SilentRoller
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 9, 2012
- Messages
- 972
Substance: MDMA
Dosage: 220mg ('Green Android' pill)
Break taken before experience:3 Months
Pre-load: 500mg Carnitine, 200mg ALA, 2x 'Tums'
11pm: I swallow the pill as I enter the club. Feeling very excited as having taken a 3 month break from ALL drugs, I'm expecting an incredible experience! I grab a glass of water from the bar, before me and my mate decide to take a seat on one of the leather sofas at the side of the club for a few minutes. I'm already feeling the sensation of butterflies in my stomach, as I know I'm in for an extraordinary night!
11:10pm: A group of rather drunk lads from Birmingham decide to take a seat on the sofa opposite us and begin introducing themselves to us in a rather pissed, but friendly manner. At this point, I can feel a 'disturbance in the force' and am becoming rather twitchy and antsy in my seat as I can feel something starting to creep up on me. By now, I am wearing sunglasses in the club (something I thought was a good idea at the time), and one of the drunken lads suddenly asks "Heey mate, you on gear or something? Why have you got your shades on?!?". I responded quickly with some BS answer along the lines of "I have sensitive eyes, so I have to wear them due to the lights in the club!". He looked at me suspiciously, and nodded as a small grin formed across his face, and I decided at this point, I should make a quick retreat to the bathroom to freshen up.
11:20pm: Whilst in the bathroom, I felt a feeling that I had lost forever....'E nausea' (only ever got this on my first time). I knew what was coming was going to be huge, so I staggered out of the bathroom to find my mate who was still sitting on the sofa. As I exited the bathoom, one the drunken lads looked over and motioned a 'thumbs-up gesture. I decided to play it cool, as I floated back to the leather sofa. The conversation then turned to questions asking me what I did for a living etc, but by now, I was starting to rush really hard and couldn't handle any conversation, so I just got up and decided to walk to the dancefloor....
11:30-11:45pm: By the time I had reached the dancefloor, the come-up was so intense, that all I could do was stand there with my mouth open, drowning in rushes. I could hardly feel my legs at this point, and I felt my eyes start to roll rather intensely, to the point where it felt as if I was blacking out/leaving the room. One second, I would be at one end of the club, and then when I next open my eyes, I would be somewhere else, and have no idea how I got there. At this point, something rather strange happened (I'm not sure if its to do with the AL-CAR/carnitine pre-load I did), but it felt as if the come-up kind of stopped, and I was almost at the point of something massive. Now, after further investigation, I was told by many that I was absolutely ruined, and that my eyes were all over the place etc, however I experienced no eye-wiggles myself. I started to worry that this is me losing the magic etc. In reality though, I was rolling insanely hard with insane euphoria, although I did notice the empathy aspect was reduced compared to my previous rolls
11:45-12:45 It felt at this point as if I was still coming up, although how accurate this statement is I cannot be sure. Considering in this time, I can't remember much, due to the intense blackouts and eye rolling, I'll assume I was rolling extremely hard. I think the point I'm trying to make here is that I didn't FEEL as fucked as I obviously was. As I had been sensible and only bought out one pill re-dosing was not an option, although I'm glad this was the case, as I obviously didn't need anymore. I could of gone home to re-dose (as I only live about 2 minutes from the club), but I decided against it in true HR style. I was going to see this one through on a single dose.
1am: Absolutely off my face, to the point where people are starting to ask me if I have any spare gear, and statements such as "his eyes are all over the place" are starting to be heard. I'm overcome with a sense of euphoria at this point, a sense of joy that I've not only managed to keep my dosage sensible, but also at life in general. It was incredible. I will note though that I had very little energy to dance, and my pupils weren't as dilated as they normally are (again, this could be speculation on my part as I was fucked. I'm convinced it was the AL-CAR though). Despite this, I was still rolling absolute face, confirmed by my reaction to taking a hit on the Vicks inhaler....Jesus Christ! (if you haven't done this, do it!)
2am: Still absolutely spangled, possibly even more so than an hour ago! This banishes my theory that you need to re-dose to be up for 6 hours...there is never any need to take more that 1 again, ever. Still no energy to dance, so I'm just walking around the dance-floor with my jaw swinging, and my hands in the air gasping from the rushes. I then came to perhaps one of the best realizations I have ever had. I realized that MDMA is not about taking heroic doses, getting as fucked up as you can, or any of those things. Its a wonderful tool, which at the moment, allowed me to let go of many things in my life and appreciate myself. I felt a sense of sadness at the irresponsible nature in which I had used MDMA previously, but at the same time, a sense of joy that I have not only kept my dosage responsible, but that I had finally experienced what MDMA REALLY is, and that less really is more!
3am: Still absolutely flying! Some rather attractive women came up and tried to strike up a conversation (I found out later, she was trying to hit on me), but I was rolling so hard, I had no attention span, so I cut of mid-conversation and started dancing about! I eventually found a female friend who was also rolling face on the dancefloor, and we embraced as a cone of silence came down around us and the world around just blurred. All I could see was beauty, possibly one of the most incredible and unforgettable experiences ever.
