Hello all, I've been stalking this forum for the past week or so and finally decided to post. I've had a tough situation coming down from MDMA in the weeks following usage--I have been scouring the internet for some comfort, but have yet to find anyone's symptoms that match mine exactly--I would be very grateful for any advice you could give. Sorry for the long message, just trying to give you as much relevant information as possible.
1. The Roll) I took some MDMA with friends for the first time on a bachelor party in the afternoon (on a Saturday). I'm not sure exactly how much I took or how pure it was, but my symptoms during the roll were in line with the most common that people experience. I had the jaw clenching, eye wiggles, dilated pupils, etc., no sweating or heart racing. My roll didn't start for about an hour, which took longer than the others, and it didn't seem to last very long. I would say the noticeable effects were around for probably less than 3 hours; at the peak I got a bit overwhelmed but sat down next to a friend and the overwhelming feeling subsided in about 10-15 minutes. We were just sitting on a porch sipping beer (I was not drunk) so I wasn't exerting myself in any way. That night, after the effects of the MDMA had long disappeared, I drank heavily and did a small amount of cocaine, followed up a little later with half a pill of adderall. I got about five hours of mediocre sleep on a couch in the hotel room. The next day I felt loose and generally good while the others got a bad comedown effect (the typical depressed feeling). No one was doing anything smart like taking antioxidants before/during or 5HTP after. I had no idea about those things until I got home the next day.
2. Second Night) That night the troubles started (not the first, but second night after the MDMA). I relaxed in bed watching some TV and started to get really tired, my eyes started to feel heavy and sleep was imminent. At this point I noticed some weird shit happening; I heard birds chirping when there were no birds on the TV or outside; I heard a knock on the door when no one was there; I saw characters on the TV move outside the frame of of the TV. When I closed my eyes to go to sleep, I saw a strange light pattern and outlines of objects, almost as if I could still see something with my eyes closed. I had the feeling that I would have a nightmare cause of all of these weird occurrences, and I was right. I had a terrible nightmare, but worse was what happened when I was waking up; I later discovered I got some mild sleep paralysis, which scared the shit out of me. I was so freaked out and paranoid that I got out of bed and refused to go back to sleep; I made a pot of coffee and drank a few large cups and forced myself to stay up until the following evening.
3. Fourth Day and Beyond) The next evening I was able to sleep without incident, but it was difficult. Tossed and turned and only got a few hours. I felt groggy and a bit off the next day which is understandable given the lack of sleep. The following night, I did a bit better, luckily no sign of hallucinations or nightmares. The following day (Wednesday, 4 days after the MDMA) is when I noticed the still currently lingering effects. I am a computer programmer, and so most of my day consists of staring at a terminal writing code. I noticed when I opened my code window, and even writing this message right now, my eyes and brain just had a hard time focusing. I simply couldn't work. I was scared, but thought it would pass quickly. I am now on my 11th day after the MDMA and these symptoms do not seem to be going away or substantially improving. Occasionally it seems like I may be getting better, but I always seem to regress, especially in the early afternoon. From the fourth day onward, I have been sleeping very well, in fact better than I usually do. I even find myself needing naps in the afternoon which is something I rarely ever would do. In light of the issue, I also gave up coffee on the fourth day.
4. Description of Problem) The exact symptom is hard to describe, but I suppose the term "brain fog" would be accurate. I feel the best usually about 10 minutes after I wake up, as though something has "cleared" out of my brain. Then, about 20-30 minutes after waking, I feel an odd sensation in my head, almost a slight warmth or pressure around the temples, the back of the head near the neck, and kind of under the bridge of my nose. This sensation doesn't seem to have a huge noticeable effect immediately, but it must be related. Keep in mind that aside from the nightmare/sleep paralysis I experienced on the second night, I have not had any significant depression or mood change. If anything, my mood is better than it was before the MDMA. Whatever is happening to me does not feel like a lack of something, but somehow too much of it, as if I still have some kind of residual mood effect from the drug. I can watch TV and walk around and interact with people very well in my current state (albeit still feeling a bit dazed), but the second I sit down in front of the screen to do work, I just can not focus and I can tell something is off. It's a feeling as though it's hard to keep focused on a single line of text, or to move the eyes smoothly along a screen with writing. I notice that while I walk around at night I can see a slight blur or halo around bright lights still, indicating that I still have some kind of sensitivity to light from the MDMA.
5. New Symptoms?) I started feeling an odd pain in my neck/upper back starting yesterday (the 10th day) which I have seen is a common symptom, but usually much sooner after. Could this indicate that the comedown is somehow delayed for me? This morning I also got a bit depressed for the first time (the morning of the 11th day), but it could be I'm just losing hope that I will revert back to normal. The feeling passed fairly quickly, within two hours, then back to the usual feeling.
