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love

I hate to rip into you Dagny, but do we really need another teenage-angst love poem? I'm not saying it isn't effective and direct, only that it is too superficial. Intensity of emotion can not, on its own, make a poem, especially one about desire! Poetry is an act of creation, not merely an act of description. I see the creative impulse throughout the poem, but it is subordinated to the easy way out of simple description even when the seeds of poetic metaphor are there. Take it to the next level, I know you can!
 
5HT-2: I appreciate your criticism. Thank you for taking the time to think it through and respond, there isn't enough of that. But I also would like you to know something: I do not write poetry to fit any idea of what poetry should be. When I write something down on paper (or computer screen) it is usually just to get it out of my head long enough to fit in something else. Teenage angst? I have not been a teenager for a very long time, although I appreciate the sentiment. ;)
This was written for me, to remember a moment that was special to me, a person that was special to me. If the words themselves are superficial, so be it. For the memory itself is not, I assure you of that. I'm not a poet darling, I'm a scientist. My creation and innovation come in a lab, surrounded by chemicals, or in an equation that I'll spend weeks on. Poetry, prose, all the literary stuff, I don't want to be great at it. I'll take the intense emotions over the words any day. :)
Thank you again for your time on this. If you want deeper, do a search and read some of my other stuff. Maybe it's a habit of mine not to take it as far as I could ... I dunno. But it sure feels good to get it all out now and then.
[ 30 May 2002: Message edited by: Dagny ]
 
The reason I enjoy reading Dagny's words is because they are full of emotion. I also like to write from my heart. Form and structure serve a purpose, yet why restrict ourselves to that? Is it any less poetic if it doesn't have the "correct" form? I'm not saying to throw convention out the window but it's refreshing to see it pushed aside once in a while.
 
^^^ exactly. Raw emotion and passion can often be conveyed better unconventionally :) . In this piece of Dagny's writing her memories of those special moments are what spoke to me. Just because love and lust are written about often, doesn't mean that it's any less special when someone writes their heart out on the screen anew :) .
I'm a scientist too, so I can understand how writing out lustful passionate moments does it for you Dagny. Thanks for sharing it with us :) .
 
I love her writings, I am just expressing how i felt when i read them, First it made me shudder inside, brought something to the surface, then I felt her passion, and laughted how amazing her words revealed such compassion beautifully, how else can I reveal my thoughts about it without feelings? I wasn't analizing it, no no no, for God's sake no it was breathtaking.
[ 31 May 2002: Message edited by: nvr2old ]
 
Some people think I am criticizing these words for their lack of meter, rhyme, etc. I AM NOT! It is the content. Analysis IS necessary to dissect the layers of meaning and find out how deep they go. Maybe I just have a problem relating to this kind of stuff written by women, but I have a feeling that if a guy wrote that he would not get nearly as much praise…maybe its because history has far more male poets than female. Also, it would not have as much impact coming from a guy because that is more of a societal expectation for young men. I feel that I am unable to fully appreciate this poem because I am a young white man who has studied the poetry of a shitload of other white men. Ah, the irony.
I do not write poetry to fit any idea of what poetry should be. When I write something down on paper (or computer screen) it is usually just to get it out of my head long enough to fit in something else.
Elaborate, please. Automatic writing? Stream-of-Consciousness? Do you go back over your poetry to polish and refine it, or do you just "get it out" and be done with it?
I have considered posting some of my poetry to this board but have decided against it because I don't think any of it is polished enough to be considered "finished." First, I try to "get it out" so that I can see on paper the problem I am tackling poetically, and then I go back over it until it feels right. Every word matters and must be chosen carefully to give life to the interplay of images and metaphors. Not that this profusion takes away from the passion, or rawness; rather, it can add to it! Any of you ever read Rimbaud?
BTW I am a scientist (in school to be one at least) as well as a poetry nut.
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