girlcandy
Bluelighter
My layered world of Ketamine
I've been wanting to try Ketamine for a few weeks now but never really made the effort to organise. So when I found myself at a club on friday night, abandoned and alone, I met this group of crazy but fantastic people.....wow! what a night.
With mdma pumping through my veins, every drop carrying with it a morsel of joy and wonder, I was content. There I was, all bubble, smiles and giggles, when one of them offered my K! Yet again, something I wanted found it's way to me. I was smitten.
I don't think I'll ever be able to really explain to you what I saw, make you feel what I felt that night. Looking across the dimly lit chill-out room, neon-clad dancers, flashy painted walls, chairs, tables and all spaces in between suddenly became an intricate fusion of 'layers'.....hundreds and thousands of soft, silvery 'layers'. floor to celing, corner to corner, inbetween and everywhere, thin layers of 'glass'......
my world moved. i was lying somewhere in between a three and four dimensional world. I put my hand out, feeling the dense spaces,
but it was soft and fluffy, warm and comforting. grabbing at the particles of nothing, particles of colour, particles of life.
a few hits later, and my world still moved on, slowly and stealthily. It seemed as if the hands of time were being held back. On the dance floor, surrounded by hundreds of eager, happy people, my mind was so clear. cryastal pool clear. I can't recall exactly what it was I was thinking about, toying it about in my head, but I still see that moment when I realised that my thoughts were calm and patient, concise and true to it's own. My mind felt like eternity. I felt it's true potential.
I've always been wickedly aware of how far down my defenses drop when I've taken any mind altering substance, but I loved this more than any other. It just felt so right. Sometimes on e or coke, I feel it's falseness, knowing it would end soon. K. I knew it would too, but it was more the sense of finally learning how to open that door to my future, without fear, without pain, without force. It's a gift, I think.
I finally pottered of home, tired and hot. Elated, happy and full. Lying in bed, warm and clean, it all came back rushing, rushing, rushing. Maybe it was just too much to bear, too much to have all at once. I cried and cried, good tears. tears of release, tears of finally bacoming someone.........
I'll do it again, someday. in my own time, and see where i'll take myself this time.
[This message has been edited by girlcandy (edited 05 June 2001).]
I've been wanting to try Ketamine for a few weeks now but never really made the effort to organise. So when I found myself at a club on friday night, abandoned and alone, I met this group of crazy but fantastic people.....wow! what a night.
With mdma pumping through my veins, every drop carrying with it a morsel of joy and wonder, I was content. There I was, all bubble, smiles and giggles, when one of them offered my K! Yet again, something I wanted found it's way to me. I was smitten.
I don't think I'll ever be able to really explain to you what I saw, make you feel what I felt that night. Looking across the dimly lit chill-out room, neon-clad dancers, flashy painted walls, chairs, tables and all spaces in between suddenly became an intricate fusion of 'layers'.....hundreds and thousands of soft, silvery 'layers'. floor to celing, corner to corner, inbetween and everywhere, thin layers of 'glass'......
my world moved. i was lying somewhere in between a three and four dimensional world. I put my hand out, feeling the dense spaces,
but it was soft and fluffy, warm and comforting. grabbing at the particles of nothing, particles of colour, particles of life.
a few hits later, and my world still moved on, slowly and stealthily. It seemed as if the hands of time were being held back. On the dance floor, surrounded by hundreds of eager, happy people, my mind was so clear. cryastal pool clear. I can't recall exactly what it was I was thinking about, toying it about in my head, but I still see that moment when I realised that my thoughts were calm and patient, concise and true to it's own. My mind felt like eternity. I felt it's true potential.
I've always been wickedly aware of how far down my defenses drop when I've taken any mind altering substance, but I loved this more than any other. It just felt so right. Sometimes on e or coke, I feel it's falseness, knowing it would end soon. K. I knew it would too, but it was more the sense of finally learning how to open that door to my future, without fear, without pain, without force. It's a gift, I think.
I finally pottered of home, tired and hot. Elated, happy and full. Lying in bed, warm and clean, it all came back rushing, rushing, rushing. Maybe it was just too much to bear, too much to have all at once. I cried and cried, good tears. tears of release, tears of finally bacoming someone.........
I'll do it again, someday. in my own time, and see where i'll take myself this time.
[This message has been edited by girlcandy (edited 05 June 2001).]