Has anyone heard of, seen, or experienced any of these symptoms that I am describing? If so, can I hope for a bit of improvement? Even I was 80% better I think I could get my work done.
Thanks for taking the time to read my story, I really appreciate any advice.
1. The Roll) I took some MDMA with friends for the first time on a bachelor party in the afternoon (on a Saturday). I'm not sure exactly how much I took or how pure it was, but my symptoms during the roll were in line with the most common that people experience. I had the jaw clenching, eye wiggles, dilated pupils, etc., no sweating or heart racing. My roll didn't start for about an hour, which took longer than the others, and it didn't seem to last very long. I would say the noticeable effects were around for probably less than 3 hours; at the peak I got a bit overwhelmed but sat down next to a friend and the overwhelming feeling subsided in about 10-15 minutes. We were just sitting on a porch sipping beer (I was not drunk) so I wasn't exerting myself in any way. That night, after the effects of the MDMA had long disappeared, I drank heavily and did a small amount of cocaine, followed up a little later with half a pill of adderall. I got about five hours of mediocre sleep on a couch in the hotel room. The next day I felt loose and generally good while the others got a bad comedown effect (the typical depressed feeling). No one was doing anything smart like taking antioxidants before/during or 5HTP after. I had no idea about those things until I got home the next day.
2. Second Night) That night the troubles started (not the first, but second night after the MDMA). I relaxed in bed watching some TV and started to get really tired, my eyes started to feel heavy and sleep was imminent. At this point I noticed some weird shit happening; I heard birds chirping when there were no birds on the TV or outside; I heard a knock on the door when no one was there; I saw characters on the TV move outside the frame of of the TV. When I closed my eyes to go to sleep, I saw a strange light pattern and outlines of objects, almost as if I could still see something with my eyes closed. I had the feeling that I would have a nightmare cause of all of these weird occurrences, and I was right. I had a terrible nightmare, but worse was what happened when I was waking up; I later discovered I got some mild sleep paralysis, which scared the shit out of me. I was so freaked out and paranoid that I got out of bed and refused to go back to sleep; I made a pot of coffee and drank a few large cups and forced myself to stay up until the following evening.
3. Fourth Day and Beyond) The next evening I was able to sleep without incident, but it was difficult. Tossed and turned and only got a few hours. I felt groggy and a bit off the next day which is understandable given the lack of sleep. The following night, I did a bit better, luckily no sign of hallucinations or nightmares. The following day (Wednesday, 4 days after the MDMA) is when I noticed the still currently lingering effects. I am a computer programmer, and so most of my day consists of staring at a terminal writing code. I noticed when I opened my code window, and even writing this message right now, my eyes and brain just had a hard time focusing. I simply couldn't work. I was scared, but thought it would pass quickly. I am now on my 11th day after the MDMA and these symptoms do not seem to be going away or substantially improving. Occasionally it seems like I may be getting better, but I always seem to regress, especially in the early afternoon. From the fourth day onward, I have been sleeping very well, in fact better than I usually do. I even find myself needing naps in the afternoon which is something I rarely ever would do. In light of the issue, I also gave up coffee on the fourth day.
4. Description of Problem) The exact symptom is hard to describe, but I suppose the term "brain fog" would be accurate. I feel the best usually about 10 minutes after I wake up, as though something has "cleared" out of my brain. Then, about 20-30 minutes after waking, I feel an odd sensation in my head, almost a slight warmth or pressure around the temples, the back of the head near the neck, and kind of under the bridge of my nose. This sensation doesn't seem to have a huge noticeable effect immediately, but it must be related. Keep in mind that aside from the nightmare/sleep paralysis I experienced on the second night, I have not had any significant depression or mood change. If anything, my mood is better than it was before the MDMA. Whatever is happening to me does not feel like a lack of something, but somehow too much of it, as if I still have some kind of residual mood effect from the drug. I can watch TV and walk around and interact with people very well in my current state (albeit still feeling a bit dazed), but the second I sit down in front of the screen to do work, I just can not focus and I can tell something is off. It's a feeling as though it's hard to keep focused on a single line of text, or to move the eyes smoothly along a screen with writing. I notice that while I walk around at night I can see a slight blur or halo around bright lights still, indicating that I still have some kind of sensitivity to light from the MDMA.
5. New Symptoms?) I started feeling an odd pain in my neck/upper back starting yesterday (the 10th day) which I have seen is a common symptom, but usually much sooner after. Could this indicate that the comedown is somehow delayed for me? This morning I also got a bit depressed for the first time (the morning of the 11th day), but it could be I'm just losing hope that I will revert back to normal. The feeling passed fairly quickly, within two hours, then back to the usual feeling.
Has anyone heard of, seen, or experienced any of these symptoms that I am describing? If so, can I hope for a bit of improvement? Even I was 80% better I think I could get my work done.
Thanks for taking the time to read my story, I really appreciate any advice.
