Dude... Serious high-five... I know you don't FEEL that great but just looking at what you've accomplished... Father, son, chef, husband, 40k salary job, and most of all, staying clean for a year...!!! Holy shit!
In a year or two you will be looking back at this time and thinking, "wow, I really did it!" And everyone around you will be just as proud. I know people (even strangers like myself) are already happy for you, even if you feel like a failure. That's just the lack of drugs fucking with the chemicals in your brain. When it comes down to it though, regardless of how you feel, you're doing GREAT.
I hope you can continue to find healthy outlets, as someone suggested above. Write some poetry, write your own cookbook, vent on Bluelight, find a support group or hotline to call when you really feel at your wit's end, pick up an instrument... Lost goes on and on. I know, I know, easier said than done, but you're already winning
I believe in you, and have so much respect for you. *hugs* I hope you feel better soon. This pit won't last forever. Soon your brain will adjust and the joys of life will bring you a better, more sustainable high than any drug ever could.
In a year or two you will be looking back at this time and thinking, "wow, I really did it!" And everyone around you will be just as proud. I know people (even strangers like myself) are already happy for you, even if you feel like a failure. That's just the lack of drugs fucking with the chemicals in your brain. When it comes down to it though, regardless of how you feel, you're doing GREAT.
I hope you can continue to find healthy outlets, as someone suggested above. Write some poetry, write your own cookbook, vent on Bluelight, find a support group or hotline to call when you really feel at your wit's end, pick up an instrument... Lost goes on and on. I know, I know, easier said than done, but you're already winning
I believe in you, and have so much respect for you. *hugs* I hope you feel better soon. This pit won't last forever. Soon your brain will adjust and the joys of life will bring you a better, more sustainable high than any drug ever could.
