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March staying clean thread

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I'm rolling easy today.. my damn trapeze was in spasm yesterday all day at work.. but that worked itself out.. well i worked it out in hot tub. I feel great today, finally wrapped my head around almost the whole addiction thing.. but working on a few things to do with common addict thought and self sabotage.. haven't done any research any one know..

Hope you all are doing really good.. rx i hope u r feeling better and better.. cloudy i hope you stayed strong.. sepher here a cheer to no more empty bottles and no more god damn hang overs.. and space i hope the gout pain in manageable.. I come from a medical family and will look into anything I can find that may help.. strength to all<3
 
^ Thanks for spreading so much support and love around neversickanymore!

I am spreading best wishes to everyone, and I am so grateful TDS is such a tight and caring community. Threads like this is what makes TDS in my opinion.
 
I haven't smoked all day (o.o)
But my partner is doing better.. Tomorrow she goes on to 9 days without taking anything..
& We both haven't had any hard substances in about 3 or 4 weeks, a personal best since I can even remember.
 
That's great trip! Having someone close in your life that supports you/you're able to get clean with is amazing.
 
I like this thread, thought I would jump in a bit:)

I am stuck in the never ending cycle of running out of pills sooner and sooner each month. I get percs, k-pins, and ambiens....and no matter what schemes to manage my consumption I come up with, I go on a binge with all of them. My last ambien binge had me taking all 30 of them in a few days-don't ask me why, I just start eating them - and I am now stuck in some hideous rebound insomnia. Like I have only had 2 naps of about 1 hour each since monday. No OTC can help, trying baths, crap like that. Right now I am just focusing on vitamins, hydration, and getting a few healthy calories inside me. Anyway, this experience has made me realize that this HAS TO STOP. I get my script for k-pins tomorrow, and my percs on Tuesday, but I would like to taper myself off of both of them. I know I have to, my life is a train wreck because of this, and I do not have the strength to go CT. I have had countless WDs from the booze, but since my last binge resulted in my hospitalization for GI bleeding, I leave that alone for the most part. But when I run out of my scripts, I feel like I have to have it again to help my pill WDs. I need to get out of this mess, and I am scared I won't have the discipline to taper. Hoping I can get a little encouragement here and there and give some back if I can.

Peace,

C.
 
CrazyC said:
I like this thread, thought I would jump in a bit:)

I am stuck in the never ending cycle of running out of pills sooner and sooner each month. I get percs, k-pins, and ambiens....and no matter what schemes to manage my consumption I come up with, I go on a binge with all of them. My last ambien binge had me taking all 30 of them in a few days-don't ask me why, I just start eating them - and I am now stuck in some hideous rebound insomnia. Like I have only had 2 naps of about 1 hour each since monday. No OTC can help, trying baths, crap like that. Right now I am just focusing on vitamins, hydration, and getting a few healthy calories inside me. Anyway, this experience has made me realize that this HAS TO STOP. I get my script for k-pins tomorrow, and my percs on Tuesday, but I would like to taper myself off of both of them. I know I have to, my life is a train wreck because of this, and I do not have the strength to go CT. I have had countless WDs from the booze, but since my last binge resulted in my hospitalization for GI bleeding, I leave that alone for the most part. But when I run out of my scripts, I feel like I have to have it again to help my pill WDs. I need to get out of this mess, and I am scared I won't have the discipline to taper. Hoping I can get a little encouragement here and there and give some back if I can.
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Glad to see another name in the getting/staying clean thread!

I think starting a taper to get clean is a wonderful idea. What better time to do it than now? I kept postponing getting clean, until one day I just got over it and did it. I quit cold turkey from opiates because I'm an all or nothing type of person. I don't have the self control for a taper. If I do something then I put my 110% into it- whether it is an active addiction or getting clean. I've been opiate free after a 2 year addiction since the start of this thread. I was JUST like you. I would get extremely anxious once my prescriptions were running low. I would even cry, get mood swings, horrible overwhelming anxiety, etc. I have an idea of where you're coming from.

Start your taper- you'll thank yourself once you're clean from all these drugs. They're not worth it- it's not where true happiness lies. I haven't found true happiness yet, but I know it does not lie within pharmaceuticals.

I'm rooting for you <3 <3 <3 You can do it!
 
neversickanymore said:
Hey Cloudy.. Man you must be really close too.... man if you want to give the opiots or it all up don't take any of those... 2mg a day of subs.. half life of bupe is is mean 37 hour high 73 hours..

so 2-1 37
1-.5 74
.5-.25 111

+ MAYBE a day or two and acute withdraw is done.. you literally could be a nap away.. and you have worked the whole time.. really do you want to do this nonsense again or just be done.. month and a half from now all paws should be gone.. FREEDOM from that ??? Nice work buy the way, yeah.. cloudy went to work
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Im now on day 10 with no opioids, and the addition of loperamide is doing wonders. Even just helping the intestinal issues is huge. Today I actually feel semi normal, which is nuts. I'm def now going to stick with it since I'm almost half way through 4 weeks, though I imagine I may be done WD after three weeks since it feels reasonably light compared to previous WDs.

