is evil" as well, and feelings of guilt, etc.

Has nothing to do with any of that stuff -- that's how the "self based on memory" interprets perfectly normal behavior of their brain, translated in society's terms, which is also the self's terms.

If these drugs make people feel subhuman, maybe it's because neurotransmitters *are* subhuman, and they are what's being serviced. These substances are not in service to "everyday life", they're in service to brain chemistry. Yet that does not mean anything is wrong with that. Just an alternative way of looking at it.

when u actually hate the drug and it leaves u feeling empty, and caught in some stupid loop and you dont even feel good, youve not slept all weekend and you still want to take more and your scared of going to the cash machine to check your balance then you no its time to not take it anymore.

Fwiw, my attitude is "don't feel bad -- either use it and fully accept all the associated shit, or stop altogether". Tickling brain circuitry does not compute in terms of one's normal, everyday life, which is why it feels evil, you hate yourself, etc. I say the self isn't even involved, it's a brain chemistry thing, and seeing it this way clarifies a lot of issues.

 

[dee_dee]

yeah im kool with it all now anyway. i was only out this weekend and plenty of friends offering it to me and taking it in my company.

couldnt give a shit tbh, last spring/summer would of been a different story.

i defo would of had the arse ache

if thats whats it like treating yourself and indulging ocne a month, then seriously christ knows whats its like for someone that has the money to be doing it everyday or something, i seriously wouldnt even want to begin to imagine.

my once a month treat definitley ended up turning into two and three day benders with that stuff and with one or two of my mates as well.

i have no guilt about taking it like i did on new years at all, it was given to me a a present and i was up for joining in the fun

i do feel a little bad about the money i have spent in the past though, and staying awake for long periods, just wanting to stay out, not eat. etc etc.

its the kind of thing you could maybe dismiss at 20, not sure when your nearly hitting 40, lol

im fine with the experiences ive had now, its good to remember though, to ensure you dont see yourself slipping down that path again. once youve done it, its very easy to notice it happening again, thats why i say for me personally, line 3 or 4 is my defining line, the high starts changing to something completley different after that.

anyway, sorry mods, back on topic.

MDPV, sounds intersting but i definitley think its not the substance for me, lol

 

[Dedbeet]

i do feel a little bad about the money i have spent in the past though, and staying awake for long periods, just wanting to stay out, not eat. etc etc.

Wellll... the past went bye-bye. No more here ;-). Can't go back to retrieve the money, so it hardly matters, IMO. Coulda-woulda-shoulda.

its the kind of thing you could maybe dismiss at 20, not sure when your nearly hitting 40, lol

Dunno, I'm 46, fwiw. 'Stimulant partying' really is for the young/durable and it all feels much shittier physically as one gets into their 40's. I used to be able to do 6-day MDPV parties without a second thought, and now that amount of time straight awake is a serious killer.

im fine with the experiences ive had now, its good to remember though, to ensure you dont see yourself slipping down that path again. once youve done it, its very easy to notice it happening again, thats why i say for me personally, line 3 or 4 is my defining line, the high starts changing to something completley different after that

Eh... once a party is seriously underway, it sort of has its own flow to it.

It helps to end the "I'm in full control" pretense with these drugs, because one is not. That also eliminates a lot of guilty feelings, i.e. "dammit, why did I choose to do that?" One did not. Thus, IMO, accept "being out of control" as normal with these drugs or don't use 'em at all... seems silly to mix psychological issues like control with brain chemistry matters like drugs.