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Heroin MA heroin V3 I'm wicked jammed kid

What's going on, my Massholes?? Pretty quiet here; what, did everyone all of a sudden get straight, or just plain lazy to post anything anymore?? I'm still here checkin' in every so often and unfortunately still doin' the doogie...the Knockouts are the only consistent bags round here. Also the Steelers and Rolex are around...the Rolex are pretty good imo, when I first tried them I had already done like 3 or 4 of the Knockouts and did 1 of the Rolexes and I swear I thought I was OD'ing...got that rush that didn't want to stop, got fuckin' scared for a minute and grabbed the Narcan just in case but it subsided and just like that it faded away...bleh...I really should be getting my ass on a program or just stop cold (yeah right!!) Got the arraignment coming up on the 28th of Dec but as you may well suspect I'm putting it off as long as I can...I know these are just excuses but I don't look forward to waiting in the brutal cold for buses ( have to take two just to get to them, any of them since they're all DOWNTOWN!!! it's fuckin' ridiculous that they're all in one part of the city instead of spread around the city). If I manage to get clean I'm going to have to move in with my sister to stay clean since she lives in the outskirts of the city where there's very little if no availability of dopelike where I live now where there's dope everywhere. So what's everyone doin these days?? Haven't heard a peep besides bloodshot eyes...Would love to hear from other MassHoles out there....Anyways, PEACE out...Raz
 
Hey man, are you in Springfield? I'm from the Boston area and although I haven't been affiliated with the dope scene for some time, there was a pretty big difference between dope in Springfield/Holyoke as opposed to Boston and the inner suburbs. Holyoke tended to sell dope in the form of tickets and bundles, whereas we would always buy grams in the form of 0.8g baggies of brown powder.

Yea, part of me misses the scene. I mostly meet all the cute chicks I used to meet in pursuit of drugs... not. Think "Ted"... "Haaaaduh! Haaaaduh!"
 
I wish I were "wicked jammed kid" today. Goddamn. I start dating again and now my life is a fucking entirely different roller coaster of bullshit.
 
What's up my brothers and sisters?...Just checking back in since it's been awhile...well the arraignment went better than I expected. The DA stood up and stated "We have decriminalized possession and changed it from a criminal matter to a civil matter and propose a $200 fine"...The judge said something but I didn't hear a damn thing he said; I was screaming inside my head "YEEEEEAAAAAHHH!!!" Guess the amount was too small to bother to prosecute...idk, it was only 10 bags I had for my personal use. Anyways the judge asked me how long I needed to pay the fine and i told him "60 days"...so I have that time to pay up or then they will issue an arrest warrant...he suggested I get help and I wholeheartedly agreed. And that was it...didn't give me probation or suspend my license or anything...I was soooo fuckin' happy I like bounced out of the courtroom, lol... Now I have to come up with 200 bucks by Feburary 25th and get that shit off my back...Honestly I think I was just happy I didn't have to stop using to tell you the truth...thought they would throw me in a treatment program or make me go to a methadone clinic. I do want to clean myself up but I'll do it when Im' damn good and ready...guess I'm not hunh? still poking myself every day with Knockouts that my brother gets, they're ok gone down a bit...have another guy who gets different shit every day...Rolex, Walking Dead, Pandas(really good shit!!!), Empires (meh...), and the other day he got Audis which totally fuckin' suck ballz I mean did three bags one after the other and felt NOTHING!!! Was pissed off with that one...but you know how it is garbage always comes around once in a while; what can you do? Can't tell they're garbage by looking at them or by the brand. Anyways hope everyone's doin good in this new year and staying safe....Peace!!! Raz
 
