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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | Eligiu | deficiT | paranoid android

Make Things Better - SELF HELP.

I dont read books I dont enjoy or stay on roads i feel scared walking down.
 
hahah I am a freak and so I put in anti surveillance routes and if I am being followed I stand and face them and watch them pass me by. They dont like it when you stare them down. but I am a girl
 
sexyanon2 said:
go to wher people like the same things as you

Well, I don't really enjoy anything right now. But I guess i gotta go out and try new things.


what do you study? tell me things you do and dont like. we'll find ideas.

I'm a HS senior, but I'll probably study something in genetics or molecular biology.

do you have any just now>? you want new ones?

Not really. Yes. I probably have to wait for college, but I don't see how college will be any different than high school, besides the freedom of parents.

Hmm.. thx for the reply. :D Little pushes here and there really help to keep the momentum going. [/B]
Click to expand...

point 1) Yes you do enjoy things, you fibber. Do you like I dont know, computers, books> making things? destroying things? Do you like.. dinosaurs? um, kite flying? um - are you good at problem solving? er, picking out faults in stuff? anything - anything at all and that can tie in with finding out your ideal job. You reckon maybe..biology - good stuff, WHAT is it about these things that makes you interested?


wait to go to college before making some mates? dagnam no. you can make friends any time you like. Look at you! What makes you think that peple dont want to know you? For sure I've seen you be a meanie on the boards before but that's not who you are.
What I am reading now is a good and genuine bloke. That.....matters
 
25-03-2005 20:14 (#2889226)
friends - do you have any just now>? you want new ones?

sexy, you and I have had run ins before, you and I have talked before and yuou have given me help and love and support ages ago before. You are wonderful friend material - do you remember how yuo were a honey to me? be a honey to other people and they will flock to you.

you want to meet friends? go to wher people like the same things as you - where they all know something you know - they will come to you to talk, but you have to go to where they are, you know? you tell me what you like, I'll give you ideas. I am full of ideas.

sex - intimacy..... um... well for that you have to pick a girl/ boy who is not a baddie, who will take the time to listen to what you tell them about yourself and your life and who wants to make you happy. easier said than done, but the more bd relationships you have the more you know what you do and dont want from love.

your parents are not you. you are not your parents. other relationships do affect you deeply anc can decide how you live yur life, but you are your own person - bad history doesnt mean bad future. you can start afresh and be whatever you want to be and dont have to take them into consideration - but it hurts if they are not what you want - or not what you need, I know. But you can manage and over time as you sort yurtself out then this will become more clear to you. the answer will.

look for a newjob
what do you study? tell me things you do and dont like. we'll find ideas.

even video games are boring after a while. enjoy it, but it's not your life.

dammit, have to go.... xxxxxx

am I ever glad i found you guys- my dealer got shot last night and I coulda been at his place at the time this incident occured- naturally i am freaked out-
sheesh!
 
^ Eckers mate! Sorry for that but glad for that that you werent there.

you ok?

welcome and please stick about .
here - *passes you an easter egg* get a chair.
 
anxiety

i guess there is a point at which we must force ourselves to do things that our bodies, or our emotions, are telling us not to, but our rational selves are telling us that we should be doing...

its easy to be comfortable staying at home, much more uncomfortable to start a conversation with a stranger... i tend to assume that the pressure on me to 'perform' and seem cool will overpower me... anxiety basically... i also have the classic trait of trying to crack too many jokes to firstly get rid of an awkward atmosphere, and secondly to use smiles and laughter as confirmation that i am liked... i don't have the inbuilt reassurance that i feel others have...

i think its easy to forget that EVERYONE has anxiety, but the part that fights that anxiety can have more strength in some than in others...

twas asked, HOW to get a job, HOW to interact... its by doing the things we don't want to do... we don't want to face people that scrutinise us but unless you do it anyway you will miss out on many opportunities..

its like this: you may meet someone at a party that completely changes your life, that offers you a job and a friendship and even sex!! but the point of being in that position is by firstly, actually turning up to the party (motivation, fighting the urge to stay at home!), and secondly, talking to people until you happen to start chatting to that life-changing person (by being the you that you actually are, and not by being what you think others want you to be)... people really will like you more for being you and not for acting like something else...

