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Lapse: Poems By A Recovering Teen Addict

TheAgnostic

TheAgnostic

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 5, 2010
Messages
169
Location
Columbus | Cleveland | OH
First i will introduce myself, im J.P a grateful recovering addict. Ive been clean 6 months today, i recently completed an inpatient drug rehabilitation program and life has never been better. Throughout my 4 month stay in rehab i kept a journal, where i wrote poetry daily, im creating this thread for anyone else who once an open forum to post their poetry, and i hope my poetry is well recieved by all who read them, i hope at least one person can relate to me or gets something out of my poems or writings, feel free to post comments or your own poetry.

B.H
Blue Fort
Sitting atop a mt.
Under constant
Siege from within
It never ends
They never stop
Cycle on repeat
Like the game
Of life,
reset,
We start anew
They build
We break
They try
We quit
They Create
And we destroy
They leave
While we stay
All fueling a discontent
That we feel everyday
Punishment on public display
I will rise above this one day

January Freedom
The day of redemption
Night of uncertainty
Beginning of a new life
Day by Day
No more wasting this life
Away,
Doing Everything w/ Purpose
& Giving away the gift
To those who are open & willing
& Ready for change

To Love
To Love You must
First Die
In Death
You are Reborn
A new misdirect
Restoring Gratitude
For the miracle
That is your being
Same Body
Same Problems
No more limitations
Once you've met death
You can no longer
Complain about Life
When the hands of
Death Grip your throat
And all that you love
Begins to drift away
That is when you know
what hell is
& once you've
beaten death once
escaping its pull
You will never
Be more alive
 
Amen to that last one! (As someone who has died and nearly died a few times in my past)
I've never felt more alive than the times just coming down off a highly traumatic medical situation like a flash asthma attack. Damn, once that breath starts getting squeezed outta you it's curtains unless you get some epinepherine in your system quick. A little IV benadryl and steroid helps too. Anywho... the point is your breath is your most important thing in life. Cherish that!
 
Dillon Lake
Open Sky
Stars Burn
Viewed From afar
Look miniscual
Together however
Forming Constellations
That Have awed
Humanity For eons
Under The Same Sky
The first man was born
Under The same stars
The first Civilization was built
Under The Same Constellations
I sit alone
Drowning my sorrows
In a bottle
Viewed from afar
My Choices are victimless
Together forming a life of regret
& missed oppurtunities,
under the same sky.
 
Self Satisfaction
Utmost Greed
Pursue in life
Whatever you need
Fuck the laws
Fuck Fate
& Fuck morals
Strive for what you want
& no matter what
Never fall Short
Never look back
Never Show Remorse
For the ones
You Hurt
Created the monster
You've become
Planting the seed
Of ruthlessness
in you at birth
Now take
Back what is
yours.
 
Science
Cures the sick
Feeds the impoversied
Explans the unknown
Takes man to the moon
Causes no wars
Promotes no violence
Discriminates against no one
Religion
Gives comforts the dying
Keeps the poor
From killing the rich
Explains the unknown using
Myth & Superstition
Causes War,
Genocide
& Discrimination towards women
Faith is the opiate for the masses
 
Happiness measured in grams
They say uneasy hearts weigh
the most,
So i carry this burden
Of heart break
Only eased by white lines
but as the grams run low
tensions run high
cause & effect
supply & demand
The cycle
Is never ending
the only alternative
being death
black & white
w/ no in between
no gray &
no middle ground
fighting to live
another day
dreaming of life
before the change
before the collapse
happiness was prevelent
Utter benevilence
so real & pure
5 years have passed
but its never
seemed so surreal
I'd rather die
than ask for help
fuck weakness
weakness gets you
killed,
weakness is the catalysts
of dishonor
& i refuse to disgrace
my family name
so for now
white lines
& red light districts
are all
i know
 
I hold her close
As we walk down
The busy Avenue
She holds my hand
I feel her warmth
& in this moment
Of complete nirvana
Life is perfect
The silence between us
is peaceful
yet powerful
our love needs no words
& this night needs no dialogue
this walk has no destination
just a night on the town
with my love
the cosmos above us
in the distance
the capital city skyline
illuminates the sky
out shining the stars
but none of that matters
she is my love
her beauty
her innocence
her youthfulness passion
complete me
i am hers
she is mine
& in this moment
we are one
 
The cities skyline pierces the heavens
Rain bleeds from the clouds
As smog suffocates the air
& Industrial lights out shine the stars
This is nature taken to the brink
Human ingenuity
Breaking the free from the
natural struggle of life
Curing the sick
& feeding the weak
Laughing in the face
Of adversity
We are our own God
 
Morning Brew
Starts the day off
with a bang
relieving
the pain of yesterdays
memories
& preventing the tremors
The warmth flows
Down into the depths
Of my Being
Euphoria shoots
through my veins
Feeling
Fully Cured of Morning Sickness
By my morning brew
 
Born to consume
Living to create
Driven by lust & greed
Killing for gain
Justified by god
The empowerment of few
To Enslave The masses
Forever Pursuing Wealth
Dying for nothing
Remembered for nothing
 
Imprisoned inside my mind
Filling the void you created
in me
with material objects
has left me feeling
empty.
helpless.
& hopeless, but determined
Determined to prove you wrong
Determined to show you i can make it
Determined to be a become a better
Man.
 
December Everyday
Time for boredom
Death of Determination
Catalysts of sorrow
Bitter Cold
Trapped inside
This sub society
No where to go
No place to run
This prison
My prison
& Winter is the warden
No prison walls
Just hills
& Wilderness
Just as isolated
Everyday is December.
 
Nice poems. You should start a blog to store these in, since all threads eventually expire. Keep writing!
 
Reliving the past
Ruins the Day
Corrupting the soul
Taking less
& Giving More
My heart craves you
& Your Love
But nothings good
Because nothing lasts
But your worth
the ever-present risk
of heartbreak
So give me
Strength & Hope
Help me keep
My head above
Rising Waters
Just for today
 
It goes On
Like the Breeze
& Rain
Disregard the past
& Forget the shame
Moving on
No Love is lost
in life
or death
we live on
only dying
when we refuse
to learn
from the constant
lesson
that is life.
 
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