RaZkaL86 said:
What's up my brothers and sisters?...Just checking back in since it's been awhile...well the arraignment went better than I expected. The DA stood up and stated "We have decriminalized possession and changed it from a criminal matter to a civil matter and propose a $200 fine"...The judge said something but I didn't hear a damn thing he said; I was screaming inside my head "YEEEEEAAAAAHHH!!!" Guess the amount was too small to bother to prosecute...idk, it was only 10 bags I had for my personal use. Anyways the judge asked me how long I needed to pay the fine and i told him "60 days"...so I have that time to pay up or then they will issue an arrest warrant...he suggested I get help and I wholeheartedly agreed. And that was it...didn't give me probation or suspend my license or anything...I was soooo fuckin' happy I like bounced out of the courtroom, lol... Now I have to come up with 200 bucks by Feburary 25th and get that shit off my back...Honestly I think I was just happy I didn't have to stop using to tell you the truth...thought they would throw me in a treatment program or make me go to a methadone clinic. I do want to clean myself up but I'll do it when Im' damn good and ready...guess I'm not hunh? still poking myself every day with Knockouts that my brother gets, they're ok gone down a bit...have another guy who gets different shit every day...Rolex, Walking Dead, Pandas(really good shit!!!), Empires (meh...), and the other day he got Audis which totally fuckin' suck ballz I mean did three bags one after the other and felt NOTHING!!! Was pissed off with that one...but you know how it is garbage always comes around once in a while; what can you do? Can't tell they're garbage by looking at them or by the brand. Anyways hope everyone's doin good in this new year and staying safe....Peace!!! Raz
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Hey buddy, glad to hear that you stayed out of trouble, and weren't forced to do a treatment program or other thing that you didn't want to do.

Detox and treatment can be great, but most of the time, the lesson is only going to sink in if you're ready to receive it. Hopefully you will get there soon, as I know it isn't fun after a while of just poking yourself everyday. It gets old.

Wishing you the best of luck in your journey bro! :good vibes:
 
Been getting "exit 3" for like 3 months and "walking dead" on and off, both ok, good but nothing that knocks you put
 
Where is everybody? I moved too far from Holyoke, so I'm trying to figure out how I ever got myself set up so I can start over put Herr in between Springfield and Worcester. I've been too sick for too long a day I'm starting to not keep my life together so idk. Maybe someone else has had to do this and has tips.
 
what's up brother...or sis; can't tell by your handle...Yeah this place has been dead for a while, well you know what they say; everyone's gotten sober, dead or in jail or a detox. IDK what's goin on here as for me I'm in Springfield and if you have read my posts you can see I'm a vet at this game... They don't look too kindly to ppl asking for "tips" assuming you're looking for spots to score or whatever but anyways welcome to the MA thread and hope you stick around, cause I really need someone to talk to here since there's no one else to chat with...hope to read from you soon!!!
 
MJWojo said:
Where is everybody? I moved too far from Holyoke, so I'm trying to figure out how I ever got myself set up so I can start over put Herr in between Springfield and Worcester. I've been too sick for too long a day I'm starting to not keep my life together so idk. Maybe someone else has had to do this and has tips.
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Please remember that under the BLUA, we do not permitting sourcing (attempting to acquire illicit or gray market substances) here on Bluelight. If those are the "tips" you are looking for, then this is not the place.
 
And I'm not going to delete it, I'll show my shame .. and I'm getting sober instead! I'm almost through it, too.
 
MJWojo said:
And I'm not going to delete it, I'll show my shame .. and I'm getting sober instead! I'm almost through it, too.
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Great to hear man! I suggest building some healthy habits like daily exercise and meditation to help you both get and stay sober. People with addictions usually spend a lot of time on said addictions, and it can be difficult to maintain near/full abstinence without filling that time with something else.

You may also want to check out our Health & Recovery subforum.
 