4am: I can feel the effects starting to fade around this point, but it was here I noticed a major difference - Where as before I would begin to feel sad and empty about the experience coming to an end, I was still in a great mood and felt full of love for everyone! The club closed at this point, so me and my mate decided to walk home and share a joint on the journey back. We talked about how incredible the night had been, and that we need to do it again enxt year!
5am: Still in a great mood, although I'm starting to feel rather fatigued now. At this point, I'm having a bit of trouble urinating, although this solves itself in half an hour. To my surprise, I start to feel hungry, and I manage a banana and some orange juice before bed. I go to bed smiling to myself, and manage to sleep a solid 6 hours without any issue!
The Following days: I wake up the next morning feeling refreshed and in a great mood (although I feel a bit drained and dehydrated), I manage a full fried breakfast with another glass of orange juice. The afterglow has also been great, with a positive happy mood throughout. I'm on day 3 since the experience, and whilst I can feel a very slight dip in my mood today (day 3 is usually around the time it happens), I still feel relatively up-beat and great! Worthy of note too, is the fact that since the experience, I only suffered one very-small brain-zap on the 2nd night of sleep, but I haven't had any since
On a not so great note, I do now have a terrible sinus cold, probably due to sweating, dancing and sharing a vicks inhaler, so I can't really complain! However, the end consensus to this report is, less is more! Seriously, there is no need for all this 300mg + bollocks. Also, in my opinion, there is also not much need for re-dosing, as a 220mg single dose kept me flying for a good 4-5 hours!
A couple of questions though. what is everyone's view on Carnitine before the MDMA experience? I feel that perhaps it blunted the empathy slightly, together with the amount of eye-wiggles etc. The only reason I ask is because someone posted an article on here about carnitine being effective at blocking alot of MDMA's neurotoxicity, although I'm not sure how true this is. When I next use MDMA (in 3+ months time, I have realized that a 1 month break is FAR to soon!), I will try it without the carnitine. Its interesting how different rolls can place emphasis upon euphoria or empathy, but I have no complaints about my experience at the end of the day!
Cheers for reading
SR :D
Dosage: 220mg ('Green Android' pill)
Break taken before experience:3 Months
Pre-load: 500mg Carnitine, 200mg ALA, 2x 'Tums'
11pm: I swallow the pill as I enter the club. Feeling very excited as having taken a 3 month break from ALL drugs, I'm expecting an incredible experience! I grab a glass of water from the bar, before me and my mate decide to take a seat on one of the leather sofas at the side of the club for a few minutes. I'm already feeling the sensation of butterflies in my stomach, as I know I'm in for an extraordinary night!
11:10pm: A group of rather drunk lads from Birmingham decide to take a seat on the sofa opposite us and begin introducing themselves to us in a rather pissed, but friendly manner. At this point, I can feel a 'disturbance in the force' and am becoming rather twitchy and antsy in my seat as I can feel something starting to creep up on me. By now, I am wearing sunglasses in the club (something I thought was a good idea at the time), and one of the drunken lads suddenly asks "Heey mate, you on gear or something? Why have you got your shades on?!?". I responded quickly with some BS answer along the lines of "I have sensitive eyes, so I have to wear them due to the lights in the club!". He looked at me suspiciously, and nodded as a small grin formed across his face, and I decided at this point, I should make a quick retreat to the bathroom to freshen up.
11:20pm: Whilst in the bathroom, I felt a feeling that I had lost forever....'E nausea' (only ever got this on my first time). I knew what was coming was going to be huge, so I staggered out of the bathroom to find my mate who was still sitting on the sofa. As I exited the bathoom, one the drunken lads looked over and motioned a 'thumbs-up gesture. I decided to play it cool, as I floated back to the leather sofa. The conversation then turned to questions asking me what I did for a living etc, but by now, I was starting to rush really hard and couldn't handle any conversation, so I just got up and decided to walk to the dancefloor....
11:30-11:45pm: By the time I had reached the dancefloor, the come-up was so intense, that all I could do was stand there with my mouth open, drowning in rushes. I could hardly feel my legs at this point, and I felt my eyes start to roll rather intensely, to the point where it felt as if I was blacking out/leaving the room. One second, I would be at one end of the club, and then when I next open my eyes, I would be somewhere else, and have no idea how I got there. At this point, something rather strange happened (I'm not sure if its to do with the AL-CAR/carnitine pre-load I did), but it felt as if the come-up kind of stopped, and I was almost at the point of something massive. Now, after further investigation, I was told by many that I was absolutely ruined, and that my eyes were all over the place etc, however I experienced no eye-wiggles myself. I started to worry that this is me losing the magic etc. In reality though, I was rolling insanely hard with insane euphoria, although I did notice the empathy aspect was reduced compared to my previous rolls
11:45-12:45 It felt at this point as if I was still coming up, although how accurate this statement is I cannot be sure. Considering in this time, I can't remember much, due to the intense blackouts and eye rolling, I'll assume I was rolling extremely hard. I think the point I'm trying to make here is that I didn't FEEL as fucked as I obviously was. As I had been sensible and only bought out one pill re-dosing was not an option, although I'm glad this was the case, as I obviously didn't need anymore. I could of gone home to re-dose (as I only live about 2 minutes from the club), but I decided against it in true HR style. I was going to see this one through on a single dose.