If I didn't have work this would be a piece of cake, but since i have to get up at 3 in the morning for a 4am 8 hour shift, the fact that I'm WDing is hard on the mind. I struggle so much to get out of bed its nuts. Atleast my RLS isn't acting up to bad. I do wish I had methadone again for RLS as I have it even with out opioid WDs, but I wont have health insurance for a while and at that point do I really want to get back to taking 30mg of methadone a day,
 
rx_prn said:
Glad to see another name in the getting/staying clean thread!

I think starting a taper to get clean is a wonderful idea. What better time to do it than now? I kept postponing getting clean, until one day I just got over it and did it. I quit cold turkey from opiates because I'm an all or nothing type of person. I don't have the self control for a taper. If I do something then I put my 110% into it- whether it is an active addiction or getting clean. I've been opiate free after a 2 year addiction since the start of this thread. I was JUST like you. I would get extremely anxious once my prescriptions were running low. I would even cry, get mood swings, horrible overwhelming anxiety, etc. I have an idea of where you're coming from.

Start your taper- you'll thank yourself once you're clean from all these drugs. They're not worth it- it's not where true happiness lies. I haven't found true happiness yet, but I know it does not lie within pharmaceuticals.

I'm rooting for you <3 <3 <3 You can do it!
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Thank you so much, I really needed to hear that right now. I hope I can get to where you are soon!
 
^ You will, C, I promise <3 I thought it'd be years before I got clean- but here I am now. I literally woke up one day and decided enough was enough.

If you ever want to chat/vent/etc, my PM box is always open :)
 
Space Firebird said:
I stand corrected,
welcome, and good luck.

Maybe look around for what is considered a "fast taper,"
get motivated, make a plan and go for it! . :)
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It's all good....and you just gave me an excuse to make my 50th post and get BL status=D

And I am a dudette, not a dude....an old dudette at that%)


Worst part of WDs for me is insomnia and the mental aspect. I am stocking up on loperamide, it really helps me with the physical aspects of WD. Benzos will help with sleep, but I am giving them to a friend to dole out to me, I need to lose those as well.

I have my doubts about my ability to taper, may just have to bite the old nasty bullet. Like you, RX, I seem to be an all or nothing person:\

Hope everyone is having a good day so far,

Peace,

C.
 
It's all good....and you just gave me an excuse to make my 50th post and get BL status
Click to expand...

I hope you enjoy your new, all-singing, all-dancing PM box* =D Welcome aboard BTW, good luck with things.

As for me, day 15, still sober. I will not drink today. :)





*May not technically be all-singing or all -dancing, but at least it's properly useable at last. ;)
 
I don't get withdrawal symptoms Goonbag luckily for me, I've been very fortunate there cos I know people who've drunk no more than I have for no longer who get them pretty bad so no, not needed. Would have been nice to have a benzo script for a time cos my sleeping has been well out of whack for months and months but no such luck, the doc won't wear it, much to my frustration at times but that seems to be settling down some at last. Not quite there yet but definitely improving so quite optimistic at the minute. And thanks! :)
 
I'm recovering pretty quick, yeah. It was only a short relapse, massive binge to the point of alcohol poisoning but only a few days of it so it's not like it's really set me back all that much I don't think at all. I'm feeling pretty good physically, mentally together and unusually positive ( for me ), no cravings to speak of so it's all good Goonbag, it's all good. I'll see the month out, and hopefully the next one too. :)
 
CrazyC said:
It's all good....and you just gave me an excuse to make my 50th post and get BL status=D

And I am a dudette, not a dude....an old dudette at that%)


Worst part of WDs for me is insomnia and the mental aspect. I am stocking up on loperamide, it really helps me with the physical aspects of WD. Benzos will help with sleep, but I am giving them to a friend to dole out to me, I need to lose those as well.

I have my doubts about my ability to taper, may just have to bite the old nasty bullet. Like you, RX, I seem to be an all or nothing person:\

Hope everyone is having a good day so far,

Peace,

C.
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The insomnia, cravings, and anxiety were honestly all the most difficult for me also. Oh and RLS. Can't forget that.

Loperamide will be your best friend for any GI issues- it's what allowe me to still go to work and be somewhat productive while going through w/d.
 
Sepher - Glad you didn't make it a long binge, that is great on coming up on 15 days. Booze is a tough one for me as well, usually accompanied with hideous WDs, glad you didn't suffer from those. Here is hoping we NEVER suffer from those again:)

Rx - yeah RLS seems to get worse each time, hope that goes away soon. One of my good friends has been suffering with that all her life, I can't imagine.
 
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goonbag said:
Does BL trigger you at all? Or do you stay away from triggering threads?
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Not when I'm sober and my head's in the right place far as the booze goes, I see it for what it is, rationally. I've been among the most active posters in the alcoholism thread for ages. I found it triggering when I was only half-heartedly trying to get sober, playing around with the Antabuse so I could still get blitzed at weekends but be sober through the week for work trying to keep things together. It was a record of my failure to beat it up with every relapse and that was hard to take. I did avoid the alcohol thread and TDS generally for a while when at low points with the booze.

When sober though it becomes a record of my success, it's reinforcing of the positives rather than the destructive, you know, and those threads are very supportive, I don't find them triggering at all really so long as my head's in the right place with it. I'm an ex-heroin addict too, opiate addiction is one of the things I talk most about in TDS, joined in on heroin threads all over Bluelight, not a flicker. When you're done you're done. I've been done with heroin a very long time, I haven't quite got there with the booze yet. But I will. :)
 
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