Well either this thread has gone dead (haha)...or there's no one to chat with cause they're locked up, or it's not interesting anymore...Meanwhile I'm here still jabbing myself in the hand looking for that perfect rush. We all know that's not gonna happen but we do it anyways...called insanity right? But the other day I met my neighbor's son who happens to hang in HolySmoke... and he happened to have on him these bags I forgot ther name but he warned me ahead of time that this was straight Fenty. Just did half of it and that shit hit me like a brick wall at 100 mph...could barely stand much less talk...wow...what if he hadn't warned me ahead of time? I would definitely NOT BE HERE to tell you this!!! Now THAT'S HOW YOU DO BUSINESS...you don't want to be killing your custys. Now when I said half of it I meant HALF A BAG...that's how strong it is. I know probably 3/4 of you would call me stupid for doing this but I told him I didn't want anything to do with that shit, that's how much it scared me...Tell me...what would you have done in my shoes....not fuck with it or just dabble with it and take your life in your hands every time you banged a shot or sniffed a bump of it....just curious...
 
RaZkaL86 said:
Well either this thread has gone dead (haha)...or there's no one to chat with cause they're locked up, or it's not interesting anymore...Meanwhile I'm here still jabbing myself in the hand looking for that perfect rush. We all know that's not gonna happen but we do it anyways...called insanity right? But the other day I met my neighbor's son who happens to hang in HolySmoke... and he happened to have on him these bags I forgot ther name but he warned me ahead of time that this was straight Fenty. Just did half of it and that shit hit me like a brick wall at 100 mph...could barely stand much less talk...wow...what if he hadn't warned me ahead of time? I would definitely NOT BE HERE to tell you this!!! Now THAT'S HOW YOU DO BUSINESS...you don't want to be killing your custys. Now when I said half of it I meant HALF A BAG...that's how strong it is. I know probably 3/4 of you would call me stupid for doing this but I told him I didn't want anything to do with that shit, that's how much it scared me...Tell me...what would you have done in my shoes....not fuck with it or just dabble with it and take your life in your hands every time you banged a shot or sniffed a bump of it....just curious...
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Because of the way the tolerance with fetty works up so quick, I am a 25 yr veteran of the opiate epidemic, so it's safe to say, I know where and who has the goodie good goods, I am 💯 telling the truth by telling you, I put a griz in the cooker, when I plug in. I couldn't get a nod, if I took bah with it.. all I can say is: don't shoot alone, keep narcan, respect the drug and the nod.
 
Hey pimp howz it goin? Yeah you're right definitely have to respect the drug...some ppl I know are just reckless and get something they haven't tried yet and drop three or four in the cook thinking it's just normal shit and that's the quick way to the grave. I myself have been doing it for about 34 years no exaggeration...1987 I did my first snort not knowing what to expect. My buddies said it was like smoking weed but it's anything but that...the warm rush that starts in your stomach and creeps it's way up your body. There's just no way to describe it unless you do it yourself...LOVED IT INSTANTLY...asked them if they could get more of this awesome stuff. Didn't equate it with HEROIN, that awful drug that kills everyone. A while before that I had a cousin who was deep into it I really didn't know what the heck it is but I heard that he died because he was sold a bag of ground up glass...just what I heard don't know if it was true or not. Anyways later on in high school my best bud was doin it and I had no idea til he offered me some and I readily said hell yeah gimme some!!! From then it was just a weekend get-high but unfortunately in that time my father became very ill and was hospitalized. Cancer it turned out to be and it started in his pancreas and by the time he was diagnosed it had gotten into his bones and that was it. He died December 24th, 1987 and just ruined Christmas for me after that...then it turned into an every day thing. Snorting it for 10 years before graduating to the needle and that was that. I've been fighting it for years, detox probably 7 or 8 times since and MMT (methadone) like 4 or 5 times i lost track. Well that's my history and it's still going. Respect the drug and the nod...agree totally...hope to hear from you again brother...take care....Raz
 
mybloodshoteyes said:
Use to check in on here but haven't really been in the mix, sending some love. My boy use to post in here to, he od'd this past winter. Much love and hope all yall are still holding strong and hanging in. Staying away from the dog maybe forever but definitely for now. I'll find it again in another life if not again in this one. We are who we are. But for the time being, I'm putting down that leash, so to speak.
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Sorry to hear about your friend. Good on you for doing some self improvement.
 