i have problems with this... i think it relvolves around guilt, or hiding some inner truth from the world and from myself, which in turn makes the duality of a relationship with someone blurred... i.e. guilt over drugs, homosexual acts (by non-homosexual people! i had my drunken fumblings like loads of people... men and women), crime, all of those things we may feel guilty about... and that puts blocks between us and the normal world... i think you can be in this position without even realising; that is why your consciousness fills up with nervous energy on contact with others... its as if I/we worry about those 'tell-tale signs' that will let the other person know about those 'bad' things we have done... i know what your thinking: thats not true for me, but there is always a reason behind an anxiety problem, always always...

i guess its about accepting the truth of the past, being assured that you are a valid person, being yourself, listening to what others are saying...

but first and foremost, if you hear of even the tiniest opportunity to meet people, like a university club or society, or anything like that... or sit next to someone, ask questions, actually be interested

i mean if u want anyone to be interested in you, you must be interested in them!

jump in!
 
What a fantastic post! I feel really good for having read that - helps put into words the stuff I never can.

''... its as if I/we worry about those 'tell-tale signs' that will let the other person know about those 'bad' things we have done..''

But the thing is that NOBODY knows but you and everybody you meet has the same thing! Everyone is playng it straight for something or other and some just have the mask to cover their insecurities.

Chances are if you are in a room someone else is going to be glad that you do the talking. Personally I'll go into a room and sit back and watch for a small time but if no one is talking, then I will try and get them talking - ask questions or make a joke or something. If people light up, continue and if they dont, then have a chatter with yourself in your head - that's what I do. haha.

Although hee - on my first day at this new job years ago, I was on H mind you so more fearless, but I went in to the new job and there were a batch of us waiting downstairs for the wifie to come and I came in saying, Hello! I am Pomplemous - thank you all for coming, is everyone here? If you'd like to follow me I'll take us up to the training room. They all glumly follow me til I see the real wifie coming so I laugh and go and sit down, leaving them a tad confused. hahaha - that broke the ice hahaha.
 
that and during training I had these snazzy coloured pens which everyone wanted to use. hahahhaa.

KJust goes to show, whoever you are with, wherever you are you are never far from the playground.
 
cleaning the flat sure makes me feel good...
Click to expand...
Amen, but only when on amphetamines.

Other than that, I wish I had more self-improving tendencies, such as the ability to work out at the gym every day, get all of my work done, being 100% perfect in every domain ("I want a perfect body so I can look good next to you" (Thom Yorke)). Then again, as they say, "self improvement is masturbation."
 
or H. I only ever clean when the place is near clean anyway or when I was on H. now it is a real battle to keep place tidy. I just dont care enough.

hahahhah to the rest. aye - it is so easy to go to the gym and yet easier to persuade yourself not to. I persuade myself I am going to let myself down if I have had the thought of doing something good then persuade myself not to, so if I have the thought to do it, then I have to whether I want to or not, cos Ill just be letting myself down not to.
 
I immensely enjoy the smallest things life has to offer.
different coloured shades of grass i see outside.
an insect on the ground or in a tree.
the stars in the sky.
simple things like road construction.

sometimes i find myself in awe at how unbelievably cool stuff is.

I like to take time out each day to stop and notice the small things and when i get the chance I love having d&m's with anyone im comfortable with who is willing for a chat. getting to know other people. how they think and what makes them tick.

being able to do things like this, take time out to notice the small things in life and appreciate them makes things better, always puts a smile on my face.
 
YEYE!!!!! You are my mate for life now! I agree - I A.GREE.

looking around you at the stuff about you - looking at the sky and all its changing colours and shapes, the bird with a worm in its mouth, the light shining off the buildings in the evenings, the gentle colour of the leaves as they unfurl from their winter hibernation - that point when they are so fragile and soft and translucent and all different colours. WOW! that cat that came to say hello to you on your way to work, the patterns of straggly worms on the pavements

it is all there - the beauty is all there, but you gotta look up!!!
 
Fully, Even better is when get to share these experiences with someone, anyone else that cares.
theres more to life than meets the eye.
 
hmmmm *wistfully* a whole universe up there bigger than us. sure puts you in your place sometimes.
 
^^^^PM me Pomplemous.
would be keen to have chats with u anytime, I think ur pretty funkn cool
 
no.

um, and dont be afraid to lose face - you are not too cool or too old to play - I LOVE playing on the see saw and wobbly horse in th park - even at 28 - I adore it. I find immense pleasure in pushing people into cow poo in the field. especially the more elaborate dance to avoid it hahaha.
I adore playing hide and seek with my mates when they conceed, top fun! tickling! just being a kid sometimes when you want to be is just plain honest fun.
 
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