Looking for someone more wise than me to provide insight...

[Phat_J]

Hey everyone!

Here we go. I roll about 4 times a year, at raves, 1-3 pills a night depending on the length of the event. Massively good fun. Anyways...

I am working on my career currently, and my focus is to be a coach to others in terms of quality lifestyle, enjoying life to it's fullest, helping others reach their full potential, and etc.

What I find is, when I'm rolling with my friends, all this stuff I've learned from my coaches, personal development books, cds, and videos, just comes out naturally. Like my friend will open up about some problem, and I can provide encouragement and direction for them to sort it out. In fact one of my friends was saying how he could be like me in that regard.

While sober however, this wealth of knowledge and such doesnt seem to flow naturally, it takes a lot more effort for it to come out. Or, certain ideas dont even surface when I know they should.

It's kind of like, being able to regurgitate a bunch of concepts you learned from a text book at school after taking a magic pill, while otherwise you'd draw blanks straining yourself to piece together what you just learned without the pill.

This must have something to do with elements of everyday normal life becoming the forefront of my thoughts, and the rest kinda gets buried.

How would I be able to get this to come out naturally in every day life?

I realize this could raise a debate over the whole reason we enjoy ecstasy and the like, to escape from everyday life, and if we could enjoy life fully without stimulants, then we wouldnt use them, and etc. But hopefully someone understands what I'm saying here.

And no I'm not about to roll everyday just to solve this!

Thanks!

 

[MazDan]

Best advice is to stay away from drugs all together.

There is enough user reported evidence to suggest that there may be some truth to the concept that mdma causes short term memory loss so pills are not a good answer at all.

Most likely your problems relate to experience and self confidence.

As you do more of your work, so to will your experience levels grow and in turn your self confidence. It just takes time.

Everyone starts off this way so dont think your any different.

Believe in yourself.

 

[MD Specialist]

It seems to me that you know the information you've learned.. But the only time you really believe it or feel comfortable telling others is when your high on E. I feel as though the easiest solution is to just keep practicing and practicing, and telling your friends or family your teachings over and over again until it will just become second nature. Especially if your making this your career. If you are teaching this to others than you need to show others that you are comfortable with it, and that the info will help others lives like it has your own.

As we all know E makes talking to people a lot easier, especially when talking about emotions and deep beliefs.

 

[khald]

Agree with the above posters, especially MazDan. If you know it while you're high, then you obviously have that information stored in your brain somewhere. Maybe it's an issue of confidence? I, for one, always try to mentally solve whatever problem is presented (broken-this, not working-that, etc), but I rarely speak up, or offer my opinion about it.. I know it's a confidence issue for me.

 

[Pans-Advocate]

The answer is easy: practice!

As you said, it's really easy to empathize with people, understand their problems, and have authentic emotional communication with people when you're rolling. It just comes naturally. The fact of the matter is that it CAN be like that all the time, if you get into the right habits and cultivate enough awareness in yourself.

I'd recommend meditation and/or yoga to start. Basically, part of the point of the breathing and stretching exercises that you do during meditation or yoga is to take your mind off all that daily-life stuff that you said gets in the way of the real wisdom you want to flow naturally through you. The more you practice with meditation and yoga, the better you are at quieting down all the normal-daily-life chatter in your mind, and the easier it'll be to just be present with someone who wants to talk to you about the real stuff.

You can also just start making an effort to be more present in daily conversation with people. Sitting and quieting your mind down on your own for 20 minutes a day is really helpful, but if it's the only 20 minutes out of the day that you make the effort, it becomes an escape instead of a lifestyle, and the results don't show. Just, you know, pay more attention.

It's really too intuitive for anyone to be able to explain it without sounding really simplistic. Just, you know, try. It'll happen over time if you work at it.

 

[Bsiren]

In a great "trip report" I've read, the guy says it quite well: "the high subsides, but the lucidity lingers"- you cannot force this, but you can try to reconnect emotionally with the lack of boundaries and fear you had while rolling. Your rolling schedule sounds very responsible- 4x a year is admirable, and keeping your tolerance low (1-3 pills is great!) is key. There are a couple threads regarding how MDMA has affected people in their sober every-day life personally, and what makes MDMA unique is that a lot of users, even after they stop, profess the personal and emotional benefits it provided them. I think you just have to be abke to connect and understand the clarity of MDMA when you are not on it. By far, my favorite part of MDMA has been how much it has improved my sense of compassion and enthusiasm for life and those I love.