1am: Absolutely off my face, to the point where people are starting to ask me if I have any spare gear, and statements such as "his eyes are all over the place" are starting to be heard. I'm overcome with a sense of euphoria at this point, a sense of joy that I've not only managed to keep my dosage sensible, but also at life in general. It was incredible. I will note though that I had very little energy to dance, and my pupils weren't as dilated as they normally are (again, this could be speculation on my part as I was fucked. I'm convinced it was the AL-CAR though). Despite this, I was still rolling absolute face, confirmed by my reaction to taking a hit on the Vicks inhaler....Jesus Christ! (if you haven't done this, do it!)
2am: Still absolutely spangled, possibly even more so than an hour ago! This banishes my theory that you need to re-dose to be up for 6 hours...there is never any need to take more that 1 again, ever. Still no energy to dance, so I'm just walking around the dance-floor with my jaw swinging, and my hands in the air gasping from the rushes. I then came to perhaps one of the best realizations I have ever had. I realized that MDMA is not about taking heroic doses, getting as fucked up as you can, or any of those things. Its a wonderful tool, which at the moment, allowed me to let go of many things in my life and appreciate myself. I felt a sense of sadness at the irresponsible nature in which I had used MDMA previously, but at the same time, a sense of joy that I have not only kept my dosage responsible, but that I had finally experienced what MDMA REALLY is, and that less really is more!
3am: Still absolutely flying! Some rather attractive women came up and tried to strike up a conversation (I found out later, she was trying to hit on me), but I was rolling so hard, I had no attention span, so I cut of mid-conversation and started dancing about! I eventually found a female friend who was also rolling face on the dancefloor, and we embraced as a cone of silence came down around us and the world around just blurred. All I could see was beauty, possibly one of the most incredible and unforgettable experiences ever.
4am: I can feel the effects starting to fade around this point, but it was here I noticed a major difference - Where as before I would begin to feel sad and empty about the experience coming to an end, I was still in a great mood and felt full of love for everyone! The club closed at this point, so me and my mate decided to walk home and share a joint on the journey back. We talked about how incredible the night had been, and that we need to do it again enxt year!
5am: Still in a great mood, although I'm starting to feel rather fatigued now. At this point, I'm having a bit of trouble urinating, although this solves itself in half an hour. To my surprise, I start to feel hungry, and I manage a banana and some orange juice before bed. I go to bed smiling to myself, and manage to sleep a solid 6 hours without any issue!
The Following days: I wake up the next morning feeling refreshed and in a great mood (although I feel a bit drained and dehydrated), I manage a full fried breakfast with another glass of orange juice. The afterglow has also been great, with a positive happy mood throughout. I'm on day 3 since the experience, and whilst I can feel a very slight dip in my mood today (day 3 is usually around the time it happens), I still feel relatively up-beat and great! Worthy of note too, is the fact that since the experience, I only suffered one very-small brain-zap on the 2nd night of sleep, but I haven't had any since
On a not so great note, I do now have a terrible sinus cold, probably due to sweating, dancing and sharing a vicks inhaler, so I can't really complain! However, the end consensus to this report is, less is more! Seriously, there is no need for all this 300mg + bollocks. Also, in my opinion, there is also not much need for re-dosing, as a 220mg single dose kept me flying for a good 4-5 hours!
A couple of questions though. what is everyone's view on Carnitine before the MDMA experience? I feel that perhaps it blunted the empathy slightly, together with the amount of eye-wiggles etc. The only reason I ask is because someone posted an article on here about carnitine being effective at blocking alot of MDMA's neurotoxicity, although I'm not sure how true this is. When I next use MDMA (in 3+ months time, I have realized that a 1 month break is FAR to soon!), I will try it without the carnitine. Its interesting how different rolls can place emphasis upon euphoria or empathy, but I have no complaints about my experience at the end of the day!
Cheers for reading
SR :D

a tip: next time you roll at home get some vicks vapo rub and a towel. Apply some vicks generously on an area on the towel about the size of your face (mouth+nose). Lay the towel over your head (sitting down head tilted back, trust me you're going to want to be sitting down for this one, you could fall) with the vicks spot covering your mouth and nose (of course the side with the vicks on the outside) and pull the towel tight. Now inhale VERY long, VERY slow and VERY deep so you inhale the vicks through the towel. This is about twice as intense as a vicks inhaler, if not more