I moved from the Holyoke area in 2018 when I could still get good Heroin. I've been in Baltimore since then and it changed to Fentanyl pretty much as soon as I moved out here. Anybody in the Holyoke/Springfield area know if its Fentanyl there too or is there still some Heroin around?
 
I miss this. Honestly. Feels like a different world out here , unfamiliar and cold. Easier sometimes, but other times, not so much . Everyone says they're proud of me be side I turned my life around. Sometimes, I just don't feel that way.

Doesn't look like anyone kicking around here or old forums like these anymore. But shit, this use to be a fuckin LIFELINE way back when lol maybe I'm just broken in my head. Ain't no reason to go back, but I feel so fuckin dead and restless inside at the same time and this beast knew how to soothe my fuckin soul I'll tell ya.

I'll tell ya this, I got one more good run left in me. But shit, we all feel that way don't we?
 
mybloodshoteyes said:
I miss this. Honestly. Feels like a different world out here , unfamiliar and cold. Easier sometimes, but other times, not so much . Everyone says they're proud of me be side I turned my life around. Sometimes, I just don't feel that way.

Doesn't look like anyone kicking around here or old forums like these anymore. But shit, this use to be a fuckin LIFELINE way back when lol maybe I'm just broken in my head. Ain't no reason to go back, but I feel so fuckin dead and restless inside at the same time and this beast knew how to soothe my fuckin soul I'll tell ya.

I'll tell ya this, I got one more good run left in me. But shit, we all feel that way don't we?
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How long you been clean?
 
somnilicious said:
How long you been clean?
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Shit I turned my entire life off about almost 2 years ago now. No Facebook, no contact with a lot of friends, went completely straight and been doing laboring jobs doing construction . But honestly, it's all just a job. I don't really care. I got an apartment, a dog, a little beater car. But I just feel so fucking soulless man. Got a good girl at home, she talks about marriage and kids. Im not built for that shit. I can do it, but this shit, deep down I don't know if this straight and narrow shit is for me. Starting to feel like, damned if I do, damned if I don't, damned to hell either way. It's like, live like this and feel nothin, or live like that just to feel ANYTHING.
 
mybloodshoteyes said:
Shit I turned my entire life off about almost 2 years ago now. No Facebook, no contact with a lot of friends, went completely straight and been doing laboring jobs doing construction . But honestly, it's all just a job. I don't really care. I got an apartment, a dog, a little beater car. But I just feel so fucking soulless man. Got a good girl at home, she talks about marriage and kids. Im not built for that shit. I can do it, but this shit, deep down I don't know if this straight and narrow shit is for me. Starting to feel like, damned if I do, damned if I don't, damned to hell either way. It's like, live like this and feel nothin, or live like that just to feel ANYTHING.
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Do you think you might be giving too much credit to the heroin ? Did you really have a good life when you were using?

The only reason I ask is because I use to feel the same way. I didn't do H but I popped pills ( opioids and benzos.....all i could get my hands on ) and yeah.....they made me feel great but my life sucked. Always broke, always chasing, always justifying, always lying to hide my use, always hanging around the wrong people that didn't give two flips about me unless I had $$......and lots more.

Yep, I have no euphoria in my life anymore and you bet I miss the feeling and my life is boring and it's mundane and it's kinda blah but ya know what.....it really is better than the way it was. I have $$ in my pocket, my family trusts me again, I'm not lying or stealing grandma's pills, I'm not around people that just wanted my $$ and pretended to be my friend and I'm not out running the roads in search of my next high.

If you can, try and appreciate the woman, the job and the stable life because it may be boring as all get out......but it can indeed be a good life. Just have to not give the H so much power. The H wasn't your friend. Not even close. High was great but that's about it. Euphoria is all warm and cozy until it bites us in the ass.
 
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