Misc Long term effects & addictive properties of Methylphenidate...regrets??

[MissJunkie]

I'm just curious if anyone else seriously regrets their decision to use Methylphenidate (I know I saw an abbreviation for this...can't remember it now though) or similar substances after realizing just how hard core the addiction can become and how FAST it seems to occur for some people. I think if I would have researched it BEFORE I took it, knowing my own addictive tendencies, I may have thought twice about even taking it as prescribed. I was legitimately given this for adult ADHD. Thank GOD I didn't take it as a kid! I am seriously against any child EVER taking this stuff because IMO it's NOT worth the long term, permanent damage it does to your dopamine receptors. No wonder there are so many people now from their mid twenties on up who are either addicts or severely depressed. I don't think they ever really had a chance, given the physical damage this crap does!!

This is my personal DOC for a few reasons. First off, I can get it prescribed. Of course no doc in their right mind would ever prescribe the amount I now need to maintain a "normal" feeling throughout the day, but at least I get some of it legit. I've always had issues with depression, so the euphoria I noticed from the very first oral dose was mind blowing. Of course combine a mental illness and an addictive personality and whaddaya got? ME!! Then of course learning the fine art of insufflation took me to the next level and that was pretty much it. No turning back now. Reading about people who wean off gradually is just pointless IMO because the damage is already done. It's not even the physical addiction that gets you. It's the fact that it alters your brain's ability to produce and/or "read" those dopamines forever. Scary shit if you ask me...I kinda like my happy chemicals!!

I've done coke. It's all right. I mean it's great to be honest, but too quick for me. I don't wanna have this major high & then crash that hard. It was probably the worst comedown of my life. And I don't like the fact that I felt like a hardcore junkie when 10 minutes later I was frantically cutting another line...repeatedly. Like I said, I like to maintain, not get high. It's hard for me to get that awesome euphoric feeling anymore simply because I'd have to use an amount that makes my heart pound so hard and fast that it hurts. I'm not trying to die for a fix. I've read a lot about people preferring Adderall, saying they get more of a euphoric rush from that than Methylphenidate. Weird, but I didn't have that feeling. For me, all it did was wake me up BIG TIME. It got me jittery and just plain awake. No happy. No creative burst. No feeling good at all. Just awake, irritated because I couldn't go to sleep, and chain smoking like a fool. Or maybe I did something wrong....I'm willing to try again with pointers. haha

I have no issues admitting I'm an addict. This stuff is Satan in pill form if you ask me. I only say that because I've had my bouts with many drugs and this is the only one I've ever felt so helpless to stop. When I did my research and learned why, I kicked myself in the ass for not doing that research to begin with. I researched every other pill I've ever been prescribed, and believe me that's a lot. I'm bipolar...med cocktails galore! Guess I was just so happy at the thought of a "miracle pill" that could make me focus better that I did what the doc told me to do. What a good, obedient little girl I am!!

I'm curious if there are many other people out there who use this. I know it's not quite as commonly used as amphetamines, at least from what I've seen, but I've never really gone that route regularly. All I want is to feel somewhat normal, not high & manic. I'm wondering if i have any other options that may be safer in the long run. It doesn't take long before I notice I need dose increase to maintain. It's been about a year now & I'm almost ashamed to admit how much I have to use daily now. And when I run out & don't have access to more for a period of time...OMG the depression is awful and I can't stay awake to save my life. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. I can deal with the physical withdrawals. They last about 2 days for me then I'm fine. But the moods & inability to stay awake are pure hell.

Any thoughts? Anyone?

 

[Lopez]

looks like someone's currently on it. anyway i don't find methyl addictive at all. it's a good, mild buzz with a mild crash. i'd compare it to yohimbe except with a more euphoric edge. the stuff is not really worth my time and even when i get them for free i end up giving them away. amphetamines however are a different story, i find them to be a MUCH cleaner with MUCH more euphoria (not many negative physical effects). in fact i actually took some this morning

i also find myself craving 2 days after i use adderall (the day right after is spent sleeping and eating with a constant feeling like i damaged my brain). what you can do with any strong upper is treat it as if it was ecstasy, take it once a week as a treat for yourself. this REALLY inhibits the development of tolerance and addiction.

 

[MissJunkie]

I am currently on it...prescribed too. Never touched amphetamines, but have heard that they don't have many negative physical effects. But like I said, I don't get a buzz from the methyl. Now I take as much as I do, which is about double what's prescribed (aside from the crazy "freak out" days lol) only to maintain some sort of "normalcy" in my brain. Not looking for a buzz so much as I am just to function. And I do have ADHD...problem is, the stuff stops helping with it once you hit a certain point. I just need something I can take daily that gives me what feels like a normal ability to feel happy & functioning with the least amount of side effects possible. Don't even know which scripts are amphetamines...jeez I feel so naive anymore. Guess I've been out of the racket too long. LMAO

Guess I'm a weird addict...I don't really use much of anything to get high anymore. Used to but that seems like soooooo long ago. Now I'm just trying my best to pretend to be a normal, functioning member of society with whatever means I have. Besides, I have 3 kids...I kinda like being aware of what they're doing. Wouldn't want them to start using drugs now would I?? Only baaaaaad people do that.... lol

 

[NeighborhoodThreat]

Only baaaaaad people do that.... lol

Hope you're kidding

 

[MissJunkie]

Of course I'm kidding. DUH!!

 

[MrRoot]

I used methylphenidate on a daily basis selfmedicating my depressive stage year ago. Did one 10mg at a morning just after the alarm clock ring and waited for 15-30 minutes laying in my bed just to get myself started. Then I drunk half a litre of coffee to get myself at school. At school I did another 10mg of methylphenidate during the meal. I used this because I read a study of using stimulants with antidepression medications for severe depression that does not react to antidepression meds but as it is a new study it is not used widely in our healthcare and here they dont treat adult ADHD with stimulants.

It was a way to cope with depression and did quite well for it. I was able to function normally at school and get good grades. Also I did it recreationally couple of times with alcohol and it stayed in my control. I also lost 10 kilos of fat without actually exercising.

I stopped cold turkey when I find myself going to a remissive stage after three months usage. Had no noticeable withdrawals and havent since used methylphenidate even though I have them at hand and got an urge to start using when I quitted consuming over 1gram of caffeine a day few days ago and slept like 14 hours a day.

I havent noticed any long term effects but my usage was only three months and with low doses. I think it is quite safe and effective drug when used noncreationally with good purposes and with low/prescribed doses.